Beautiful, Beautiful Bitterness

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The other morning, I came across a tweet from a self-identified “theobrogian,” calling for ex-fundamentalist bloggers to “stop making a career out of bitterness.”The first thing I thought was, who the hell is hiring people to be bitter? Is that a skill I can list on my resume? That would be my dream job! My second thought was that this is hardly original. I’ve been called bitter more times than I can count. Even before I started a blog that focuses on calling out abuse in Christi … [Read more...]

Why Do We Blame the Victim?: We Don’t Want to Face Our Responsibility and Privilege

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This is post number two in a series I'm working on about why we tend to blame victims in our society. My church has been covering this topic in it's latest sermon series (which you can listen to online). Also, I've been taking a seminary class on the Psalms and Wisdom Literature, which contain some interesting, and often contradictory messages about victim blaming.In my first post in this series, I discussed one possible reason for why we blame victims: We are afraid of a world outside of … [Read more...]

N.T. Wright: A Follow-Up

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I'm still getting interesting responses to the post on N.T. Wright and marriage equality that I wrote a couple of weeks ago. N.T. Wright fans can get vicious, y'all. I don't think I've ever gotten death threats from Nazi sympathizers on here before (and I've had my blog linked both to Reddit Men's Rights, and Douglas Wilson's blog, so that's saying something). Skipping over the troll comments, I thought I'd tackle some of the more "serious" responses in this follow-up post. Fuckin' Analogies! … [Read more...]

On Proverbs, Job, and Why Victim Blaming is Next to Blasphemy

Image from William Blake's Illustrations of the Book of Job (via wikipedia commons)[Job in anguish, being comforted by his three friends and his wife]

I've been taking a class on the Psalms and Wisdom Literature, and reading both the books of Job and the books of Proverbs, which seem to take a drastically different approach to the topic of blaming victims.Proverbs is filled with statements about the way the world supposedly works: People who despise advice will find themselves in trouble; those who respect it will succeed (13:13)Poor is he who works with a negligent hand, But the hand of the diligent makes rich. (10:4)Commit your … [Read more...]

More Like N.T. Wrong, Amirite?: How N.T. Wright’s Bigotry Causes Him To Contradict His Own Theology

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In case you haven't heard, N.T. Wright--author of theology books such as Surprised By Hope and Simply Christian, and former Bishop of Durham--recently did an interview in which he compared people who support marriage equality to Nazis and Soviet Communists.Nazis.And Soviet Communists.While I'm not surprised that Wright is not on board with marriage equality (he's brought up his opposition to LGB people in several other places), I was a little shocked to hear a man who is considered, a … [Read more...]

A Benediction for My Fellow Queer Christians

For personal safety reasons, I'm going to ask anyone who chooses to share this post to please not tag me on any social media sites. Thank you.   ______________It's not a sin to be gay, lesbian, or bisexual. And I don't mean it like some folk mean it--"It's not a sin to be gay! Just to act on your gayness." To quote my grandmother-in-law, "That's horse piss!" Acting gay, lesbian, or bisexual--finding members of your own sex attractive; crushing on, dating, marrying, flirting with, and/or sl … [Read more...]

Modest Is Hottest: A Guest Post for No Shame Movement

Today, I'm over at No Shame Movement sharing my story about growing up in Christian purity culture. Check it out! Also, be sure to read the other stories at NSM, and follow No Shame Movement on Twitter! “What would happen if I bought this shirt three sizes too small?” I joked to my sister, as we waited for my mom to finish up her shopping at the Christian bookstore. The shirt in question was a woman’s tee shirt with the words “Modest Is Hottest” across the front.The sizes seemed to line up w … [Read more...]

Loving My Mind for Lent.

Last year, during Lent, I wrote what would turn out to be one of my most popular blog posts of all time. In this post, "Loving My Body for Lent," I decided that for Lent, I would give up the harmful teachings I'd inherited from purity culture, and I would take on a new attitude toward my own body. I’m setting it free from the hatred that I have directed toward it for years and years. I’m setting it free from any responsibility that the church tries to put on it for the sins of men. I’m setting i … [Read more...]

The Answer To Sexual Shame is Not MORE Sexual Shame, Carson T. Clark

[Content Note: Sexual and Spiritual Abuse]When I was 16, I dated an abuser who was constantly coercing me into having sex with him. I had been raised in fundamentalist purity culture, so I thought of sex as something gross and scary. My boyfriend at the time tried to combat those feelings by sending me on guilt trips and by holding me to his manipulative, subjective standards of "responsibility."He'd say things like, "You hugging me turned me on. You're a horrible person if you turn a … [Read more...]

Why I’d Choose Conservative Christianity Over Amanda Marcotte’s Feminism

Photograph of Amanda Marcotte

[Content Note: Rape, Victim Blaming, Unjust Arrest]This Monday, popular feminist writer Amanda Marcotte wrote a decent piece for Salon, describing victim blaming in conservative Christianity. In it, she pointed out that in many conservative Christian circles... "...[m]en’s choices, especially men’s sexual choices, are the responsibility of women. So if a man chooses to rape you, it’s understood not as him asserting dominance over you, but as the man taking the liberties you must have extende … [Read more...]


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