40+ And The Church / Creating A Culture Of Maturity

coffee hour

In my earlier posts in this series, I queried pastors and church leaders about their experience pastoring those over 40. (Click here if you'd like to have a peek at those posts.) Those responsible for shepherding their congregations are stretched in dozens of different directions on any given day. A discussion about how to effectively minister to older congregants may sound as though I'm suggesting adding another half-dozen tasks to that impossible to-do list. As several respondents to that … [Read more...]

Review: Forgiving Our Fathers And Mothers

forgiving

I can count on one hand the number of adults I've known who have not had to work through some level of hurt, neglect, abuse, or emotional disconnect they're carrying with them from childhood. Even the most well-intentioned, fully-present parents don't always get it right with their kids. (Hand raised.) However, the notion of children forgiving mothers and fathers whose issues suffocated their ability to parent those children responsibly may seem both excruciating and foolish. Unforgiveness can … [Read more...]

“Or It Could Go Like This…” – On Re-Leashing Imagination

short leash

Maybe ten years ago, I participated in a small playwriting workshop led by a man who'd directed a number of Broadway plays in the 1960's and 1970's. (For the life of me, I can not remember his name at this moment.) Each workshop participant read the short scene he or she had brought to the class. I was feeling pretty great about the script I'd created, frankly. The workshop leader smiled and nodded appreciatively as I read. Obviously my positive feelings about my own work were being mirrored … [Read more...]

Raised In A Christian Cult

If you've ever been stuck in traffic caused by drivers slowing down to get a glimpse of the accident scene, you know we humans are a nosy bunch. So it's no surprise that readers have devoured a steady stream of recent memoirs penned by people who grew up in abusive, controlling fundamentalist sects. We curiously peek into the barbed-wire edges of different faith traditions—Jewish,Mormon, and Christian—from the perspectives of their former members. While the theology may differ, the … [Read more...]

Review: Jesus Feminist

jesus feminist

One of the benefits of being a Patheos blogger is the opportunity to participate in a book club-themed conversation about a particular book during a certain two-week or so time period. It's interesting to get a lot of different perspectives from a variety of good thinkers on an author's work. If you decide to purchase the book in question for yourself, you'll bring all the questions and insights from book club bloggers into the pages as you read it. If you don't choose to read the book, the … [Read more...]

40+ And The Church/Pastoring Those In Second Adulthood

shepherd

Last May, after hearing from more than 400 people over the age of 40 about the nature of their relationship with a local church, I made these observations: Church leaders must do some serious thinking about their models for spiritual health, growth and church “success”. Yes, I know there are hundreds of people speaking and writing about how and why to do this, all promoting their specific fix for the problems of our churches (Be missional! Be multi-site! Formal liturgy/modern worship/yada … [Read more...]

The Unfortunate Art of Female Self-Sabotage

Iwas surprised when my friend was terminated from an organization where we both worked for several years. She was a hard worker—always first to volunteer to do thankless tasks and the last to leave the office each day. "That's what cost me my job," she said. "I thought I was being a good witness for Christ by serving as the office doormat. People wipe their feet on doormats." She had raised her two children as a single mother, earned her college degree at night, and had once been active … [Read more...]


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