Modest Is Hottest: A Guest Post for No Shame Movement

Today, I'm over at No Shame Movement sharing my story about growing up in Christian purity culture. Check it out! Also, be sure to read the other stories at NSM, and follow No Shame Movement on Twitter! “What would happen if I bought this shirt three sizes too small?” I joked to my sister, as we waited for my mom to finish up her shopping at the Christian bookstore. The shirt in question was a woman’s tee shirt with the words “Modest Is Hottest” across the front.The sizes seemed to line up w … [Read more...]

Love And R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Image Found on Wikipedia (click for link). From Billboard, page 9, 15 July 1967

As regular readers know, I've recently read the Christian marriage book, Love and Respect (which was supposed to be included in my "You Are Not Your Own" series, but had to be cut due to time constraints), and have been discussing it here in blog posts and on Twitter.The big theme of the book--the one from which the title is derived--is author Dr. Emerson Eggerichs' theory that a man's primary need is respect, and a woman's primary need is love. Eggerichs' believes women need to learn how to … [Read more...]

If Jesus is Lord, then Caesar is not.

Image via http://shawna-bonna.tumblr.com/

Last night at church, my pastor talked about the phrase "Jesus is Lord," and what that phrase means. After church, a fellow church goer was wanting to start a conversation about what "Jesus is Lord" means to different people and asked if I would write a blog post on the subject.My relationship with the idea that "Jesus is Lord" is complicated in a couple of ways. First of all, as someone who identifies as both a Unitarian Universalist and a Christian, I am wary of the exclusive mindset such … [Read more...]

“You Are Not Your Own:” Unmarried Women Belong to Their Parents

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This post is part of a series called“You Are Not Your Own,” focusing on rape and sexual assault in Christian relationship/dating booksTrigger Warning for rape, sexual assaultNote: this research mainly focused on female rape. Though it is not the focus of my project, male rape is a huge problem as well–1 out of every 10 rape victims is male. I wanted to make it clear that, despite the focus of my study, it is not only women (and definitely not only cisgender women) who face sexual violenc … [Read more...]

Racism, Dehumanization, and Trayvon Martin

Trayvon-Martin-2

Trigger Warning: Racism, dehumanization, discussion of racial violence and the George Zimmerman caseI've spent a few blog posts recently talking about the way that the patriarchal mindsets in some popular Christian dating books dehumanize both men and women in specific ways. They dehumanize men to absolve men of responsibility, or to use "bad" men as a threat to women who refuse to submit to the "loving, godly leadership" of "good" men. They dehumanize women  in order to keep women tied to … [Read more...]

Would Father’s Day be different?

Would Father's Day be different . . .If Christianity wasn't preaching that, not only are they allowed to hit their children, but they must hit their children in order to be good fathers?If complementarianism wasn't telling dads that it's a woman's job to raise children, and that caring, nurturing men are "emasculated?"If society wasn't still pumping out the tired, old idea that masculinity equals power, and that men who do not have complete control over their families are not real me … [Read more...]

Complementarianism’s ugly relationship with rape

[Trigger warning: rape apologism][Update: I've changed some mentions of "evangelical leaders" to "complementarian leaders" to clarify that I am referring specifically to complementarians in this post. I have a habit of using the two interchangeably because of my experiences in evangelicalism, but there is a growing number of awesome feminist evangelicals out there who don't deserve to be lumped in with complementarians]Over the past few months, I've called out evangelical Christian … [Read more...]

Happy International Women’s Day and Feminist Coming Out Day!

March 8th is an exciting day! First of all, it's my wonderful partner's 28th birthday (Happy Birthday, Abe!). Second, it's National Colon Cleansing Day (Remember! A clean colon is a happy colon).And then, it's International Women's Day and Feminist Coming Out Day!As much as I love Abe and colons, this post is going to focus on the latter two.When I first "came out" as a feminist about a year ago, I got a lot of responses. Some positive, some discouraging. But, I think, by far the most … [Read more...]

Tell us we’re not strong enough. But you’re wrong.

Some people out there say that Christianity is for men, because our God came to earth as a man. He was brutally executed on a cross and there was blood and guts and other bad-ass manly things. Some people think that, if the church gets too "feminized," we might replace Jesus with a Disney princess and the cross with a field of dandelions and the broken body and blood of Christ with chocolate milk and cupcakes.Yeah, some people think that way.I don't think those people know a lot about … [Read more...]

How does inequality hurt men?

My previous post was a release of all the sarcastic comments that I have been holding inside since I became a feminist. It was a response to every negative comment that I received because of making that decision. I wanted to express my frustrations that so many people don't believe feminism is relevant, that so many people think that women are now equal to men or even the new oppressors of men. That so many people believe equality is a zero-sum game.And I think some people missed the point.I … [Read more...]


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