Adventures in Recovery ~ Surfing

by CaluluOne of the great enduring passions of my life has been surfing. I've surfed off and on since I was in my teens. My father taught me and we'd scour the weather reports for tidal surges during hurricane season in south Louisiana, waiting till the waves came. The Gulf of Mexico is like a tepid bath, calm, warm and blue-green most of the time. We chased the storms to ride the waves, cruising over to Pensacola or Destin, Florida to ride the wild surf.I loved surfing. It was by turns like dancing with the ocean and carrying out a battle. I felt powerful, warrior-like when I surfed. There was just nothing else like it.Years later after I married and had children I stopped surfing for … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 6: Soul-Binding

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughtersby the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.]by DaisyMy name is Daisy.I am a good person...but I was a bad parent.Tragically, by choosing QF/patriarchal fundamentalist methodology as the pattern for my home, believing that it would provide the very best insurance against messing up with parenthood, I messed up. I messed up badly. I hurt my kids and, worse, I silenced them when they tried to tell me about it. Criticizing your parents is, of course, disrespectful and therefore opening a dangerous door that may lead a child ultimately to rebelling against God - and as I believed that put my child in danger of hellfire, of … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 5: Confessions of a Quiverfull Hero

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by DaisyI was only 19 when I arrived at Christianity’s door, bruised and highly impressionable and, because of my family situation, determined to do a better job of sorting out my life than my parents had done. Victims of abuse in their own homes, my parents had learned very early to dissociate from their emotions. Our home was an emotionally sterile one and, although I know now that this is not true, as as child I believed my parents did not love me. I decided that when *I* had kids, if they grew up knowing nothing else, they would know for sure that I loved them more than br … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 1: Sincerity

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieStacey McDonald, author of "Raising Maidens of Virtue: A Study of Feminine Loveliness for Mothers and Daughters," has set up a new website devoted to responding to Hillary McFarland's "Quivering Daughters" book and website.As one who embraced the idea of trusting the Lord with my family planning and devoted myself to raising up polished "arrows" fit for the Lord's service ~ "Raising Maidens of Virtue" was a much-referenced book in my large collection of "biblical family" materials. I loved the title. The words "Feminine Loveliness" filled my imagination with visions of … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ Sending Out An SOS

by CaluluA few days ago I got an SOS call from work. Rosie called with that most dire of all emergencies, they were out of toilet paper. Where's Mr. Whipple when you need him?Since we're an artsy bunch we're not the most practical and we tend to run out of things or have massive fail on things practical. During my fundamentalist years I used to beat myself up internally about my lack of domestic ability and interest. Now I realize I'm simply hard wired very differently than the perfect wives and housekeepers I knew at church. And that's okay.Took me a long time to realize it didn't matter a hill of beans to the universe if I was practical or impractical or if my living room was … [Read more...]

Visionary daughters quiz

Over on the NLQ forum, we've all been taking Visionary Daughter's "Are You A Fool?" quiz ~ it's annoyingly hilarious ~ and I thought No Longer Quivering readers who aren't on the forum might like the chance to join in on the fun. Here's question #1:How do you respond when criticized/corrected?1) I hate it! I get angry and defensive.2) I usually laugh it off. (Sometimes I roll my eyes.)3) If I get criticized for the same thing enough times, I usually start to take it seriously..4) I’m thankful for the smallest hint of reproof and take it very seriously.Take the Quiz!!What do you think? Post your comments below ~ or join the forum to participate in this and many other interesting … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ The Big Truth

by CaluluMidnight. I'm in my kerchief and the hubby is in his cap when from the lawn across the street there arose such a clatter....Unfortunately for us it wasn't jolly old Saint Nick or even The Grinch with his little dog Max, it was merely our neighbors, the Bumpasses. Their name isn't really 'Bumpass' but after they moved in they proved by their behavior that they had to be related to the original Bumpasses in the movie, 'The Christmas Story' And yes, they have a pile of hound dogs that would gladly eat your turkey if they could get to it.The Bumpasses got along with no one in the neighborhood and now they were busy cementing their reputation as the neighborhood jerks by trying to … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 2 ~ Cousins

by WanderingOneWhen I was four years old my cousin Aaron was born to my mom's sister. The next year, my sister, and three other cousins were born on my mom's side. After that, every year, two or three or sometimes all four of my mom's sisters were pregnant.  By the time I was eight, I had thirteen cousins on that side of my family. When my sister and I were added in, that meant there were there were fifteen of us, and I was the only one not the age of five.   More often than not (we lived relatively near one another), my mother would take my sister and I over to one of her sisters' houses to do our schoolwork, or to help out with housework.  And we might not be the only cousins over that da … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ Pearl Clutching

by CaluluThe other day I had to attend a meeting at work. One of the big subjects was a new dress code. Now, instead of our usual jeans or casual skirts with tees, we'd have to wear business attire. The boss was insistent that if you couldn't wear pearls with your ensemble and look appropriate then you were under dressed for work. My jaw dropped when she suggested pearls and a twin set. Most everyone else in the room started clutching their pearls by voicing negative opinions. No one on the work team felt happy about the new rules.Bosslady was especially concerned with the fact that there we were at a team meeting and three of us were wearing flip flops in late October. For added giggles … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ Rolling A Big Doughnut With A Snake In A Vest

by CaluluAuthors note: I realize not all fundamentalist, Quiverful or patriarchal churches believe in signs or dreams. I've seen a number of them that are strictly Bible-based but just as many that do believe God is talking to them through their dreams and a million other things.From the movie “Pee Wee's Big Adventure”Simone: Do you have any dreams?Pee Wee: Yeah, I'm all alone. I'm rolling a big doughnut and this snake wearing a vest..During my years at Possum Creek Christian Fellowship there was a great deal of emphasis put on dreams and other totems being key to knowing the mind of God. They were always looking for deeper meanings in the natural and in the everyday. As a result I … [Read more...]