As they say in Brooklyn, ya gotta read him! Ya gotta! He’s got all da goods, and it’s a beeyootiful thing!”
Stuff like this:
It’s a pleasure to watch the Australians and our guys work together. They’re interchangeable — except for that, that . . . uh, you know, that cricket thing . . . but for that flaw the Aussies would seem perfectly normal.
You don’t want to hear about Aussies and Yanks working. You know all about that. You want to know about the UN. The UN, you ask, what about the UN? Gee, fUNny you should ask. I was just thinking about the UN. Yesterday the UN rep who flew up to Aceh solely for the event, held a press conference at which he criticized the US airlift of supplies. The little S.O.B sniffed that it was “uncoordinated” and that some villages were fed twice while others were missed and that no “assessment teams” were being sent… I learn from colleagues who were there, no journalist asked the little twit just how many people the UN had fed, and if, indeed, “assessment teams” are what is needed why haven’t the gadzillion UN assessment teams hanging out in the capital moved into these remote villages. I’m sorry but I detest these Vultures more and more…
What else is the UN up to, you ask? Oh the usual that you would expect from an organization with a dozen or so well-funded agencies supposedly devoted to emergency humanitarian relief . . . no, no, not feed people or provide them medical care, what do you think the UN is, the US military or something? What is wrong with you readers? Has The Diplomad taught you nothing? The correct response is put out a press release in New York claiming to be doing all sorts of things that others, e.g., US and Australia, are doing — oh, and catch the dig at US helicopters.
BOOM-shockalockalocka! BOOM-shockalockalocka! Heh! Heh! Heh! Read the whole thing!