But In The Parish Hall, He Be All Like …

Look. Let’s just be real. It’s easy to be a Christian in church for 2 hours a Sunday – right? Oh sure, some places Liturgy is only an hour and a half – others longer – who knows, you may show up late … Less time being “Christian” is even easier, n’cest pas? And gossip … well, that’s not so easy in the church (but it can be done). Gossip is best served up in the Hall, after the service.

But everyone can agree:  It’s pretty easy to be good in church.

Take for instance Molly. Molly is a relatively new convert to Orthodox Christianity; she’s a student, struggling to make her way in the world. She loves the Liturgy.

But, in the Parish Hall, She be all like …

Then there’s Hank – or, as he’s known to his Orthodox friends, Polyeuctos. He can’t seem to hold a job, but he does tie prayer ropes to sell in the church bookstore. His own prayer rope is big enough to fit around his waist …

During the Liturgy, Hank doesn’t move – head inclined toward his heart, eyes shut, prayer rope slowly slipping through the fingers of his left hand. The hair, the beard, the black pants and shirt. He’s got the look.

But in the Parish Hall, Hank be all like …

Then there’s the priest! In the Church, of course, he be all like:

PEACE BE TO ALL!

Then Father So-n-So walks into the Parish Hall, and he be all like:

Listen …

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