Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Three Types of Women – Part 3

bridezillas

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideDebi moves on to Priestly/Steady/Servant women."My daughter who wrote the Teacher's Guide for this book is a Servant, similar to a Priest type.  From the time she was a small child, she "mothered" her little sister.  She always enjoyed caring for the elderly.  She was a wonderful young daughter, helping me do anything around the house."That sounds like a miserable childhood, actually.  The daughter, who she never bothers to name in the chapter, is her second daughter Shiloh."She is a peacemaker, kind, and considerate." People never cease to amaze me.  Sometimes the apple falls far away from the tree. … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: God or Husband—Whom Do I Obey?

obeytherules

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 210—211Debi just finished telling her readers that God’s desire is for mothers to be keepers in the home, and that if they leave their children with others (even for as little as ten minutes) their children could end up molested or worse. She went so far as to say that not being a stay at home mother was to commit blasphemy against God. Now she addresses an important question, because she has put her readers in a bit of a dilemma.Whom Do I Obey?  What if your husband tells you to go to work and leave your children at day care or with a baby-sitter, in conflict with God’s command for you t … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Lydia’s Courtship

preparing

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideChapter Two begins with this title page: Discovering God's Will Moral to the Story: God often leads us down his path through the counsel of those who are wiser.I agree with wholeheartedly with the moral.  I have been so grateful for excellent advice given lovingly by my parents, siblings, my in-laws, my teachers, professors, people I've worked with and random strangers to name a few. … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Michael and Debi Pearl’s Whirlwind Romance

ctthhm

by Libby AnneCreated to Be His Help Meet, pp. 13-15 Once upon a time there was a silly young girl who grew up to learn what it means to be a help meet – God’s secret for a heavenly marriage. I start this book with the words “Once upon a time” because it … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Role of a Help Meet?

Quoting

Michael Pearl in "In Search of a Help Meet" Be warned, there is a general misunderstanding, among both men and women, as to the nature of a help meet. Eve was not created to just carry extra weight on the trail, or to speed up the process … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 4 ~ Little Things

by WanderingOneI am a nail-biter.  I don’t bite them because I’m nervous or scared or anything like that.  I just…chew.  My nails are ugly and jagged; short and stumpy.  I hate the way they look.Growing up my parents tried to discipline me out of the habit.  It showed a lack of self-control, an inadequate ability for self-restraint.  I tried to stop.   I hated disappointing them.  I was afraid of punishment.  And yet, I never could shake the habit.  I bit and chewed—perhaps it was a form of unconscious resistance:  this small imperfection, this awful habit, was a small way of ensuring that my parents’ authority was not absolute.  Maybe it was just a bad habit I could never kick.In any c … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 3 ~ Biblical Chastisement

by WanderingOneAt this point, I think it's necessary to write something about how things changed after my sister was born. It's hard to know what to say here—I do not want to tell my sister's story for her, nor could I presume to do so. But it would be disingenuous to attempt to write about my life without explaining how and why things changed. My little sister was, in so many ways, my opposite. Where I was shy, quiet, reserved and even timid, she was outgoing, bold, adventurous, and confident. I went to her Sunday School class rather than my own; I followed her lead in so many things, even though I was the older of the two of us. This didn't always work very well, given that I was s … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 2 ~ Cousins

by WanderingOneWhen I was four years old my cousin Aaron was born to my mom's sister. The next year, my sister, and three other cousins were born on my mom's side. After that, every year, two or three or sometimes all four of my mom's sisters were pregnant.  By the time I was eight, I had thirteen cousins on that side of my family. When my sister and I were added in, that meant there were there were fifteen of us, and I was the only one not the age of five.   More often than not (we lived relatively near one another), my mother would take my sister and I over to one of her sisters' houses to do our schoolwork, or to help out with housework.  And we might not be the only cousins over that da … [Read more...]

Quiverfull Daughters: The Making of a Helpmeet

TLC's 19 Kids & Counting: The Duggar Family on How To Prepare For Courtship & Marriageby Hopewell“Helpmeet” is such an odd-sounding word to modern ears! But it resonates well in the lingo of the King James Bible. Girls born to Quiverfull families begin their training for the life’s calling as a Helpmeet [aka wife and homemaker] almost at birth.Girls are born for one and only one reason: to serve a husband. In that capacity, as his helpmeet, she will bear and raise his children, feed as many children as God sends on whatever income he earns, may raise a garden and animals or run a home-based business [with his approval], may home birth and will certainly homeschool all of her ch … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ: How did you get yourself into this mess?

Jonathan W. Rice (jwr)In late 2009, I learned that a journalist had written a book about the Quiverfull movement.[1]  I ordered the book and also discovered an online forum for survivors and refugees who’d fled from it (No Longer Quivering).  As far back as 1989, I’d known several families who fit the description but could never really understand their rationale.  I hoped the NLQ forum and the book might shed some light on their beliefs. I was not disappointed.In mid-February 2010, a thread title on the forum caught my eye: How did you get yourself into this mess?  The author, a female refugee from the movement, was wondering how she and so many others could have fallen for it in the fi … [Read more...]


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