A few weeks ago I was reading Christopher Lawford’s lovely, candid and affectionate remembrance of growing up in a particular time and place with a particular family, the Kennedys, circa roughly 1950-2000. It’s called “Symptoms of Withdrawal.” At the end he quotes his Uncle Teddy. Christopher, Ted Kennedy and a few family members had gathered one night and were having a drink in Mr. Lawford’s mother’s apartment in Manhattan. Teddy was expansive. If he hadn’t gone into politics he would have been an opera singer, he told them, and visited small Italian villages and had pasta every day for lunch. “Singing at la Scala in front of three thousand people throwing flowers at you. Then going out for dinner and having more pasta.” Everyone was laughing. Then, writes Mr. Lawford, Teddy “took a long, slow gulp of his vodka and tonic, thought for a moment, and changed tack. ‘I’m glad I’m not going to be around when you guys are my age.’ I asked him why, and he said, ‘Because when you guys are my age, the whole thing is going to fall apart.’ ”
Mr. Lawford continued, “The statement hung there, suspended in the realm of ‘maybe we shouldn’t go there.’ Nobody wanted to touch it. After a few moments of heavy silence, my uncle moved on.”
Lawford thought his uncle might be referring to their family–that it might “fall apart.” But reading, one gets the strong impression Teddy Kennedy was not talking about his family but about . . . the whole ball of wax, the impossible nature of everything, the realities so daunting it seems the very system is off the tracks.
And–forgive me–I thought: If even Teddy knows . . .
Read it all.
Me, back when I used to write more:
Some might argue that what is coming “off the tracks” are the easy illusions of 20th century America: The perhaps naive notions that our elected leaders actually seek office to serve the public good. That the press is interested only in presenting the truth, no matter what. That our courts are peopled with lofty higher beings and geniuses who know better than the rest of us. That our churches are both safe havens and by-ways to heaven.
There was a time in America when all of those statements would have been accepted at face value. In our nation’s babyhood we believed and we trusted all the parent figures – the governments, the courts, the press, the churches.
Now, past infancy, we have come to look upon those institutions with the glare of adolescent angst. We’ve observed enough to understand that those in authority over us are not the paragons of perfection we’d so looked up to as toddlers. We see them flawed, weak, seducable, wholly human and fallible, and like good adolescents who have caught Mom and Dad lying or stumbling drunk, we at first sneered about it and gave some voice to our sense of betrayal. Now, we’re merely numb.
A slightly frantic Ebert – December 2008:
It’s all coming to pieces, isn’t it — the world we live in, the continuity we thought we could count on, the climate, the economy, the fragile peace. The 20th century was called “the American Century,” with some reason. I do not believe the 21st century will belong to anybody, and it may not last for 100 years of human witness. There are nuclear weapons in the Middle East and on the Indian subcontinent, and if one is used, more will follow and who can say when the devastation will end?
[...frenetic paragraphs and much "climate" alarmism...]
If you are a member of the U.S. Congress, you should not give a damn if you are a Democrat or a Republican. You should discard ideology and partisanship. You should be searching only for what works, or gives promise of working. You should be listening to the best counsel of the wisest people you can find. This is no time for playing to the crowd. That is all over with. This is the hour to seek what might lead us back from the brink.
I wonder if we are finally moving past the adolescent angst, and the numbness, and – per Ebert’s column, simply waking up to the fact that a bunch of loud, exploitative so-called “friends” crashed the house, called it a party, drank all the liquor, cracked Mom’s prize crystal egg and then decided to have a tug-of-war donnybrook on the front lawn before toilet papering the trees, puking and passing out. The press? Some “friends.” Congress? Some “statesmen.”
Hungover, we’re stumbling around, and realizing that if we do not start demanding adult behavior, adult leadership, less spin and a little honesty, not only from our leadership and our “elites” but from each other, we’re not going to be around to demand much of anything, of anyone.
Our friends on the left have put their faith and hope in President-elect Barack Obama. Those of us still on the fence about him hope that he is at least half as great as they say. That is more than the Bush-haters ever offered Bush, so perhaps it is a place to start.
And those of us with faith know that prayer is essential. Essential.
Your thoughts?
