Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 4: Acknowledgement & Apologies

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] In this part of our series, the ex-QF moms of NLQ are speaking directly to our own Quivering Daughters ~ though we've already said our apologies in person, we want to acknowledge the abuse we inflicted on our children publicly for their sake, though we're doing it anonymously out of respect for their privacy.Trigger warning: As painful it has been for us to write these confessions down ~ it may be even tougher for the Quivering Daughters who were on the receiving end of our neglect and abuse to read.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*My children were everything to me. I remember t … [Read more...]

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Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 3: Perception

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieSo what is "abuse" and who gets to define it? Steadfast Daughters devotes a considerable amount of time and mental energy to this question. The trouble with making definitions central to the discussion is this: there's no way to do it without being condescending, petty and dismissive of Quivering Daughters who are reporting their highly personal, and necessarily highly subjective experiences of emotional and spiritual abuse.There is no objective way of defining and quantifying "abuse" ~ no way. Sorry. Try it if you must ~ but you will lose.Too many factors affect our … [Read more...]

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Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 2: Expectations

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieProverbs 22:6 says: Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.Damn ~ I really hate that verse. Let me tell you why.1) It is from this proverb that we Quiverfull moms got the idea that through diligent training we could ensure our children would become mature Christians firmly grounded in the Lord and His word. Of course, we all know that God has no grandchildren ~ our sons and daughters must come to their own faith in Christ ~ still, there is a promise implied in Proverbs 22:6 which leads QF parents to believe that by our in … [Read more...]

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Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 1: Sincerity

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieStacey McDonald, author of "Raising Maidens of Virtue: A Study of Feminine Loveliness for Mothers and Daughters," has set up a new website devoted to responding to Hillary McFarland's "Quivering Daughters" book and website.As one who embraced the idea of trusting the Lord with my family planning and devoted myself to raising up polished "arrows" fit for the Lord's service ~ "Raising Maidens of Virtue" was a much-referenced book in my large collection of "biblical family" materials. I loved the title. The words "Feminine Loveliness" filled my imagination with visions of … [Read more...]

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Family Man, Family Leader: To Train a Child – What a Train Wreck

by LivingForEternityIt is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is Thy faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23These are the words that my oldest daughter had printed on her graduations invitation. I am amazed at this, considering how she was raised for several years. It all started about two years after I had begun to home school my kids. A fellow mom gave me a copy of To Train a Child. She insisted it was the best help she ever had with raising her children. Since she had about eight at the time, I figured she must have known what she was talking about. Took the poison home and swallowed it.The whole premise of t … [Read more...]

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Family Man, Family Leader: The father-god in Lamb’s Wool

by LivingForEternityMy parents were luke-warm to the idea of their grandchildren being home schooled. Desperate for their approval I convinced my mom to attend a state home school convention with me. I had been to one previously and was so impressed with what the people had to say. Like a fool I had bought the books. I had not had time to study them thoroughly, but no matter I had them.The speakers at that year’s convention were the Denton Family. The mother and father would speak at the general sessions and the breakout ones. Their many children would be in charge of a children’s session. There had to be at least 200 – 300 children attending. There were other teenage helpers, but not man … [Read more...]

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NLQ FAQ: How did you get yourself into this mess?

Jonathan W. Rice (jwr)In late 2009, I learned that a journalist had written a book about the Quiverfull movement.[1]  I ordered the book and also discovered an online forum for survivors and refugees who’d fled from it (No Longer Quivering).  As far back as 1989, I’d known several families who fit the description but could never really understand their rationale.  I hoped the NLQ forum and the book might shed some light on their beliefs. I was not disappointed.In mid-February 2010, a thread title on the forum caught my eye: How did you get yourself into this mess?  The author, a female refugee from the movement, was wondering how she and so many others could have fallen for it in the fi … [Read more...]

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The problem with Quiverfull isn't in its advocacy of large families …

 What's NLQ Carnival Days, you might ask? It's arguably the most awesome idea for blog promotion that I've ever seen, and while every blog we blogroll is worthy in its own way, No Longer Quivering is one to which you ought to be paying attention, as the teabagger lunatics take over the Republican Party. Vyckie of NLQ started the blog to tell her story of her "escape" from the Quiverfull movement.The problem with Quiverfull isn't in its advocacy of large families, it's in its view of women, and in questions about just how much "free will" is involved with women who become embroiled in its clutches. Kathryn Joyce wrote about Quiverfull, and about Vyckie, back in March, and what emerges is … [Read more...]

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Will use your book in my college class

Vyckie,I have been reading your posts- actually soaking it all up like a sponge might be a better way of putting it. I am a college instructor and graduate student, finishing up my PhD in sociology at NC State. I have, for the most part, avoided the topic of religion with my students here in the Bible Belt. I just wanted to let you know that when you publish your book I will have my students buy it and read it. I support your endeavor. You do a phenomenal job of explaining the appeal of the QF movement and the ups/downs of a patriarchal culture. You analyze your own emotions amazingly well and connect everything to capitalism, your traumatic childhood, and so many sociological … [Read more...]

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"Very brave women …"

No Longer Quivering is an organization by and for very brave women who have lived a life of parallel reality in a country commonly perceived to be the land of the free.Yet, there is a culture of extremism that skews and twists the Christian Bible, further empowering the males and subjugating the women to extreme servitude and excessive child-bearing. It is truly abuse - spousal abuse & child abuse - and deprives the indoctrinated from joy and a quality of life that is unavailable to them.This organization is unique and crucial in addressing the questions from those women who have already removed themselves from their misogynist environments, but who now need to feel connected with a c … [Read more...]

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