More Catholic Than The Pope: I could be good for him if he would love me and care for me

by MusicMomWhile my mother happily explored feminism and piled all of her frustrated hopes and dreams into my older sister, Aprille, I found myself in the new and different position of being my father's confidant and friend. My mother's transition from traditional womanhood into modern feminist had sent many ripples through our family life, and one of them bumped right into my traditional, conservative and passive father. Used to being deferred and catered to, his wife was now out protesting the need for bike paths and going to school for journalism.My mother and sister were very close – Aprille was her wonder girl – very intelligent, ambitious and empowered by mom to achieve eve … [Read more...]

The Destiny of a Virtuous Daughter ~ Part I: Beginnings of the Mask

by Starfury  Who is that girl I see staring straight back at me? -MulanFor as long as I can remember, I was somebody else. My driving factors were love, approval, and being wanted, for who I was. That never came, in part due to the fact that in my work to achieve my goals I molded who I was to others' specifications. As a result, I am trying to figure out who I am, even though I'm now an adult. Even now, it is easy to slip into the role that I deem others expect of me. It is hard to summon up the strength to remove the mask I've become so good at wearing, out of fear of reproach and backlash.Ultimately, I was to be the perfect daughter. My family had to appear as the model family, … [Read more...]

More Catholic Than The Pope: Feminism became my enemy of choice and I vowed to aim my life’s energy at its destruction

by MusicMomI was born in the midst of the flower children and hippie ferver – 1967.  More importantly, for where I ended up in my life, I was born a few years after Betty Friedan wrote “The Feminine Mystique” which raised the consciousness of millions of educated American housewives as to what was exactly that nagging “problem with no name”. My mother was a rich, educated southern belle.  She graduated from Sweet Briar College in Virginia (yes, that actually is a women's college, not a fairy-tale castle) in 1960 and married the son of a NY judge, my dad.  They moved to NY and began the early-60's version of the American dream.  Dad got a job as a stockbroker and mom stayed home to … [Read more...]

Why Did She Do That?!

Rachel Scott's crazy-making tactics on the Joy Behar Show  Look, Mimi~ I'm on TV!  LOLWhen I first received the phone call asking me to go to New York to be interviewed on the Joy Behar Show ~ I had to admit that I had no idea who Joy Behar is.  "I am still pretty culturally illiterate after all my years as a fundamentalist Quiverfuller," I explained.  "We do have cable TV now, but the kids keep it tuned to the Disney Channel."  So, I can tell you all about Demi Levato, Selena Gomez, the Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus ... in fact, I think I've got Hannah Montana's basic hairstyle ... :)Anyway ... I quickly brought myself up to speed on Joy ~ and on Tuesday, Nov. 3 ~ I had the opportunity t … [Read more...]

Where are the Instructions?

by AriettyIn the last months of my marriage I was gradually coming out of the fear laden fog that had been my life in fundamentalism. Now that I had internet access I would find myself reading more and more things written from a non-Christian perspective. I had joined a few forums based around interests I had but spent more and more time reading the off-topic threads. I was often blown away by how much grace some of these people showed in flame wars or contentious discussions, how much humility they had towards their own beliefs. Wasn't grace "our" word? It was at first disturbing to learn so much from people who did not follow Christ but after a time I grew used to it and found myself … [Read more...]

Guardians of the Home

by Alyzza MartinShe is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. – Proverbs 31:14-16Women around the world have historically been called upon to take care of domestic duties such as hauling water, preparing food, and disposing of waste. In areas where women are denied access to political power, “female concerns” like water security and waste management barely register on the political radar.Countries with poor track records in recognizing and maintaining women’s rights are a … [Read more...]

Will use your book in my college class

Vyckie,I have been reading your posts- actually soaking it all up like a sponge might be a better way of putting it. I am a college instructor and graduate student, finishing up my PhD in sociology at NC State. I have, for the most part, avoided the topic of religion with my students here in the Bible Belt. I just wanted to let you know that when you publish your book I will have my students buy it and read it. I support your endeavor. You do a phenomenal job of explaining the appeal of the QF movement and the ups/downs of a patriarchal culture. You analyze your own emotions amazingly well and connect everything to capitalism, your traumatic childhood, and so many sociological … [Read more...]

All Saints

by caluluToday was All Saints Day, November 1. It’s the one day where I miss my late father the most. He and I were the two in our large New Orleans clan that would observe the rituals of All Saints. We’d pack a picnic lunch of poboys and potato salad along with cleaning supplies and head out to the cemetery with my ancient Great Aunts.  In South Louisiana entire families turn out at the graveyard to spend time remembering and honoring dead relatives by cleaning the tombstones. A special time of family remembrances and togetherness. It was our ritual that I still carry out when I’m in South Louisiana.It’s a ritual that my years in fundamentalist Quiverful country robbed from me. In my y … [Read more...]

An open letter to Frank Schaeffer

Dear Frank,I am a former Christian homeschooling mother of seven who finally walked away from fundamentalism after our radical extremism drove my oldest daughter to attempt suicide ~ and I would like to help you spread your message and sell your books.In bible college, your father was my absolute hero ~ I read all of his books and was determined to study Christian apologetics until I could defend my faith as skillfully as Francis Schaeffer!However, as the years went by, fundamentalist "family values" put me in my place as a woman ~ and so I shifted my focus and that's when your mother, Edith became my role model as I devoted myself to homemaking and motherhood.I dutifully birthed … [Read more...]

Biblical sexism tops "Ten worst verses in the Bible"

I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. (1 Timothy 2:12) by VyckieRecently, I came across a "Ship of Fools" video which invited people to submit their nominations for the "Ten worst verses of the Bible"At first, I assumed that Ship of Fools must be an atheist website holding this "Worst Verse" contest as a way to raise awareness of some of the horrific messages contained in the pages of the Christian scriptures.  My assumption was based mainly on the website's name since Psalm 14:1 tells us that "The fool" says in his heart, "There is no God."  Plus ~ who else would sponsor this sort of bible-bashing contest? … [Read more...]


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