CTBHHM: Debi’s Abuse Meter is Broken

ctthhm

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love Joy FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, p. 92Here we come to the end of Debi’s discussion of the three types of men she lays out—Command Man, Mr. Visionary, Mr. Steady. In this summary section, Debi compares the actions that the “Ruination Wife” can take to destroy a marriage to each of the three types with the actions the “Successful Wife” can take to heal a marriage to each of the three types. Let’s take a look: … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: The Command Man Tames the Shrew

ctthhm

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love Joy FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 77-80You might want to start out by getting a glass of wine. You’re going to need it. … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: How To Be an Abused Woman

ctthhm

by Libby AnneCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 54-55***trigger warning***Debi starts this passage by laying out what she calls “God’s Blueprint for Marriage.” She first quotes several verses: … [Read more...]

roses – how the purity culture taught me to be abused

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by Samantha[warning: I am going to be talking about sensitive, sex-related issues today, including rape and sexual assault. ]First, let me share my rationale … [Read more...]

An Open Letter to Ellie Ponder Woman

unmasking

by CaluluDear Ellie Ponder Woman– Listen Please!Several days ago I was directed to your blog by a friend and before I knew it I was drawn in. I read every entry, particularly those involving the struggles in your marriage with incidents of domestic violence. You stated that you wanted to glorify God through your postings, testify to His mercy, love, restoration and miracles. Which is fine because every blog author has their own central theme.I know from reading your comments and commenting policy page that any concerns I might post for you there will only be deleted and considered hateful attacks by the enemy. I'm not writing about this out of hate, but concern for another human b … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Questioning Q. 3

by Libby Anne (and friends)Cross posted from  Love, Joy, Feminism.Raised Quiverfull Introduction — Questioning SummaryPlease be sure to click the above links to see an introduction to and explanation of this project, which involves a panel of nine young adults who were raised in Quiverfull families and have since questioned and left that ideology answering questions about their experiences.What did you struggle with most when you were in the midst of questioning and/or leaving Christian Patriarchy/Quiverfull ideology? What was the hardest part?Joe:Hell.  I struggled with that for all of five minutes.  Then, it didn’t matter anymore.  There was no proof of anythin … [Read more...]

Just Pray for Him: How the Christian Church Refuses to Hold Abusive Men Accountable

abuse

By Lisa Kroulik © Cross posted with permission from Hub Pages - http://nybride710.hubpages.com/hub/How-the-Christian-Church-is-Failing-Abused-Women One of the more difficult things to recover from during the process of divorce from my narcissistic ex-husband was the treatment I received from other Christians. To be fair, none of it was intentionally mean-spirited and all of these people truly believed they were encouraging me from God's word. Unfortunately, the “advice” I received kept me trapped in an abusive marriage three years longer than I should have been.The thing is, all of the responsibility for keeping my marriage together was placed squarely on … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Questioning, Q. 2

by Libby AnneRaised Quiverfull Introduction — Questioning SummaryPlease be sure to click the above links to see an introduction to and explanation of this project, which involves a panel of nine young adults who were raised in Quiverfull families and have since questioned and left that ideology answering questions about their experiences.  What first made you question the beliefs you were raised with? Was this initial questioning a frightening or liberating experience?Joe:I can’t put a finger on one experience that made me question my beliefs.  When I mention my beliefs, I must say that I have rejected everything from quiverful and fundamentalist C … [Read more...]

Happily Abused

Can you say, "Stockholm Syndrome'?

Trigger warning: Christian woman's advice to abused wives reads like a handbook for ascetic self-mortification. How to Use a Woman's Faith & Trust to Make Her a Willing Accomplice to Her Own Abuseby Vyckie GarrisonAfter stumbling across yet another piece of alarmingly dangerous advice for abused women of faith titled, Surviving Emotional Abuse Six Steps by Christian author, Darcy Ingraham, I am wishing I had more middle fingers with which to express my extreme irritation. Ack!I will try to calm down long enough to use my words rather than profane gestures to talk about spiritual abuse.To begin with the author assumes that only those husbands who abandon their faith … [Read more...]

Who Was That Masked Man? Part 7

by CaluluAfter the incident with the pregnant daughter of a friend we had another reprieve from Tom and Tina. We'd see them at church but they'd stopped coming to the bible study group. I'd heard that they were both going through this other ministry's counseling. The other ministry sounded sort of like Scientology in that you have to confess all your deepest darkest sins, area by area each week to the counseling team and then the team would lead you in repentance, prayer and forgiveness. It kept the Smiths out of our hair for about a year with the exception of about every other month one of the Smiths would corner me and demand we all become friends again.No chance of that. Even our … [Read more...]


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