No choices of my own

by ErikaMy sister and I in the winter of 1991-1992, the year we started homeschooling It wasn't long before my parents got really frustrated with the church in town and wanted something different. My father told the pastor that we would be going down to the church in Bellows Falls (run by John Thompson) but would still come to services here and there at the church in town. The pastor felt frustrated at the time, too, so he gave my parents his blessing to attend this other church.I remember when the people at church found out that we wouldn't be attending regularly there anymore. Many were upset and felt offended. Quite a few voiced accusations that my parents only stayed long enough for … [Read more...]

A Most Twisted Love

by VyckieMom & Dad are in love ... but is a patriarchal relationship of entitlement-meets-martyrdom a healthy and mutually beneficial expression of love?Following a recent interview with the religion editor of our local newspaper, I've been thinking more about what I've learned from St. Bernard of Clairvaux concerning the four "degrees" of love which the ancient monk postulated in considering man's relationship to God (note that this applies to all other relationships as well) ~ although I've already written briefly on this topic here, I'd like to now give a more thorough explanation:Level 1) I love me for my benefit ~ here's an infantile, self-involved person with a severe … [Read more...]

Something didn’t sit quite right with me …

by Erika The morning that I left for my missions trip Boot Camp. I'm pictured with my pastor and his wife.A newspaper story that was done before I left for my missions trip.When I left for Africa in the summer of 1991, I was excited about my trip and the things that I would see but I was also disappointed to know that I would be coming home to my sophomore year as a homeschooler. I was crushed by my parents' decision and begged them to let me stay in school. After all, I wasn't the one that wanted to be taken out and I wasn't the one that had the problems in school. My parents told me that it was all or nothing. If they were taking out one kid, they were taking us all out. If my 3 … [Read more...]

It started with homeschooling

by ErikaMy sister and I in a photo booth. I think we were 12 & 13. She's older than I am.My childhood from the time I was born to the age of 14 was pretty much normal and mainstream. I grew up in a Christian home, going to church every Sunday, taking part in VBS in the summers, going to public school (though I went a few years to a Christian private school when I first started school), playing with the neighbor kids, watching cartoons in the morning....all the things that kids did in a normal family and neighborhood setting.I was born in Rhode Island at the end of 1976. I became a Christian at the age of 7. I remember sitting on the bed in my Oma and Opa's house (my grandparents … [Read more...]

Freedom From Patriarchy

by ErikaHere in the US, we celebrated our nation's independence and freedom this past Saturday, the 4th of July. This particular holiday always makes me think of my own Independence Day.We had a BBQ with family and friends this past Saturday and while we were sitting inside to stay out of the rain, I was telling my friends about the jumper that my sister had made for herself back when she was 18. I had recently posted the picture of our family on my Facebook account and one of my friends asked, "Does your sister really have a cow on her jumper?"Yes, she did.In fact, she had the whole farm SCENE. The field, the red barn, the fruit trees, the cows, etc. My mom, sisters and I all … [Read more...]

No-Win Scenario #3 ~ Women can't "have it all" but QF women can do it all

Me ~ Feb. 2007. Too exhausted to get out of bed ~ still, the work had to be done ... There's quite a discussion about feminism going on over on the NLQ forums ~ and it's got me thinking about another no-win situation for Quiverfull moms.As a faithful Proverbs 31 woman of God, I was very concerned about my reputation ~ not for the sake of what people thought about *me,* of course ~ because, you know ~ I was very careful not to seek the "approval of men rather than God." No ~ my reputation was important only because I cared about my witness ~ I did not want the Word of God "blasphemed" on account of my unsubmissive attitude towards my husband, which would be, of course ~ evidence of a … [Read more...]

Hey, Hazelle … about "that book…"

by VyckieFor her 13th birthday, I got Hazelle a ticket to Seattle ~ she'll be leaving tomorrow to spend Spring Break with Laura. When Laura lived here with us, she and Hazelle became pretty good friends ;-)This morning, about 5 minutes before leaving for school, Hazelle (who is a 6th grader) asked me to write a response to the letter/book report she wrote for me as a class assignment. I scribbled out a letter and she's off to school ~ here's what I wrote:Dear Hazelle,Thank you for the letter telling me about the book, The Giver ~ which you are reading in school.Back when we were home schooling and attending home church, I heard about a really terrible book (worse than Harry … [Read more...]

QUIVERFULL: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement ~ A Review

by VyckieThe reason I am telling my story now (as opposed to 10 years from now when my kids are grown up and I actually have time to write), is because I came across this article on Alternet and read with interest about the people and the teachings which our family had followed for many years. I was kind of amazed that someone on that liberal news site knew about this movement ~ so I posted a comment on the article ~ and that's how I got in touch with Kathryn Joyce, author of Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement.I pre-ordered the book and as I read it, I kept saying aloud, "I know these people!" All the names were familiar to me ~ Nancy Campbell, Mary Pride, Doug … [Read more...]

To Those Who May Be Shocked, Disappointed, and Hurt by the News of My Apostasy

by Vyckie Bennett (Garrison)This is a letter to those godly, dedicated Christians who know me (or know of me) from my articles and testimonies which have appeared in popular homeschool publications such as Above Rubies, An Encouraging Word, SALT, Unless the Lord, etc. ~ or who have followed news of our ever-growing family in my monthly column or in updates and prayer requests which I have posted on email groups such as MOMYS Digest, The Lord’s Heritage, FARBITM, and others. I have been an advocate of godly womanhood ~ I’ve encouraged fellow Christian moms in their Quiverfull convictions and have done my best to lead by example in my own family.This is a difficult letter for me to write ~ … [Read more...]


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