It Must Be Almost Thanksgiving Because I’m Steam Cleaning the Shower

So I was steam-cleaning the shower; giving the house it’s Thanksgiving go-over.

I have an industrial-strength steamer that, when it’s fully rigged up, looks a lot like one of the bugs in Starship Troopers. It produces hot, hot steam in violent jets that dissolve dirt and slay bacteria with a single hiss.

I was running it with the squeegee attachment, going up and down the shower walls, steam coming out in an angry zzzzzzzz, my laboriously straightened hair collapsing into tight little curls, when my youngest son popped his head around the bathroom door.

“Whachadoin’?” he asked.

(Duhhhhhh …)

“Cleaning the shower.”

“I want you to come do that to my shower,” meaning, the shower in the house he shares with his brother, a shower so dirty that there’s no way to be sure what color the enamel might be; a shower so dirty that self-respecting bacteria moved out months ago; a shower so dirty that I wouldn’t use it to bathe a dog.

“Nope. But you can borrow the steamer.”

“But I want you to come do it.”

“Nope.”

“All right then,” he said, wandering off.

I guess I’m responsible. After all, I raised him.

When he marries, I plan to begin my relationship with my new daughter-in-law by apologizing.

 

 

Where’s My Princess Purse?

Convos with My Two-Year-Old.

This one is about playing princess with Daddy.

Enjoy.

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Patheos’ Beer Guy and Choc Beer

Fw

Patheos’ Beer Guy, Frank Weathers

My husband and I took a rambling drive through the Oklahoma hills yesterday. 

We wound around the Talihina Drive and ended up at Pete’s Place in Krebs, Oklahoma. For those of you who don’t know, that means we were well and royally fed. 

I admired the beer menu, and the good folks at Pete’s gave it to me. Here it is, for the perusal of all you poor folks out there who aren’t Okies. (And, of course, Patheos’ own beer connoisseur, Frank Weathers) I’m not a beer drinker, but those who are say that Pete’s and Choc beer are beyond compare. 

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Boxing the Cat

Do big cats like boxes as much as little cats?

Watch and see.

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Convos with My 3-Year-Old: Ferngully and Gas Prices

Convos with My 3-Year-Old. My fav YouTube.

Enjoy.

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Guess What? Heaven and Hell are BOTH in Oklahoma!

Hell Fire

It seems that a number of the Catholic Patheosi are blogging about hell.

Since all I know of hell is what I’ve learned during the last week of session in the Oklahoma Legislature, I’ve decided to talk about that other place.

Enjoy.

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Telekinetic Girl (Not)

Belated Halloween prank video. I’m not much of a practical joke fan, but since every person in this video had to sign off on being part of it, I decided that it is ok to publish.

And of course, there’s the likelihood that every person in this video, including the customers, is an actor, and the prank is really on us. All I know is that the people in the coffee shops around here aren’t nearly this well-groomed, fit and attractive.

See if you can figure out how they did it.

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Music: My Piano Hates Rain

Musical

It took me a while to figure this out, and now that I have, I’m still trying to figure it out.

It begins with the simple facts that I love the sound of rain and we’re now in the fall rainy season here in Okieland.

What that means in practical terms is that I often open the back door and shove up a couple of windows so I can hear the rain. I’ve found that I especially love the sound of the rain while I play the piano. It’s a kind of unexpected bliss.

But here’s the weirdo catch.

I noticed a couple of weeks ago that my piano had gone out of tune. It has migrated a tiny bit since I had it tuned when I first got it, but this was so gecky that I would hit a key and then hit it again and go bleh. Then, I’d decide that, even though I don’t have a piano tuning in my budget until January, I am going to call and get the blamed thing tuned because I. Cannot. Stand. This. Ugly.

The next day, it would be back in tune.

This happened repeatedly.

I began to think my piano had a poltergeist. I decided that maybe, instead of a piano turner, it needed a priest.

Then, I began to see a not-so-subtle correlation. On rainy days, when I open the door and windows and turn off the central heat and air, the piano goes out of tune. On dry days, it goes back in tune.

It’s raining today, but, in deference to my piano, I’ve left the doors shut, the windows down and the central stuff on. So far, it’s in tune.

My piano does not have a poltergeist.

It does, however, appear to have arthritis.

Poll Results: Hemorrhoids, Toenail Fungus and IRS More Popular Than Congress

Colbert

86% of the American people disapprove of the job our Congress is doing.

Public Policy Polling tested Congress head to head with various entities. According to the results, all these things are more popular than Congress.

Hemorrhoids 52 Congress 31

IRS 42 Congress 33

Mothers-in-Law 64 Congress 20

Dog Poop 44 Congress 41

Toenail Fungus 44 Congress 42

Department of Motor Vehicles 58 Congress 24

Charles manson

Congress did beat out one contender (drum roll):

Charles Manson 18 Congress 56

Nine Out of Ten Americans Back Bold New Strategy for Syria

The link for this article came from reader Ken. I think The Onion may very well have found a solution for Syria, as well as many other problems this country faces.

Enjoy.

Poll: Majority Of Americans Approve Of Sending Congress To Syria

 Sep 5, 2013

A majority of U.S. citizens believe congressional leaders in both the House and Senate must be sent to war-torn Syria immediately.

WASHINGTON—As President Obama continues to push for a plan of limited military intervention in Syria, a new poll of Americans has found that though the nation remains wary over the prospect of becoming involved in another Middle Eastern war, the vast majority of U.S. citizens strongly approve of sending Congress to Syria.

The New York Times/CBS News poll showed that though just 1 in 4 Americans believe that the United States has a responsibility to intervene in the Syrian conflict, more than 90 percent of the public is convinced that putting all 535 representatives of the United States Congress on the ground in Syria—including Senate pro tempore Patrick Leahy, House Speaker John Boehner, House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, and, in fact, all current members of the House and Senate—is the best course of action at this time. (Read more here.)


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