Why Quiverfull Moms Do Not and Cannot Love Their Bodies

by VyckieI beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. (Romans 12:1)For the past week and a half, NLQ has been presenting the excellent material in Tapati's Body Image Workshop.  As I've read through the posts and all the related comments on the NLQ forum, I've been thinking about how the Body Image issue is incredibly relevant to No Longer Quivering and the stories here of women who've left the Quiverfull philosophy and lifestyle.In theory, virtuous Quivefull moms do not have body image issues.  I say this because, of course, there is no "you" in qivering ~ in o … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Lines

by TapatiI remember the lines. You remember the lines. Team captains dividing us into the more or less worthy as we stood waiting for our doom. Nervous laughter accompanying some of the choices. The smell of perspiration pervading the gym as tension mounted and fewer of us remained to be chosen. No one wanted to be last. It was embarrassing enough to be among the last few. We would sell out our best friend rather than be chosen last. We promised God anything if only we would not be last.Sometimes the worst happened, and I would be the last one chosen. In that position I was supposed to act "cool," as if it didn't really matter to me. Over time, from this and other similarly humiliating … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: The View From Both Sides Of The Easel

by TapatiThe Model: Five years ago I would have laughed at the suggestion I might be doing nude modeling for an artist. Nothing could have been further from my mind. I was only beginning to work on changing my body image. I was just beginning to appreciate my wide hips, powerful buttocks, smallish breasts, and round belly with its network of stretch marks like ribbons of fine silk. The only parts of my body I had always liked were my blue-green eyes and my soft, thick brown hair.It was a major step just to go to a beach or a pool in a swimsuit. First I had to know that I deserve access to the water just as much as any thin person. Then I had to use that knowledge as a shield when I … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Day Four Assignment

by TapatiThis assignment is meant to be interactive. It is a guided visualization followed by discussion or journal writing. You can handle this either by having someone read it to you, going slowly enough for you to visualize, or you can record it and then play it back for yourself. Before you do the visualization exercise, please start by getting into a comfortable position and relaxing with some slow, deep breaths. The concept for this exercise originated with Marcia Hutchinson although I am writing this version myself. You should check out her book, Transforming Body Image, for this and other wonderful body image enhancing activities! … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Taking Care of Ourselves

by Tapati1) Make a list of ten things you would do if you really loved your body. Pick one and start doing it now. As you progress you can choose other things from the list. This is an especially powerful exercise for those women who have been waiting to do nearly everything "until I lose those pounds."2) Create a support system of friends who support you in loving the body you have now. You may find that your circle of friends shifts as you seek out people who are supportive and leave behind people who won't accept your limits on negative body talk or diet propaganda. This requires a commitment to yourself--you realize that you deserve acceptance and won't settle for less.3) Surround … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Day Three Assignment

by TapatiThis one can be a quick brainstorm for most of you--it's the second step that will take more time.Make a list of ten things you would like to do if you had your ideal body that you aren't doing now. Most of us do have a picture in mind of what our ideal body would look like--plus or minus x pounds, minus the scar, with a little more or less height, younger/older, different hair or features--and we imagine we'd be more confident and take more risks or do different things if we looked like our ideal image.In the case of illness or loss of certain abilities this can be more challenging, of course. There are literally some things you may not be able to do.Step 2 is to pick one … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Playlist

Body Image Playlistby TapatiBeautiful by Christina AguileraMahbootay by Laura LoveVideo by Indie ArieGirl Next Door and Imperfection by Saving JaneAt Seventeen by Janis IanWhy do you love me? or Bleed like me by GarbageCrazy by Simple PlanUnpretty by TLCPerfectly Flawed by OtepFat Boy by BizarreBaby Got Back by Sir Mixalot (ok, yes this is funny but those of us with large butts were really happy to have a veritable anthem!) … [Read more...]

Tapati's Body Image Workshop: Why Body Image Matters

by TapatiMy involvement with the issue of body image came out of my encounter with the size acceptance movement in the late 1980s. I was fortunate enough to meet Ruah Bull, a body image educator. I had never heard of such a thing but soon I was exposed to her classes at Cabrillo College in Aptos, California. She had studied with body image guru Marcia Hutchinson and had joined with other large women to form a radical group that occasionally defaced billboards with thin models and went out to eat together in public—always a radical act for a large woman. They encouraged each other to wear sexy clothing and supported each other’s efforts to throw off inhibitions that they’d absorbed in our l … [Read more...]