Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 48: ‘Holy Spirits’


Ephesians 5:18 says “Do not get drunk on wine [Greek: oinos], which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.” For evangelicals, the word “wine” here refers to wine, which is evil. But in the second chapter of John’s Gospel, when Jesus changes some 30 gallons of water into “wine” [oinos] that’s really just nonalcoholic grape juice — because what’s a wedding feast without at least 30 gallons of nonalcoholic grape juice? [Read more...]

Where you gonna run to? Tim LaHaye and Billy Graham vs. Peter Tosh and Nina Simone

Same words. Different sermon.

Nina Simone learned the song “Sinner Man” from her mother, who was a revivalist Methodist preacher. White revivalist preachers sang that song too, but even though most of the words were the same, the meaning was very different. [Read more...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 47: ‘Accidental honesty’

Jesus love the little children. Which is why they will all be disintegrated at the Rapture.

In the year 2000, about 30 percent of the world’s population was under the age of 15. That’s about 1.8 billion people. But Buck Williams, investigative journalist, doesn’t notice that all the children vanished in the disappearances until Hattie points it out to him. Twice. [Read more...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 46: ‘The Good Wife’


We aren’t told the specifics of the awful thing or things that Jeff did. He may have cheated. Or drank. Or maybe he hit her. Perhaps all three. For LaHaye and Jenkins, it really doesn’t matter what he did, all that matters is Sharon’s duty as a good, godly wife to forgive him and preserve their marriage no matter what. [Read more...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 45: ‘Rule No. 4′


Originally posted May 6, 2005. Left Behind,¬†pp. 89-96 The good news: Buck Williams is finally out of the men’s room stall. The bad news: He spends the next five pages in a phone booth. I recently came across Kurt Vonnegut’s “Eight rules for writing fiction.” It’s a good list, the value of which becomes clearer [Read More...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 44: ‘Reciprocity’


LaHaye and Jenkins paint a disturbingly accurate portrait of a the kind of predatory, exploitative married man that young women would be wise to stay away from, yet they seem to think they’re describing the kind of homewrecking young woman that married men ought to stay away from. [Read more...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 43: ‘Not a conspiracy theory’

Events in the real world have overtaken the "currency unification" conspiracy theories in "Left Behind." It's not good when your "biblical prophecy" foretelling the future looks dated. (Graphic snurched from ABC news.)

Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins don’t have to bother with any research into the economic implications of a single world currency or why anyone would ever want such a thing because this conspiracy theory is for them, literally, an article of faith. They believe this will happen as the fulfillment of biblical prophecy. Specifically, they believe it is foretold in Revelation 13:16-17: “[The beast] also forced everyone, small and great, free and slave, to receive a mark on his right hand or on his forehead, so that no one could buy or sell unless he had the mark …” [Read more...]

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 42: ‘Buck & Jules’


Buck’s spiritual awakening is a lot like that of Jules, Samuel L. Jackson’s character in Quentin Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction. Jules was a professional killer who experiences a revelatory “moment of clarity” after several shots fired at him point-blank failed to harm him. Jules regards this as a divine miracle and a sign that his life must change: ” Whether or not what we experienced was an according-to-Hoyle miracle is insignificant. What is significant is I felt God’s touch, God got involved.” [Read more...]