Not Quoting Quiverfull: Financial Abuse

together

There's a type of spousal abuse that we're not spoken of here at NLQ -  Financial Abuse.What is financial abuse?It's when a partner controls the money of the household so tightly that there isn't any or enough given over to meet the basic needs of the other partner and/or children. By controlling all of the family finances the controlling partner puts the other under their complete control, even if there is no physical or verbal abuse this is also now considered spousal abuse.Huffington Post did a story recently on financial abuse filled with horrifying tales of what some women have had to live through before escaping their controlling partners. … [Read more...]

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Quoting Quiverfull: Don’t Divorce Your Abuser?

Cannot stomach the photos of abusers and their abused so here's a pretty picture of sun conure parrots instead

from Ladies Against Feminism and Christian Worldview - What Should an Abused Spouse Do?Trigger warning for harmful advice. The posting at Ladies Against Feminism and Christian Worldview has a very triggering photograph of abuse.My suggestion is that you tell your husband that you want to be married to him, and that your goal is reconciliation, but that you are no longer willing to live under abuse. He has a choice to make. He needs to seek help, counseling and accountability through a local … [Read more...]

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Spiritual Abuse and Whitewashed Marriage

regretfulbride

by Mere Dreamer cross posted from her blog Love is Not Equal to Love(Editor’s note: Please welcome Mere Dreamer to NLQ and the SASBN! Another great addition to our group!)I grew up in a 3rd world mission where the horror stories of Northern news overshadowed all other impressions of the US, though I determined to move there after graduation in spite of the fear. My 17 year old, culture-shocked self feared the six block walk from the school to work, morbidly certain it was inevitable that I would be kidnapped and raped. … [Read more...]

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Quoting Quiverfull: Divorce and Abuse?

Quotes1-300x250 (2)

by Michael Pearl of No Greater Joy - Divorce and AbuseThere is a treasure trove of Michael Pearl answering Bible Questions on YouTube and  No Greater Joy. Trigger warning for Christianese and meat butchering. … [Read more...]

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Religion Makes Abuse Easy

Field

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am Phoenix(Editor's Note - Let's all welcome AJ as she is the newest member of NLQ's Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network! Welcome AJ!)Religion makes abuse easy. There it is, pure and simple. A truth I've born witness to.Walk with me down this road. Travel back in time with me, and open the window to the kitchen in my parents' house. Poke your head in and listen with me. Look at the old farmstead kitchen table, and the meek kids with their heads lowered in submission, while the patriarch booms on at the head of the table, lecturing and teaching after dinner before everyone's dismissed from the table. … [Read more...]

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roses – how the purity culture taught me to be abused

wiltedrose

by Samantha[warning: I am going to be talking about sensitive, sex-related issues today, including rape and sexual assault. ]First, let me share my rationale … [Read more...]

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An Open Letter to Ellie Ponder Woman

unmasking

by CaluluDear Ellie Ponder Woman– Listen Please!Several days ago I was directed to your blog by a friend and before I knew it I was drawn in. I read every entry, particularly those involving the struggles in your marriage with incidents of domestic violence. You stated that you wanted to glorify God through your postings, testify to His mercy, love, restoration and miracles. Which is fine because every blog author has their own central theme.I know from reading your comments and commenting policy page that any concerns I might post for you there will only be deleted and considered hateful attacks by the enemy. I'm not writing about this out of hate, but concern for another human b … [Read more...]

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Just Pray for Him: How the Christian Church Refuses to Hold Abusive Men Accountable

abuse

By Lisa Kroulik © Cross posted with permission from Hub Pages - http://nybride710.hubpages.com/hub/How-the-Christian-Church-is-Failing-Abused-Women One of the more difficult things to recover from during the process of divorce from my narcissistic ex-husband was the treatment I received from other Christians. To be fair, none of it was intentionally mean-spirited and all of these people truly believed they were encouraging me from God's word. Unfortunately, the “advice” I received kept me trapped in an abusive marriage three years longer than I should have been.The thing is, all of the responsibility for keeping my marriage together was placed squarely on … [Read more...]

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Happily Abused

Can you say, "Stockholm Syndrome'?

Trigger warning: Christian woman's advice to abused wives reads like a handbook for ascetic self-mortification. How to Use a Woman's Faith & Trust to Make Her a Willing Accomplice to Her Own Abuseby Vyckie GarrisonAfter stumbling across yet another piece of alarmingly dangerous advice for abused women of faith titled, Surviving Emotional Abuse Six Steps by Christian author, Darcy Ingraham, I am wishing I had more middle fingers with which to express my extreme irritation. Ack!I will try to calm down long enough to use my words rather than profane gestures to talk about spiritual abuse.To begin with the author assumes that only those husbands who abandon their faith … [Read more...]

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Who Was That Masked Man? Part 7

by CaluluAfter the incident with the pregnant daughter of a friend we had another reprieve from Tom and Tina. We'd see them at church but they'd stopped coming to the bible study group. I'd heard that they were both going through this other ministry's counseling. The other ministry sounded sort of like Scientology in that you have to confess all your deepest darkest sins, area by area each week to the counseling team and then the team would lead you in repentance, prayer and forgiveness. It kept the Smiths out of our hair for about a year with the exception of about every other month one of the Smiths would corner me and demand we all become friends again.No chance of that. Even our … [Read more...]

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