One
I won’t lie, I just spent 20 minutes looking at Ivanka’s Facebook page. Gosh she’s beautiful. Practically as beautiful as Michelle Obama. But you know, I think the real problem with American politics is that you have, apparently, to be tall in order for people to love you. Really, I think the underlying heightism that permeates every corner of our modern discourse is evil and there should be caps on the number of tall people who can engage in politics. Like, 20%. Then the rest have to be short trolls. This will one 1. Help me to stop wasting time on Facebook looking at beautiful people and 2. Help keep our eyes on the issues, whatever they are.
Two
Speaking of fame, here is my little foray into the local limelight. I was interviewed about my book.
If you feel like I said, “the Bible is too hard, read my book instead” when you read the introduction, you’ll find that impression sharply corrected. But for real, read my book AND the Bible.
Three
I’m going back to the doctor today, one way or another. I’m not better at all. In fact, this morning I felt like I was about to perish. A pot of tea and three Advil later I don’t feel quite like that moment has arrived Yet, but I am lying here contemplating a life of chronic illness and being mad at God and myself. I like to go to the worse possible senecio first, just so things can only get better. So that would be 1. I’m dying. 2. I’m not dying but it would be better if I did. 3. I’m not dying but I’m going to be bedridden and God will teach me a lot of things that I don’t really want to know. 4. I’m not dying but I have another month of feeling awful. 5. I’m not dying and I’m about to get better and God is just messing with me.
Four
The bookending of the Feeding of the Five Thousand in Matthew with the Death of John the Baptist on one side and the Walking on the Water on the other side always surprises me, every time I come to it. Jesus hears about John’s ignoble, party favor death, is grieved, retreats, is followed by crowds of hungry and needy people, feeds them all bread, is still exhausted and sends his disciples away into a storm, and then thinks he’ll take a little walk in the night. Insomnia? Or the kind of messing with them that I feel like he’s always doing with me? But the food is in the middle. The helplessness death on one side, helplessness of danger and possible death on the other, and in the middle, bread and teaching. A calm scene of people sitting around on the grass, getting enough to eat. All the neediness and Anxiety of life suddenly stopped so they can sit down and eat something. It’s not that death and trouble stop looming over and threatening everyone–after all, they all have to go home and face their own lives, and the disciples have to get in the boat and almost die– but there, in the center of it, is the Bread and the Word, brining it all down a notch just for a moment, giving rest to the gathered throng, and something to eat. Which is how church should be. You go and sit, just for a bit, and eat and rest, and then you have to go back out into the dumb boat and freak out about dying, and then be chastised by Jesus for being afraid.
Five
Been trying to take pictures of my dogs for that before and after Meme. I can only take selfies with my dog because he won’t look at me, I have to put the camera round underneath so that he doesn’t really notice. Which means I’m always in the picture. Here’s before I said, “Good baby dog!”
And here’s after.
Six
We’ve decided to finally have a party, both for my book, and because of this gorgeous house. On Sunday in church I offered to sign any book, doesn’t even have to be mine, because that’s not weird at all. Anyway, if you want to come, and you’re not a weird murderous stalker, private message me on twitter of facebook.
Seven
And now I will roll out of bed and roll down the hall and lie on the couch and try not to curse the darkness. Have a lovely day and go read more and better takes!
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