I didn’t realize he had gone off he wagon, but Daniel Travanti, of 80’s Cop drama ‘Hill Street Blues’ fame needs to go back to group / treatment.
Last week he was contacting brave Florida atheist activist, EllenBeth Wachs. But he let out a bizarre rant, ‘no atheists in foxholes’ canard in check. EllenBeth and I trounced him, thinking we were simply encountering a religious attack (happened to both of us before, I assure you).
I now regret making specific attacks about his struggle with alcohol addiction. Unbeknownst to me, that’s exactly what he’s fighting again. If anybody out there is able to reach people who care about him, please do so. If you want to send him an encouraging e-mail, or pass his current info along to appropriate support groups, he seems to be welcoming it.
Dear Diary – Boy what a couple of weeks! I allow myself three fingers of Cutty Sark after taking my evening Elavil, and one impulsive e-mail later, I made acquaintance with enough M-16 toting, foxhole-digging, atheist Travis Bickle doppelgangers to cast a Marty Scorsese film, or a Gustav Hasford novel, for that matter. But it hasn’t been all bad. It’s like my “wife” Fay Furilllo (played by the wonderful Barbara Bosson – who was married to Steven Bochco until 1997) used to say to Frank: “Hey Buster, the Lord works in mysterious ways.” Now I realize you atheists don’t say this much, seeing as how you all “pretend” not to believe in the Lord, but by golly, I have come to realize, that is O.K. Actually, at the time, I didn’t know if by “Lord” she was referring to the big-guy God, or Jesus – who as I understand it, was definitely Jewish. It didn’t matter though, as I soon dumped her for that “dish”, Joyce Davenport, who was a real tiger in the sack – although a true gentleman does not, as they say, kiss, do a “rusty trombone”, and tell, and I don’t intend to start now. However, I will reveal that it was Joyce who talked Frank into wearing his “trademark” vests.
Anywho, I digress – getting back to the “mysterious ways” thing – my agent tells me that none other the Coen brothers (do I even need to mention the Jewish angle?) called to offer to have me read for the part of Albert Einstein in their rumored latest project with the working title: “It’s All Relative”. I was so taken aback, I thought about converting to Judaism myself, but then I open the morning paper here in Kenosha, and see that Patriots wide receiver, Julian Edelman, was arrested at a Halloween party (a pagan holiday, by the way). Now I’m no Patriots fan, but that could spell suspension for the fastest Jew in the NFL. Then it would be back to Adam Goldberg (who’s a lineman for Christ’s sake – sorry Jesus) and Sage Rosenfels, who I once saw talking to Tony Dungy, so I’m not even sure. Either way, I am re-thinking the whole conversion deal.
So maybe there is no God. Who really knows? I guess I will, if I get a call-back from Joel and Ethan.
As Sgt. Esterhaus always used to say: “Let’s be careful out there.” Whatever the hell that was supposed to mean. Now where did I set the Cutty?
Please, do contact your AA support group. I hope your struggle takes a tick for the better. I’m publishing this in an attempt to reach out to people you know. Let them help you. Who cares about the religion stuff? Let’s get you better, man. No matter what, you should pick up the phone before taking one more step. You probably need to take more than 12, but at least work with that dozen you know so well. You’ve had success before, and you can have it again.
Foxhole Atheist who sincerely hopes you return to sobriety.