Quoting Quiverfull: Part 2 – Stop Making My 12 Year Old Stare?

by Matthew Jacobson from MatthewLJacobson.com - Modesty and What My 12 Year Old Son Has to do With How You Dressed TodayEditor's note: So typical that this guy makes it all about the wrong choices of everyone else instead of trying to teach his son not to stare, to take responsibility for where his eyes and thoughts roam. This type of thinking only continues to drive Rape Culture, treating women like objects to ejaculate to and men into little more than beasts unable to control their sex drives. Every woman in the world is not responsible for this kid's struggle with purity! … [Read more...]

It’s Not That Complicated: Part 4 Chapter 6

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideAll quotes from the book are in blue textLast section in Chapter Six!  Yay!Overarching Themes:You've probably become afraid of dressing attractively since you read the section on modesty. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Lying is A-Okay Biblical?

by InsanityBytes22 (one of Biblical Gender Roles many honeybadgers: ie one of the female commenters that pops up in his comments approving of every female-hating idea he posts) at her blog Insanity Bytes 2 -It's Okay to Fake it (Do Not Link linked)Editor's note: I will agree with her that good manners should happen, but if you've contemplated smothering your husband in the middle of the night perhaps being mannerly is not what needs to happen. Perhaps you should consider why you're feeling homicidal towards your spouse and work through that, or leave for his safety. Covering your feel with mouthing polite words merely wallpapers over dangerous volcanic feelings. Get help. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Cover Up You Temptress?

by Lisa Jacobson as reposted by Daughters of the King - Avert Your EyesEditor's note: We've shared this piece of shaming and blaming before, but it bears revisiting in light of the sexual scandals in many churches and the budding rape culture in the worlds of fundamentalism, evangelical and quiverfull Christianity.  What about teaching young men to not think of women's bodies as pieces of meat meant for sex or sexual temptation, and to treat them like genuine people? Do you think that might end this sort of torment for this poor kid if he wasn't hyper-sexualized by purity culture? … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: You Owe Your Husband Sex No Matter What?

by Biblical Gender Roles from Biblical Gender Roles - Is My Husband Raping Me?Trigger warning for rape culture justifications and excusing sexual abuseEditor's note: If you have to actually ask that question then usually the answer is yes. Gross disgusting everything is always about sex Mr. Biblical Gender Roles is answering a long comment some poor woman who's husband has frequent, painful and unwanted sex with her against her will. Basically the rest of his long, l-o-n-g answer to this woman is that her husband is within his rights to take sex from her no matter what the circumstances, including him blaming women for having ideas from 'Satan' that men have to earn their sexy fun … [Read more...]

I Dated Christian Grey

by Samantha Field cross posted from her blog Defeating The DragonsEditor's note: Samantha wrote an excellent piece with the same title for The Mary Sue - I Dated Christian Grey that sparked some thought provoking dialogue in the comments. Loved this bit: All of this is what happens in the early stages of any abusive relationship, especially with an abuser who uses “BDSM” to disguise his intentions. Victims are instructed by their abusers to view the abuse as normal, and normalcy asspecial. Anastasia Steele and I were so brave any time we dared to “stand up” to him, and Christian and my abuser were so unbelievably wonderful for having brief moments of normal human decency. The danger in  … [Read more...]

Christian Reconstruction, ATI, Abuse, & Submission: Modesty and Lust Part 5

by SJ Reidhead cross posted from her blog The Pink FlamingoI’m not a strong advocate for sex outside of marriage.  I am certainly no advocate for adultery, which I think is wrong.  It’s one of the Ten Big Ones, as in Thou Shalt Not.  But, fornication, which is sex between individuals who are not married either to one another, or anyone else, is not considered a major sin.  I do think, though, it is an invitation to complicate one’s life.  That’s why I avoid the subject, and the process.  It’s complicated, complicating, and just tends to get in the way of life.  Maybe that’s a cop-out, but I have enough problems right now.  I don’t need to deal with the emotional ups and downs of an involv … [Read more...]

Cersei Lannister, Rape Culture, and a Lot of Me Flipping the Bird in General

by Samantha Field cross posted from her blog Defeating The DragonsTrigger Warning: Sexual violence I’ve read G. R. R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire up through Feast of Crows, and I’m currently reading Dance of Dragons, albeit slowly. The books are a struggle for me to read, as an abuse and rape survivor. I do enjoy them, although I caution people to engage with Martin’s world critically. He’s been hailed by a lot of people as a “feminist” writer, but I am extremely hesitant to think of him in those terms (read Sady Doyle’s piece there– it’s both hysterically funny and insightful). … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Is This How You Should Speak About Your Spouse?

by Spencer Harmon from his blog Unspoken - My Wife Has Tattoos: Marriage, New Birth and the GospelThis has been all over the internet this weekend, provoking many different reactions: some people thinking it's awesome and those that think it's awful. Someone on our NLQ Support group on Facebook said it should have been titled 'King Cophetua meets Beggar Maid' What do you think dear readers? … [Read more...]

What Is Rape Culture?

by Suzanne Calulu cross posted from her blog True Love Doesn't RapeBuzzfeed.com had an awesome article today laying out exactly what Rape Culture actually is. They even had photos to illustrate the problem and that song by Robin Thicke that is a perfect example of rape culture and the lack of informed consent - Blurred Lines.If you haven't seen the video or heard the song here it is. Not safe for work. … [Read more...]


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