The next link in the chain towards Quiverfull

by KathrynI'm 27, and grew up in a military household as an only child. My mother was raised Church of Christ, and converted to Assemblies of God in her teens. My father was raised atheist, as near as I can tell, and converted to marry my mother. They married around 20, I guess, and I was born when Mother was 28. She said I was her miracle baby, that she had been diagnosed as infertile, unable to carry a baby to term. It had sent her into a near suicidal depression. I think the only reason she didn't try suicide was because suicide is a sin. According to her, that all went away when I was born.Because of the military moving us, I went to three different kindergartens. In first grade, I … [Read more...]

Everybody's dying to know!

by VyckieA friend and I were talking rather excitedly about my upcoming guest appearance on the Joy Behar Show.  We were chattering away when she suddenly asked me, "How are you going to respond if Joy asks you what you believe about religion now?"Well, to tell the truth, I was stumped.  I mean, I do have an answer to that question, but the minute my friend asked me about it, my brain froze up and I couldn't think of a thing to say. Oh no, I thought ~ what if I get totally stuck during the interview?  I'd better be prepared!  I'm sure I won't get a chance to to tell it all ~ but just for practice ~ and since I've been told that, "Everybody's dying to know!" ~ here's the summary that I … [Read more...]

You're only cool if you're wearing the right headcovering….

by ErikaWhen my family moved to Pennsylvania in 1993, it wasn't long before my father decided that the women in his house had to wear headcoverings. We had started attending Charity Christian Fellowship (where their sign says, "Everyone Welcome," but which I often wanted to graffiti underneath, "But not everyone accepted") and it was very clear that if you didn't have the "right" headcovering, you were "different."I was never quite accepted with my bold and bright bandanas and my bright purple snood. I was looked at with a sneer by most people, the girls kept their distance and there was no chance in hell I would ever be looked at romantically by one of the young men. My headcoverings … [Read more...]

Women leaving lifestyles such as these are truly strong, amazing women

by redheadedskepticIf you haven’t read Vyckie’s story, you should definitely check it out! She and her family participated in the Quiverfull lifestyle for many years before getting out. If you like my story, you’ll definitely like hers. Every time I read a post, I shiver with how so very close I came to falling into this trap. I’ve said before, if the right boy had caught my eye any time from 13-21 (if I hadn’t met and married Bob at 20), I would have succumbed. Even though we weren’t strictly quiverfull, many of the same things she thought and said to her children were the same things said to me. At one point, my mother bought into the quiverfull idea, but not enough to get a reverse tub … [Read more...]

No Turning Back

by TapatiTapati's altar I was asked recently if I felt there was any hope that I might someday renew my desire to serve and unite with Krishna and engage in kirtan with others of a like mind in a non-denominational, low pressure environment. Following that, I was asked what I missed about the Hare Krishna Movement. Others wondered why I kept my initiated name, Tapati and made it my legal name.I can imagine that my spiritual path seems confusing. From outside it might look like I have worshiped more than one God in my life: The Trinity of Catholicism, Krishna, myriad Goddesses, and Kuan Yin.What I have been doing from my perspective is sorting through different cultural viewpoints … [Read more...]

Anything you can do, I can do in a skirt!

by SierraYoung women following the patriarchal doctrine of William Branham’s “Message of the Hour” liked to refer to themselves as the “skirt girls.” Skirts and dresses were the only attire sufficiently modest and feminine for young ladies raised in the shadow of the prophet. Hemlines had to fall below the knees – and stay below them when the wearer was sitting down. Hair often besieged the knees from above, making them a kind of modesty battleground that should never, ever catch a gleam of daylight. Tanned knees were the mark of a harlot. As a little girl, I didn’t mind it much. I was convinced that my wrinkly knees were unsightly and ought to be hidden in the first place. What was I com … [Read more...]

A Friend's Perspective

by ErikaLike most kids that are taken out of public school and start homeschooling, and whose families dive head first into patriarchy and fundamentalism, friendships that these kids have end up fizzling out with "old friends" as parents tighten the reigns. Sometimes, friendships are cut off altogether.I found myself in the position of my parents tryng to wean me away from my friends and because many of my friends didn't understand what was truly happening in our home, they became uncomfortable and confused around us and our parents and eventually, they just stopped calling and coming around. I found myself thinking that I was out of sight, so I must have been out of mind, too. As a … [Read more...]

Will use your book in my college class

Vyckie,I have been reading your posts- actually soaking it all up like a sponge might be a better way of putting it. I am a college instructor and graduate student, finishing up my PhD in sociology at NC State. I have, for the most part, avoided the topic of religion with my students here in the Bible Belt. I just wanted to let you know that when you publish your book I will have my students buy it and read it. I support your endeavor. You do a phenomenal job of explaining the appeal of the QF movement and the ups/downs of a patriarchal culture. You analyze your own emotions amazingly well and connect everything to capitalism, your traumatic childhood, and so many sociological … [Read more...]

Shutting Off My Brain ~ Part 2

by JourneyWhen we got back from our honeymoon, it was so exciting to set up our new apartment on our Bible College campus. The "married dorms" seemed so big and grown-up, and I put those thoughts about our honeymoon behind me...until Mark told me the news that “God” had told him I needed to give away my car.He said were going to be a one-car couple, and that one car was going to be his old van. This was brand new news to me. I was shocked. What? I tried to bargain with him, but he would hear none of it. Again, he was the male, therefore the one who was supposed to be the “leader,” so though I pleaded, I had no choice but to do what he wanted.The books and the teachings all sai … [Read more...]

12 Good Things I Learned From Being In (and Leaving) a Christian Cult: A Christian Perspective

by krwordgazerI am one of those who left a fundamentalist Christian coercive religious organization while remaining a Christian. I realized not long ago that there are many constructive things I believe and act on today, learned (often the hard way!) from my experiences there. But I think I'm a wiser person, and probably a better Christian, than I used to be, and though it doesn't take away the painful memories, it does help me to feel that the perspective I've gained is valuable, to me and to my loved ones.Here are my 12 bits of wisdom:1. I can't let someone else tell me what to believe. I must read and learn what the Bible says for myself, with a mind to context, the original … [Read more...]


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