"Miscarriage is for a moment; a soul is forever"

Doug Phillips’ “Hopeful Theology of Miscarriage”

Speaking this past weekend at “The Baby Conference,” in San Antonio, Texas, Vision Forum speaker, Doug Phillips gave a talk entitled, “A Hopeful Theology of Miscarriage” ~ a summary of which, Phillips shared on his blog.

After taking the position that not all children who die go to heaven ~ but only the “children called of God,” Phillips discussed “the significant role that the unborn and young children play in God’s’ covenant of grace …” and then added:

Though acknowledging the sadness and loss of miscarriage — with he and his wife Beall having lost two unborn children — Doug offered two key points of hope that the loss of a child in the womb can bring:

  1. The hope of discipling our families on the priorities, nobilities, and sacrifices of Motherhood.
  2. The hope that tragedy provides to model confidence in the sovereignty of God to your children and the world.

Somehow ~ this is supposed to bring comfort to mothers who have lost children through miscarriage. Plus, it should be a great lesson about the nature and dealings of God for children and “the world” too! Ack.

Christian Culture Clash: Fundamentalist Patriarchy and My Father’s Church

Part 1 ~ Our Church: Golgotha

by Ex-Adriel

Sundays were my favorite. Early in the morning, before the sun rose, Father knocked on my bedroom door. I dressed quickly in the pre-dawn dimness, and we drove to church together, just us two. A quick stop for the customary chocolate crème pie from a gas station, and then we would be at Golgotha*, pulling into the empty lot before anyone else arrived for church.

Father ran the bus ministry. In that morning stillness, I snuggled into an extra coat of his to protect my church dress, and ‘helped’ him check the fluids and tire pressure on the old school bus. When I was a young child, I rode with him off to the shelters to pick up all of the homeless who were willing to submit to a sermon for a chance at a hearty lunch and a shower. Later, after we met John and his wife Mary*, that would change and I would be left at the church alone in the morning stillness, usually ending up in the mysterious choir loft, suspended high above the sanctuary.

I loved Golgotha. I know now that it was unique – a charismatic Lutheran church. That never happens. But it did. As a child, I only knew that it was a wonderful church. We sang hymns and praise music. I was an altar-child and carried the taper lights and the cross up the center aisle at the beginning of the service, along with most of my age-mates. We wore long robes and sang in the choir, and took communion every Sunday. We kept to the yearly order of readings, but we also had regular altar calls and a praise dance troupe. I could have been happy there forever, and I think Father would have been as well, but Mother wanted more.

Time Heals All Wounds ~ Part 7: A Godly, God-Fearing Man

All beautiful the march of days, as seasons come and go; The Hand that shaped the rose hath wrought the crystal of the snow

I was feeling inadequate as a wife and mother lately, but had no clue why. Maybe it was because Cecilia called her husband Sir, and was always hanging on his every word. This had been making me nervous for a while now.

I remember asking her about it one day and she only shared, that Sarah called Abraham “Lord.” It was a matter of respect.

I took a moment, trying to imagine myself, calling my husband Lord, or even Sir. I could not help but chuckle each time I said it to myself. Is this something that a Godly wife was suppose to do? Should I be asking my husband if he would prefer I call him Lord, or Sir?

I have always been a laid back sort of wife and mother. My husband never complained about anything. We were both genuinely happy, and so were our four children. I tried hard not to butt in, as our husbands continued speaking. Cecilia’s husband continued to share the details, of this so-called trip, with my husband.

I kept hearing Cecilia’s husband repeating himself that we “REALLY” needed to go to one of these week-long marriage and parenting conventions. That it would change our life. It kept sounding amplified in my ears… I knew my husband though, and knew he was already feeling red flags with this sudden rash conversation. I could feel it, and see it in his eyes.

The Cult of Masculinity ~ Part 4: Family Values

Yikes ~ I’ve kind of been wearing myself out working on the website redesign and today I’m super tired ~ so not much energy for posting. This segment of my review of chapter 4, “The Cult of Masculinity” from American Fascists by Chris Hedges will be a quickie ~ but to me it’s critical and very personally distressing considering that I spent over 16 years promoting “family values” through our family newspaper. Throughout those years, I had the vague feeling of being used by the pro-family organizations like Focus on the Family, the American Family Association, Family Research Council, etc. I could never quite put my finger on the dissatisfaction I was having with the program ~but reading this portion of Hedges’ book has really clarified what had been bugging me for all those years.

The Cult of Masculinity ~ Part 3: Black & White Thinking

There runs through the fundamentalist belief system a deep dread of ambiguity, disorder and chaos. … It fosters a world of binary opposites: God and man, saved and unsaved, the church and the world, Christianity and secular humanism, male and female. These tidy pairings keep life from slipping back into a complicated nightmare. Reality, thus defined, is made predictable and understandable, something deeply comforting to believers who have had trouble coping with the messiness of human existence.. ~ Chris Hedges, American Fascists, p. 83

Black & white thinking ~ to me, this is the core definition of Fundamentalism.

Everything was either/or ~ which, as Hedges points out in his chapter titled “The Cult of Masculinity,” really does simplify the decision-making process and made our otherwise-overwhelming-world neat and tidy and easily comprehensible.