Letters to the Three Moms in my life: I can’t thank you enough

May 11, 2013 by Leave a Comment
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In honor of mother's day, I wanted to write some notes to each of the three moms in my life.  Of course, none of them were or are, perfect.  But I'm fortunate, in that each of them are easy to honor.   My mother-in-law is equally wonderful, but this blog's already too long to add a fourth mom, so I'll just say thanks here.  In the comments feel free to share how your mom has been a gift to you.To my mom by adoption:  Happy Mothers day to the one who was, in nearly every sense of the wo … [Read more...]

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Wordless Sermon: Lessons learned from climbing with my son

July 6, 2012 by Leave a Comment
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"First of all a good alpinist should be a good man and this is a really difficult goal to achieve, often a whole life is not enough." - H. BarmasseWith ten days left before his wedding, my son and I took two days out of our busy lives and climbed together.  It was supposed to be a whole family affair, but things happen and in the end it was the two of us, tied together on a rope, making our way up a few faces in the Icicle canyon of Leavenworth.Outside is what we do, what we've always … [Read more...]

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“The Demise of Guys” – a book review that’s going places”

June 2, 2012 by 7 Comments

Philip Zimbardo and Nikita Duncan have written a marvelous little book called "The Demise of Guys".  In reality it's little more than an expanded version of this TED talk, and is far more diagnostic than prescriptive.  Still, the first step in fixing anything is determining the extent to which it's broken, and what some of the causes of that brokenness might be.  If exposing dysfunction and it's underlying causes is important, these two shine bright, relentless sunshine on the state of men, and w … [Read more...]

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Focus on the Dysfunctional Family

May 23, 2012 by 21 Comments

I love my friend, Larry Shallenberger's paragraph in this post, about the danger of "Christian Church Culture".  He likens God's transforming process to that of a mechanic restoring an old motorcycle, believing that the old rusted bike has its best years ahead of it.  We religious people, meanwhile, tend to handle each other like airport luggage handlers. This leads to the false belief that its better to lower our heads and fit in.Lower our heads and fit in. Covertly demand that, as a p … [Read more...]

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Love Ingredients: Truth, Grace, Proportion

February 14, 2012 by 6 Comments

"full of grace and truth" John 1:14"Who can pull that off?" is the question I ask with all the urgency I can muster because I'm more convinced than ever that this is perhaps the only possible solid foundation upon which genuine intimacy can be built.  Look at any relationship where love continues to ripen and deepen, year after year, and you'll find that the couple has managed to express both truth and grace.  But there's more.  The couple has also found a way express these elements at the r … [Read more...]

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I’ve got mono! The challenges and beauty of monogamy

July 8, 2011 by 8 Comments
still crazy...in love..after all these years

The New Times published an article recently positing that infidelity was, for some marriages, just the right ingredient needed to keep a marriage strong.  The advocate for this lifestyle is none other than Seattle's own Dan Savage, of "Savage Love",  Stranger fame.  At first blush (pun intended), the article appears not to be worth the time to read.  Who cares about some guy's theory that married couples would be happier in some cases if infidelity was an accepted part of the marriage package?  B … [Read more...]

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