Discussing Toxic Patriarchy and Spiritual Abuse

by Cindy Kunsmans cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceOriginally published in 2010 and titled 'To New or Disgruntled Readers'For people who visit here for the first time and find themselves a bit “challenged,” I would like to address some of the common problems that people tend to have with the nature of the material that I post here. (I call it the "Gadfly Effect," something echoing the "Gadfly of Athens" title attributed to Socrates because he asked pesky questions that no one wanted to think about.) … [Read more...]

The Letter

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsEditor's note: The Letter was written several years ago and is an excellent example of how we feel post church after being abused.It’s been about a year now.  A year since I went to counseling.  I only had a handful of sessions.  You’ll read about that in parts 3 and 4 of my story which I plan to make public within the next few days.  One of the last things my counselor suggested was that I write my then-pastor a letter – not to be sent, of course, because, well, it wouldn’t have mattered.  But just to tell him all of the things that I wanted to say but couldn’t because he wouldn’t meet with me.  This letter captures the essence of … [Read more...]

Celebrate Yourself! Part 2

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am Phoenix I love music. I play the piano and just started learning to play guitar. Animals. I am drawn towards them. I feel more comfortable around them than I do around most people. I feel like I am grounded around them, and I draw energy and peace from being around them. I like to think that I bounce that energy and those good vibes back to them. I was holding my nephew's bunny Alfie the other night. I was at a dinner party and I was on the verge of passing out and feeling sick. But if I concentrated on Alfie, I could re-center myself and not go as deep into a crash as I otherwise would have.  Alfie's nose just kept wiggling and his whiskers kept time wi … [Read more...]

Celebrate Yourself! Part 1

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am Phoenix So I have been comparing my old beliefs and new beliefs a good bit lately.  I guess there was one old and new habit that I haven't explored much yet. Maybe I haven't explored it because I haven't settled comfortably into the new habit even as of now? … [Read more...]

You’re Not Broken

by Eliza Do Lots from her blog I Run on CaffeineFor long periods in my life, I’ve felt broken. Broken by things that have happened to me, by the things that other people have done, and said, to me. About me. I’ve felt that I’m shattered into pieces, and don’t know how to carry on, and I’ve felt lost, and alone, and afraid.In those times, where I’ve felt that I’m simply the dust that once made up a person, with no idea how to put myself back together, I’ve wished for someone or something to walk into my life and sweep me back together into some semblance of a whole.I’ve sought out a fix, a solution, a magic Fairy Godmother or dashing Prince Charming, to take over and tell me, or s … [Read more...]

Sunday Quotes – Empty Cup

As found on Facebook...Stay in touch! Like No Longer Quivering on Facebook:No Longer QuiveringIf this is your first time visiting NLQ please read our Welcome page and our Comment Policy!Copyright notice: If you use any content from NLQ, including any of our research or Quoting Quiverfull quotes, please give us credit and a link back to this site. All original content is owned by No Longer Quivering and Patheos.comRead our hate mail at Jerks 4 JesusContact NLQ at SuzanneNLQ@gmail.com Comments open below NLQ Recommended Reading … Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement by Kathryn Joyce 13:24 - A Story of Faith and Obsession by M Dolon H … [Read more...]

Safely Tucked in the Middle? Contrasting and Comparing Camus and Christy

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman from Under Much Grace used with permissionCatherine Marshall authored Christy, the historical fiction novel which was based on her mother's experiences in a remote mountain community in Tennessee. In the picture shown here, I included a rendition of her book which features Kellie Martin who played the protagonist in the CBS TV drama that was developed from the novel a number of years ago. (I figured that her work might be more recognizable that way.)Catherine was a Christian who was married to Peter Marshall, the famed, early 20th Century, Scottish-born, Presbyterian minister in Washington, … [Read more...]

For New-Found Victims

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsEditor's note: Ellen is speaking directly to new readers at her blog, but the same words apply here as well. Welcome to new readers here who've been spiritually abused, victimized by religion and are discovering that they are not the only ones.Welcome.Perhaps you found this blog because are just realizing that what you or someone you know is experiencing is “just not right.”  There are many websites and blogs that have information on spiritual abuse.  Some are very comprehensive and detailed … [Read more...]

My Healing Continues

by Living Liminal cross posted from her blog Living LiminalIn recent years, I've become accustomed to certain people pretending that I don't exist. If I won't shut up and go away or roll over and play dead, the only option left, apparently, is for them to refuse to acknowledge my existence.There was a time when it used to upset me. Eventually, I got to a place where it mostly amused me. … [Read more...]

What Christians Mean When They Say I’m “Bitter”

by Samantha Field cross posted from her blog Samanthapfield.comMy great-grandfather was stationed in the Aleutian Islands during WWII. He told us a lot of stories about living there– like being trapped inside the mess hall once because a moose was standing out in the street and no sane person screws around with a moose— but one of the tidbits that stuck out to me the most was an interesting detail about their water. It wasn’t clear, and had a bitter taste to it. When he asked someone why, they explained that the pipes were made out of wood and plants had grown through them to get to the water. Those roots left an oily residue that caused the bitterness. … [Read more...]