10 Other Things That Are Going to Happen Within 15 Days of the End of Shemitah

10 Other Things That Are Going to Happen Within 15 Days of the End of Shemitah September 1, 2015

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CharismaNews brings us the bold prophecies of one Michael T. Snyder in his prophetic post, “10 Things That Are Going to Happen Within 15 Days of the End of the Shemitah.”

The Shemitah, for those who don’t speak Charisma, refers to a convoluted mix of astrology and Jewish holy days — lunar eclipses, “blood moons,” etc. The details aren’t important. What matters here is that Snyder’s “Shemitah year” ends on a specific date: September 13. That’s a week from Sunday (or, for those following a more conventional Christian calendar than the folks at CharismaNews, its the 16th Sunday after Pentecost).

So kudos to Snyder for putting his reputation on the line by making his predictions so time-specific. Here, I aim to meet his challenge with 10 prophesies of my own. Please note that my prophesies are even more concrete and specific than Snyder’s list — and every bit as meaningful.

1. Sept. 15. The manufacturers of felt hats attempt, and fail, to get much of anybody else to join them in celebrating National Felt Hat Day.

2. Sept. 16. Stephen Colbert welcomes Kevin Spacey, Carol Burnett, Abbi Jacobson, Ilana Glazer, and Willie Nelson as his guests on The Late Show. At least one of these people will say something pretty funny.

3. Sept. 19. You will be briefly confused by all the arrrrghing and aiiiiying in your Twitter feed before you remember that, oh, right, it’s Talk Like a Pirate Day.

4. Sept. 21. As The Voice makes its season premiere on NBC, a talented country singer will briefly seem to be having difficulty choosing among the coaches before, after the commercial break, hugging Blake Shelton.

5. Sept. 22. There will be cosplay under a really big tree somewhere as Tolkien enthusiasts celebrate Bilbo and Frodo’s birthday.

6. Sept. 22-24. Three-game series between the Marlins and Phillies in Miami will determine who owns the fourth-place bragging rights in the NL East.

7. Sept. 25. Comic shops across the country will have to patiently explain to disgruntled patrons that “Comic Book Day” is not the same thing as Free Comic Book Day, which was back in May, and you missed it.

8. Sept. 25. After the horror movie Before I Wake releases nationwide, at least one person will leave a theater confused and disappointed that Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy weren’t even in this movie.

9. Sept. 28. Skateboarder and Jackass-costar Bam Margera, of West Chester, Pa., improbably survives to his 35th birthday.

10. Sept. 28. The World Doesn’t End.

 


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