7 Stupid Things for Friday

7 Stupid Things for Friday October 21, 2016

Oh ah, here we are at the end of another long week. Today, dammit, we’re going to finish all our school work and then do something fun in the rain. Why in the rain? you ask. Well, we couldn’t do something fun on the nice bright sunny warm days of this week, because we just couldn’t, that’s why. No, we carefully waited for the rain and the wind. Why do you have to do something fun? you ask. Because we can’t just work all the time. We have to take an afternoon off. Really? you repost. Oh, well, I guess not. I mean, of course we can just keep working and working and never pausing for anything but lunch.

Yeah, I’m kind of overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed by the mounting piles of school, by the big pile of stuff I really really need to get to at church, by the list of ways I want to sucker you into buying my, oh never mind. And most of all, I’m overwhelmed by the ridiculously fast way every day races by.

Oh, and no kidding, I’m overwhelmed by this wretched election. There is something deeply and profoundly (so sue me, I can’t think of any better words today) demoralizing about watching this train wreck moment, of being forced to chose between two of the worst people in human history. Ok ok, maybe there are lots worse people. Who are they? Athaliah from the bible and Attila the Hun? Or is that a micro aggression? So many questions, so little, as I mentioned already, time.

So here are seven contributions to the What A Stupid Time To Be Alive Meme.
One
You know what’s stupid? That we have these big mega stores but you still can’t get all the things in one store. Here are these massive temples of stuff but I still have to go to three separate ones of them because no single one can have All The Things. Why, I want to know, can’t Aldi sell hot chocolate? And peanut butter without sugar in it? And how come only Weiss sells tea? And how come Price Rite cannot sell good coffee? Why? Really, I want to know. How come?
Two
You know what else is stupid, when you manage to stagger out of bed and into clothes and you go up to the school room to do school and you walk in and find that for some reason someone thought it would be good to scatter every single colored pencil and marker all over the floor. Every single one. So if you walk across the floor you’re going to step on them and break them, all. So instead of starting your school day you have stop and scream like a lunatic, because when you said, “pick up all the pencils” everyone just gazed at you in wonder. It was only when you screamed that anyone understood what you were saying.
Three
Oh, and here’s something stupid. Being so dependent on the internet that you can’t function as a human when the wifi goes out, which it does a lot because why wouldn’t it. So then you stand around, frustrated and angry, but also ticked off because twenty years ago your life had meaning, but now it doesn’t, because no wifi.
Four
So then you can realize what a stupid narcissist you are, and how now everyone is a narcissist. Remember back when just some of the people had Narcissistic Personality Disorder but now you do and everyone does? Everyone.
Five
Oh, and I know, I know, it’s stupid and wrong to complain so much. It is. I was just reading the bible, you know, because I’m all about keeping up with my reading plan, and I totally noticed how angry God gets when we complain. So writing yet another blog post complaining is smart. Super smart. And not the least bit stupid.
Six
But also, isn’t it really really stupid how little girls have to change their clothes every two or three hours, and throw the clothes down on the floor, and put on new clothes, so that you have to do twice as much laundry as should be reasonably expected. And then, while you’re folding the big big piles of laundry that you shouldn’t have to do because none of the clothes were dirty, these same little girls come and chatter at you while you’re trying to listen to your long waited for audio book, making you feel like a jerk for wanting them to go away and leave you alone. And then later you read a blog post about how you’re supposed to treasure every moment.
Seven
And finally, in the what a stupid time to be alive category, I’ll offer up the stupidity of sin in general. Selfishness, anger, disobedience, unkindness–all of it, so so stupid.

What is the opposite of stupid? Sense, maybe. Rationality. Selflessness. Oh well, maybe next week.
Go check out more takes! And have a nice day, or a stupid one.


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