Jessa Duggar’s Happily Ever After

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So Jessa Duggar is officially courting and seeing the headlines on news sites and the links people were sharing made me feel nauseous. Reading the articles where they are portrayed as a young couple making a quaint and cute (albeit different) choice when it comes to romance. And then reading the comments where clueless person after clueless person gushes admiration for the “values” and praises them for being “role models.” My heart rate goes up. I close my laptop. I try not to think about it, but still end up feeling vaguely sad. Because I know the rest of the story, I lived it.I know the stuff that the news articles and the commenters don’t know. How a girl in this movement is told thro … [Read more...]

Happy Birthday Haley

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We’ve been together eight years babe, and boy has it been a ride. A facebook group started a thread where we could list 5 favorite things about our partner, and since it’s your birthday I thought I’d put it here to surprise you too. Lets see, what are my favorite things about you… You are Passionate- You know your truth and you will stand up for it. You believe in me and support me to the hilt. You want to be there for our kids, so you pour yourself into caring for them. You have never been one to just say stuff, you follow through in real, visible, consistent ways. When you get interested in something, you think about it, often pacing across the room, and spinning around to pace back. And … [Read more...]

Oblivious to Privilege: Part One

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A guest post from Haley...I’ve lived with society perceiving me in different ways over my lifetime.At one time I was perceived to be a straight white cisgender male (now obviously I was really a closeted transgender woman but the world didn't know that.) In the year before I gender transitioned, I pushed gender boundaries, my style was fairly genderqueer and many people perceived me to be a gay male. Then during the first six months of living as a woman as the hormones started and a learning curve happened, I was regularly visibly identified to be a transgender woman. And for the last six months as my transition has progressed  I “pass” and the world perceives me to be a white woman, … [Read more...]

On Growing Older

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This post was written by my wife Haley.Today I read a book titled, “In Our Mothers’ house.” (The title means mothers plural, even Word wants to be heterosexist and change it to “Mother’s” house.) This book tells the story about a lesbian couple through their lifespan as an elementary school children’s book. The story picks up with a lesbian couple adopting three kids and ends with those kids grown and eventually burying their moms after they got old and died. I couldn’t help but get teary eyed as I read the book to my five year old daughter. I found the story so beautiful. I saw a glimpse of me and my wife growing old together and how after raising our own four kids, we’d someday probably … [Read more...]

Your Vote Affects Real People

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Four years ago, I reached my second presidential election and voted for John McCain. I thought I knew why I picked who I did, and I had many reasons I thought that it was important to vote Republican. If there was one issue that I felt was most important, it would have been the social side to politics, first and foremost abortion rights, and by that I mean I was against abortion. I considered myself strongly pro-life, and I even bragged about being a one issue voter. I have since come to question many of the “pro-life” assumptions I made at the time, Libby Ann gives a great breakdown of some of the questions surrounding this issue here.Regardless of why I voted for John McCain, I started … [Read more...]

Another Day in the Life…

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 I get home from my job at midnight. After being on my feet for 7 hours, it felt really good to sit in the car for the short ride home and I stumble a little on the way to the kitchen door.  Mr. Punk is asleep on the living room floor with his little butt in the air, face smashed into his favorite soft blanket. I plunk into a chair and peel off my boots.  Haley gives me a mug of orange juice with pulp (my favorite) and we sit down to eat a snack together.  We talk softly about how my shift went; I made cereal bars and cookie dough and lasagna and had some fun conversations with my co-worker. We laugh when I realize that this is basically the first social interaction I’ve ever had other than c … [Read more...]


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