The Myth of Male Privilege?

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A friend sent me a link to a blog post, written by a mom about boys: 11 things Only Parents of Boys Understand. It’s well done, funny, and insightful. But in “thing #2” came that familiar storyline that we continue to perpetrate to the detriment of our sons: 2. Simultaneously hating and being grateful for [Read More...]

Beer, the NFL, and Domestic Violence

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OK…I’ll dive in and take the heat: Does anyone else find it a bit disingenuous that a beer company (one of the NFL’s biggest sponsors) said that they were not satisfied with the way the NFL was handling the domestic abuse issues? Ninety-two percent of the domestic abuse assailants reported use of alcohol or other [Read More...]

The Imperative for Brain-Washing our Kids

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I’ve been a pastor for over 30 years. For the last 9 years a part of my focus has been on the challenges boys face in the 21st Century, and the challenge churches face in keeping boys engaged. 70-90% of all boys will leave the Christian Church, and most won’t come back. Often, when I [Read More...]

Are Children’s/Youth Ministries the New Leper Colonies?

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The little children were being brought to Jesus in order that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples spoke sternly to those who brought them…(Matthew 20:13) The disciples had a knack for protecting Jesus from those they considered unimportant. They wanted to send away the 5000 to feed themselves. They wanted [Read More...]

Sunday Schooling Our Kids Out of Church

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About 40 years ago a profound shift took place in many Christian congregations across the country…for all the right reasons…with one troubling unintended consequence: In the 1960’s and 1970’s, my generation, Baby Boomers, rebelled against the “institutional church” just as we did with every other institution our parents built/supported.  We rebelled by dropping out: 2/3rds [Read More...]

It Takes a Man to Raise a Boy Into a Man

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In the twenty-first century, the overwhelming majority of boys are being mentored primarily by women: moms and grandmas, female preschool teachers, female elementary teachers, female Sunday school teachers, and, more often than not, educational TV shows skewed to girls. A few fortunate boys have a dad, uncle, or grandpa to pour male energy into the [Read More...]

The Hole in a Man’s Soul–The Father Wound

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If you dig deep enough into the soul of a man who for some reason seems a bit lost in life, or maybe real lost, you’ll usually find a man who never received affirmation from his father. In groups, I often ask men, by a show of hands, how many never received a blessing from [Read More...]

Real Boys Don’t “Fall in Love” with Jesus

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Imagine dropping your son off at football practice and as he’s walking toward the field you yell out: Son, one of my hopes for you this season is that you fall in love with your coach! Or imagine saying to your son: Son, my greatest desire, as your dad/mom, is that you fall in love [Read More...]


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