On Being Evangelized

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I can usually spot them when they come in. The "superchristians". The excessively patronizing men make the order while the women stand quietly in their long skirts behind them. The group of middle aged women who come in for their bible study, order each of their drinks individually, and never ever tip.Or the conservatively fashionable woman who takes forever to make up her mind what she wants, and then when she decides on an herbal tea for it’s health benefits, she plucks up her courage and shakily makes her evangelistic comment about how amazing it is that god has made tea.One time I spotted a middle aged couple sitting rigidly next to each other across from their long-haired  adult … [Read more...]

Shame and Hospitality

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Haley had scheduled the get-together a week in advance. I knew all about it. And then we both forgot.Haley called me at 4 in the afternoon, “Do you remember that we have people coming over at 6?” My whole day came crashing down.We hadn’t cleaned the house that weekend, because no one was feeling that well. There was a mountain of laundry in the kitchen in front of the wash machine, and the sink was full of dishes. Toys were scattered throughout the house along with used tissues from all the snotty noses. I had nothing on hand to serve a guest. I wanted to cry.I snapped at the kids, I turned up the radio and buckled down to cleaning as fast as I could. I cleaned up the bathroom, mo … [Read more...]

“Natural”

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 There is a Christian arguement against being gay that claims it is "unnatural". You know, Men and Women belong together. Heterosexuality is the normal natural way to be. Tab A fits perfectly into Slot B and all that. The argument is that most people are straight, gay people are just a small percentage of people who have fallen into unnatural desires.Conservative Catholics in particular love this “natural law” argument, because they feel that it is non-religious in nature, and therefore in their mind applies to everyone. And yet, growing up as a conservative Christian, I was told to be different, part of a peculiar people, to stand out from the crowd and avoid the majority cultur … [Read more...]

Spanking and Unconditional Love

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I wrote in several of my childhood journals that I would never spank my kids. The shame and frustration I had experienced was enough to convince me it was ineffective and harmful. But somehow by the time I was an adult I had changed my position again. Part of my reason was the major denial of any issues in my childhood. I felt like acknowledging painful things from my past would be a betrayal of my parents, and I loved them and wanted to be loyal to them. So I continued to pretend that nothing had ever been wrong, and tried to prove that to myself.  I was also a very conservative Christian, and every parenting book I read was written from that punitive perspective. One of them was “To Train u … [Read more...]

Why I used to be afraid of Universal Health Care

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So, my post on health care has been getting some attention, (I encourage you to go read the diverse comments left over there) and the main question I seem to be getting again and again, is HOW did you get those fears of Universal Health care in the first place? First of all, when I describe myself as a die-hard republican, believe me I was. For my first election in 2004 I voted for Bush, and a few weeks before moving to Canada I voted for McCain. I believed that abortion was always wrong in every case, I believed that “gay marriage” was wrong, I believed that welfare programs were unnecessary because if every woman just got married to one man and he supported her and her kids there would nev … [Read more...]

Equal but Different Vs Equal means Equal

Just a few weeks back Rachel Held Evans (a fantastic christian blogger) put together a week of posts on the topic of Complementarianism and Egalitarianism. She called it the week of Mutuality, and many people participated in writing their own thoughts on women, marriage and church. There were so many posts linked at her synchro blog it was overwhelming, and with my 4 kids and super slow computer I had no time to read all of them. But I wanted to share the stories and ideas that leapt out at me. I urge you to go and read the rest of these posts, I have just linked a small portion of them which can only give a partial view of the great ideas and conversations going on here.Here in her post … [Read more...]


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