Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 15: ‘Hard to get a cab’

The early chapters of “Left Behind” read like a cross between a disaster movie and a parody of bad local TV news. “… and no one knows what happened to all the children or who might be next. Now let’s head out to the highways with Hank Hanneman in the KRW Traffic Center. Hank, what does today’s apocalyptic carnage mean for rush-hour travelers?” [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

NRA: The creationist satellite dish

“Bruce’s installing that crazy mini-satellite dish made him think of a verse he once heard or read about shouting the good news from the housetop. Matthew 10:27 said, ‘Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light, and what you hear in the ear, preach on the housetops.’ … Wasn’t it just like Bruce to take the Bible literally?” [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 14: ‘Concorde calling’

The first attempt to describe the full scale of the Rapture in “Left Behind” comes to readers third-hand. We’re told about the description of the global chaos as described by a passing pilot who is relaying the description he received from someone in the control tower at Paris Orly Airport. Here, as always in these books, Jerry Jenkins’ insistence on Tell, Don’t Show blunts the immediacy and the impact of what he’s hoping to convey. Even stranger, it paints Paris as a hotbed of fundamentalist Christianity. And we learn that the oppressed minority of real, true, Bible-believing Christians makes up 50 percent of the global elite flying aboard the Concorde. [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 13: ‘The Lex Luthor Factor’

After the Rapture in “Left Behind,” Buck Williams once, fleetingly, muses about the potential “perpetrators” of the mass disappearances in which more than two billion people around the world suddenly vanish. Then he forgets about it. But this bewildering, horrific event seems so much like the work of a supervillain that one would expect some would-be supervillains to at least try to piggy-back on the disappearances by making ransom demands. [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 12: ‘The Naked Truth’

If you saw a dozen people instantaneously vanish, leaving only a pile of clothing where they formerly stood, you would probably take a look at those piles of clothing to try to figure out what just happened. But then you’re not a character in “Left Behind.” … [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

NRA: The underground church

Bruce Barnes wasn’t just a pastor, traveling evangelist and biblical scholar. He was also a master electrician, plumber, carpenter, excavator, architect and locksmith. And he could carry refrigerators and convertible sofas up and down the stairs all by himself. Unfortunately, Bruce never paid much attention to seismology. [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

Left Behind Classic Fridays, No. 11: ‘Not creepy enough’

The apocalypse described in Stephen King’s ‘The Stand’ is genuinely frightening. ‘Left Behind’ is not. This is partly because Stephen King is a better writer, but the main difference is not his skill, but his objective. When you read ‘The Stand,’ he wants you to imagine this story is happening to you. When you read about the apocalypse in ‘Left Behind,’ the authors want you to imagine this story is happening to someone else — someone who, unlike you, deserves it. [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

NRA: Rebuilding the post-Rapture church

This puts the Antichrist on a very tight schedule. He has a strict list of prophecies that are going to need fulfilling and that timeline is non-negotiable. Within three and a half years of the Rapture, the Antichrist is going to need to be persecuting a global church and he’s going to need to be desecrating a Temple in Jerusalem. And there, on Day One of the Great Tribulation, the morning after the Rapture, neither a global church nor a Temple will exist. [Read more…]

Stay in touch with the Slacktivist on Facebook:

CLOSE | X

HIDE | X