Yes I buy ice cream with my food stamps.

531754_384906591563512_199317244_n

When we were on the brink of transition, and facing the prospect of losing our income and home, we spent a lot of time crunching numbers. How much money would we need to survive for 3 months with no income? How about 6 months? We added up the costs for rent, insurance gas and upkeep for our 13 year old van, utilities, our life insurance policies, and diapers. And one of the costs I always included in my calculations was food.It never even occurred to me to get food stamps. That was something “lazy” people got, who “didn’t work” and “lived off the government”.  Even when times were tight in the past, we put food expenses on our credit card, never even considering that we might qualify for … [Read more...]

Learning Humility

mattress_lead

We got a mattress.It’s the first big ticket purchase we’ve made in a long time so it’s kind of a big deal.The delivery guys were coming between 9 and 12 on Saturday to drop it off. This was good. I don’t work Saturday, Haley does, but I usually take advantage of an entire day where I am not tired from already working an eight hour shift on my feet to get some cleaning done.And then they showed up at 9:14, when I had just finished feeding everyone breakfast and getting them all dressed and barely started picking up. I let them in, and showed them our bedroom down the hall. One of them was sweet, he smiled, gave the kids mints, and didn’t seem to mind stepping around the piles of la … [Read more...]

Malpractice on the Air

1701-1252778335sH8n

It was almost midnight and I was driving home after my usual shift. Yawning, I pushed the radio button hoping to catch a peppy song to keep me awake, but the station that usually plays pop music had one of those call-in counseling shows on. “Hello Brooke, so you are 19 and pregnant?”“Yes, unexpectedly so.”“Wow, you’re going to be a mom.”“Yeah, I’m excited, but nervous, because I don’t have a lot of support ya know?”  I fumbled with the dial, trying to change the channel before I got sucked in, but it was too late.  “Don’t you have family?” The host asked.“Well, they don’t really want to be a part of my life.”“Oh, that’s sad, why not?”“Well, they th … [Read more...]

Shame and Hospitality

steam-rising-from-cup-of-hot-tea

Haley had scheduled the get-together a week in advance. I knew all about it. And then we both forgot.Haley called me at 4 in the afternoon, “Do you remember that we have people coming over at 6?” My whole day came crashing down.We hadn’t cleaned the house that weekend, because no one was feeling that well. There was a mountain of laundry in the kitchen in front of the wash machine, and the sink was full of dishes. Toys were scattered throughout the house along with used tissues from all the snotty noses. I had nothing on hand to serve a guest. I wanted to cry.I snapped at the kids, I turned up the radio and buckled down to cleaning as fast as I could. I cleaned up the bathroom, mo … [Read more...]

“Natural”

12856091441664175474right-way-wrong-way-md

 There is a Christian arguement against being gay that claims it is "unnatural". You know, Men and Women belong together. Heterosexuality is the normal natural way to be. Tab A fits perfectly into Slot B and all that. The argument is that most people are straight, gay people are just a small percentage of people who have fallen into unnatural desires.Conservative Catholics in particular love this “natural law” argument, because they feel that it is non-religious in nature, and therefore in their mind applies to everyone. And yet, growing up as a conservative Christian, I was told to be different, part of a peculiar people, to stand out from the crowd and avoid the majority cultur … [Read more...]

It really wasn’t that long ago

6def4945-cc90-4fc8-89ba-6c4f82671681

Does this look familiar to you? I remember seeing Lucy get spanked by Ricki, and I didn't even grow up with a television, so it must have been in the few episodes I saw as a kid. It was always treated as humorous, with Lucy making faces and the audience laughing. I never witnessed a fully adult woman get spanked in real life, but scenes like this didn't shock me. Lucy was "bad" and Ricki was reacting to her badness by teaching her a lesson, showing her her proper place. I didn't think it was strange that the show never featured Lucy spanking Ricki for laughs. I remember seeing The Quiet Man with John  Wayne and Maureen O Hara where he drags his wife for several miles and … [Read more...]


CLOSE | X

HIDE | X