Yes I buy ice cream with my food stamps.

When we were on the brink of transition, and facing the prospect of losing our income and home, we spent a lot of time crunching numbers. How much money would we need to survive for 3 months with no income? How about 6 months? We added up the costs for rent, insurance gas and upkeep for our 13 year old van, utilities, our life insurance policies, and diapers. And one of the costs I always included in my calculations was food.... Read more

Butch, Femme, Style, and Developing a Sense of Self

  I remember climbing up the fence to scramble onto the roof, sometimes holding the hem of my skirt between my teeth while I climbed helped to keep it out of the way. I remember sitting in the apple tree reading my book, and how I jumped down and a branch hooked onto the hem and ripped a 2 foot gash in my skirt. My younger brother had a pair of combat boots that I would wear sometimes, just around... Read more

Happy Birthday Haley

We’ve been together eight years babe, and boy has it been a ride. A facebook group started a thread where we could list 5 favorite things about our partner, and since it’s your birthday I thought I’d put it here to surprise you too. Lets see, what are my favorite things about you… You are Passionate- You know your truth and you will stand up for it. You believe in me and support me to the hilt. You want to... Read more

Learning Humility

We got a mattress. It’s the first big ticket purchase we’ve made in a long time so it’s kind of a big deal. The delivery guys were coming between 9 and 12 on Saturday to drop it off. This was good. I don’t work Saturday, Haley does, but I usually take advantage of an entire day where I am not tired from already working an eight hour shift on my feet to get some cleaning done. And then they showed... Read more

Substance and Spice

  I worked second shift for 8 months. 30+ hours a week, going to bed at 1 in the morning, getting up to watch the kids during the day, and going to work as soon as evening arrived. 2 months ago, I had the chance to switch to daytime hours, so I did. And the deal came with full-time hours and a decent raise to boot. So now I get up early, work 8 hours and come home before my... Read more

Guest Post at Homeschooler’s Anonymous

  So it’s been over two months since my last post, and I hope to write about what has been going on lately soon. In the meantime, I have dipped my toes back into the writing world by writing a piece for Homeschoolers Anonymous. They are having a homeschooled LGBTQ week, so be sure to check out the stories of other people who grew up homeschooled and queer, or grew up opposing gay rights and later became allies. If you read the posts prior... Read more

Oblivious to Privilege:Part Two

Part Two of Haley’s Guest Post… The experience of living in two genders and perceived to have different sexual orientations, has made me aware of privilege and how oblivious I once was to it. I don’t share my experiences as some guilt trip to people who possess privilege or to paint a picture that my life is really hard. My life is really great. I am living freely and openly. I wake up and I look forward to what the... Read more

Oblivious to Privilege: Part One

A guest post from Haley… I’ve lived with society perceiving me in different ways over my lifetime. At one time I was perceived to be a straight white cisgender male (now obviously I was really a closeted transgender woman but the world didn’t know that.) In the year before I gender transitioned, I pushed gender boundaries, my style was fairly genderqueer and many people perceived me to be a gay male. Then during the first six months of living as... Read more

Malpractice on the Air

It was almost midnight and I was driving home after my usual shift. Yawning, I pushed the radio button hoping to catch a peppy song to keep me awake, but the station that usually plays pop music had one of those call-in counseling shows on. “Hello Brooke, so you are 19 and pregnant?” “Yes, unexpectedly so.” “Wow, you’re going to be a mom.” “Yeah, I’m excited, but nervous, because I don’t have a lot of support ya know?”   I... Read more

On Being Evangelized

I can usually spot them when they come in. The “superchristians”. The excessively patronizing men make the order while the women stand quietly in their long skirts behind them. The group of middle aged women who come in for their bible study, order each of their drinks individually, and never ever tip. Or the conservatively fashionable woman who takes forever to make up her mind what she wants, and then when she decides on an herbal tea for it’s health... Read more
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