Quick Takes #36: Home Alone Edition

1.My computer was running more and more slowly. Then I started getting weird messages about how my hard drive was gone (but it wasn't). And finally my computer started shutting itself down and/or redirecting me to random cooking and decorating websites when I was online. So I knew that I had to give up on my attempts to self-medicate and just bring it in for repairs. (I've since found out that this probably relates to a spam email I accidentally opened way back when, apparently they really do give your computer viruses.) Of course this also happened to be the week that my husband was gone on business, and the kids and I all got colds and couldn't go anywhere. So I was at … [Read more...]

On Life, Love, and Joy

We went to the grocery store as a family. My husband had the older 2 kids in his cart, and I had the 2 year old in mine and the baby in the sling. It always fun wandering through the store. We split up to go grab different items, and meet up in the middle of aisles to re-group and check items off the list. We each end up adding a special treat of some kind of our cart, and we usually forget to pick up something we needed. We often stop by at the crab tank, not because we eat crab, just to hear the delighted shrieks of our kids as they watch the “cwab bugs” skitter around the tank. We always run through the bakery and pick up a free cookie before we head to the check-out line. Since I am obs … [Read more...]

Why I Blog

Sorry about the unannounced shutdown. As those of you that follow me on facebook and Twitter already know, my blog got discovered by someone I knew in real life, and it was already spreading.I knew it was bound to happen at some point, it’s kind of hard to disguise some of the unique features my story. I had no game plan on what to do if my blog was discovered, so when I got the news that people from back home could be reading I immediately locked Permission to Live to give myself some time to think.In many ways it was frustrating to know my anonymity was gone, this has been a safe place for me to organize my thoughts and process my issues for almost 2 years now. Part of me was tempted to s … [Read more...]

Spiritualizing the Night

I’ve talked before about how night time parenting is a particularly hard challenge for me. It seems no matter how long I do it, I will never quite get used to snapping out of deep sleep and being able to be a nice person right away. But recently I’ve noticed a change in my patience levels during these night time escapades.I have 2 high needs babies in a row. Ms Drama and Ms Pooky are the sort of babies who have always been restless sleepers, and often need to be comforted by mom. If they had a rough day, if they didn’t eat well, if they aren’t feeling too good, etc. Chances are they will wake up at least once during the night.Back when I was a full-blown Christian, I used to beli … [Read more...]

Kiddie antics and quotes

It's been a while since I updated on the cute and silly stuffmy kids have been saying and doing, so here you go.3 month old Baby Boy recently started rolling over from back to tummy, hasn't figured out the whole tummy to back part yet, and he still tends to get his arm stuck underneath him when rolling, which infuriates him. He is very strong, and scared me recently by pulling a pillow across the bed towards him during nap time. (Pillows are now kept far away from him when sleeping!) He is also very vocal. He talks and talks when you encourage him a bit, he even talks while nursing (which makes for some milky bubbly conversations). I have no idea what he's … [Read more...]

The Rights of a Child: Part 2

After writing my rant last night, I’ve been thinking that this post may deserve more clarification. Several months ago, my mom was spouting off against the government and Child Protective Services in a phone conversation, saying that they should never have a right to "break up families" and I pointed out that while some families need to be separated, most of the time the family is just helped and educated, not split up. I recalled a certain time in our family when I feel that Child Protective Services would have been helpful. She acknowledged that there had been a problem, but maintained that she would have listened to a church member or neighbour if they had confronted her. I … [Read more...]