Your Vote Affects Real People

Four years ago, I reached my second presidential election and voted for John McCain. I thought I knew why I picked who I did, and I had many reasons I thought that it was important to vote Republican. If there was one issue that I felt was most important, it would have been the social side to politics, first and foremost abortion rights, and by that I mean I was against abortion. I considered myself strongly pro-life, and I even bragged about being a one issue voter. I have since come to question many of the “pro-life” assumptions I made at the time, Libby Ann gives a great breakdown of some of the questions surrounding this issue here.Regardless of why I voted for John McCain, I started … [Read more...]

Policing the Potty

Some months back Haley and I watched the popular movie “The Help”. Throughout the movie (which focuses on the role of black women in the southern  united states in the 1960's) There is this ongoing discussion about people of color using the same bathrooms as people with white skin. People talk about being well-to-do enough to build a separate bathroom for the negro help, there is talk of how “black people have diseases” that white people don’t want to contract, and there is even a scene where a black maid locks herself in the bathroom while her white boss screams outside the door in a panic over her bathroom being used by a colored person.It is stunning how backwards this mentality was. I … [Read more...]

Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner?

I’ve said before that I don't like this phrase. I think hate is a really strong word, and it is hard to hate one aspect of someone without it bleeding into the way you treat that person. Hate (to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; to detest, despise or loathe) and Love (a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. fondness, predilection, warmth) are antonyms, I simply cannot see how they can be in the same sentence together, or refer to the same person. There some beliefs and some deeds that I truly do hate. I feel that they cause major damage, harm real people, and disregard humanity. However, I have p … [Read more...]

Mama Health: Motivation for Self-care

Before we moved, life was complicated. My spouse was working in a non-accepting environment and I dreaded going to church every Sunday. But apart from that, I had never felt so healthy in all my life. My marriage was amazing, my parenting relationship to my kids was being transformed more and more, my confidence was growing by the day it seemed. Since moving I’ve felt it slip a little. Moving is exhausting, and sometimes I was less than the parent I wanted to be. The week we came out to family, my body freaked out. I had sores in my mouth, and came down with the worst case of mastitis I’ve ever had. Telling family about the parts of our life that we knew they would not understand, was scary a … [Read more...]

When You Are Everything You Were Taught to Hate

A first time guest post written by my partner and spouse, Haley.In the recent wake of North Carolina Amendment One to ban same-sex marriage; CNN had Tony Perkins the president of the Family Research Council, an evangelical think tank and political lobbyist group in Washington, D.C., on their show. The CNN host asked the 49-year-old father of five how he might handle one of his children being gay: “Well we would have a conversation about it,” answered the guest. “I doubt that would happen with my children as we are teaching them the right ways that they are to interact as human beings.”I’ve got very bad news for Tony Perkins. I grew up the right way. My parents honestly could have been the pos … [Read more...]

Guest Post: Pray Together or Stay Together

 “So you were a Christian when you married him, and now you’re not sure?” We were sitting outside our classroom, chatting during our break. My new friend had been asking me for marriage advice, and now things were going suddenly wrong. I shrugged off her accusatory tone and pressed on.“Yes” I replied, “It’s been hard, but it’s also been a growing experience. We’ve learned a lot about each other and about…” She interrupted me.“So you basically pretended to be a Christian for just long enough to get a good guy and then immediately gave up your faith?” I think I should have gotten angry, but instead I just felt sick. “Of course not! I would never have chosen to add so much pain to my life.” … [Read more...]