In our nation’s babyhood we believed and we trusted all the parent figures – the governments, the courts
As a “classical liberal,” you know better than that.
In our nation’s babyhood, we detested government and distrusted the courts. There was no government-love in the writings of Jefferson, Adams, or Paine. It was once Common Sense that “Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state an intolerable one.”
If we ever trusted government in our babyhood, it was a babyhood that was a modernist reversion to infantilism, not a babyhood in time. Perhaps, somewhere along the line, the American Revolution was replaced by the French Revolution, where individualism gave way to us-vs-them class warfare and sense of entitlement. That would then be fertile ground for the political hustlers who pit groups against each other, twist and distort truth, and gin up the pyramid schemes of government while skimming tons of cash off the top for their own enrichment.
It is the time of relativism and the time of building on foundations of sand. I told you all (circa Jan-Feb 2008) that it was going to get bad, really, really bad, before it was going to start getting better.
Me? I don’t want more “leadership” from governments and elites, but less.
I want them to go away. I want them to leave us alone. I want them to get the hell out of the way. “In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem; government is the problem.”
Are there still enough people in this country that understand that? Or have too many adopted the Katrina-New Orleans mentality of waiting for government to come save us while the flood waters of death rise around us?
The sad trouble with America, as with much of the world, is that we do not want to evolve past the adolescent phase of life. We have become “me centric” as a people. What can government do for me? Corporations owe me. The Nanny State owes me. At least infants show love and trust while devoted to self. The adolescent belives all is owed with not even love and trust expected in return.
This was brought home to me clearly during the last election cycle. In my homestate of Delaware, three candidates were competing for governor in the primaries and were making numerous joint appearances before special interest groups. These three, two Dems and one Republican, were trying to outdo each other on what the government could do to further run the lives of individuals. The Republican, a self proclaimed Conservative, was not shy in promoting more Nanny State initiatives!
The British Queen, visiting a London economic school recently, asked the question nearly everyone is asking. How could a situation so serious go undetected for so long? The answer Her Majesty was given was that all “leaders” and “thinkers” believed the flawed data they were given. The misplaced trust was never questioned. In our country, several Congressional members tried to question those in charge of the mortgage programs, but were bluntly told to not worry – nothing was wrong.
As Uncle Teddy realized during a vodka induced moment, it was all going to come crashing down. The “I can do it myself” attitude of America in the past had become the “you must do it for me” attitude. Corporations, government, the educational system, even God! Who can forget the “prosperity” preachers of the 80′s proclaiming that God was the heavenly version of Santa who “owed” us prosperity just because we loved him?
Yes, we must grow out of this phase and become adults. Each of us, as individuals, must grow up. And that adult attitude must become part of our culture, government, corporate world and Church. And at the heart of this growing up process is the change in our thought process on life itself. As adults, we do not have the “right” to end human life simply because it is too young or too old and it’s very existance is inconvenient to us. Then maybe God will hear and answer our prayer to help pull us out of the mess we got ourselves into by greed and failure to take responsibility for our lives.
I think it is more a matter of taking the adolescent wounds we bear post Kennedy assassination, Vietnam, and Watergate- and learning how to confront those wounds and heal. But as with many people who are wounded by their families in their adolescence, it takes time to confront those demons, especially when their families remain essentially unchanged. We’ve had Iran/Contra, and Monica Lewinsky, and the WMD debacle–it’s all just more of the same. Some people never bring their dark places to the light, and because the behaviour just repeats and repeats again, they use apathy as an excuse for living defined always by their brokenness. Add to that the dysfunctionality of their extended family preying on their wounds, and capitalizing on their deepest fears –which is precisely what the press and political pundits do in order to sell their news–and you get a people who are locked into living perpetually their wounded adolescence. And so, as with all those who are products of a co-dependent, whacked-out upbringing–we need to get to the point of accepting that we cannot change other people. We can only change ourselves. We can only change our behaviour. We can learn to set boundaries and enforce them. We can seek personal healing and try to enact change in our own lives. We can refuse to live in the fear and terror created to keep us enslaved.
Will that happen in some large scale way? I doubt it. People grow comfortable with their demons, it becomes easier and easier over time to live with what we’ve always known (even though what we’ve known has sucked). Complacency doesn’t require as much effort or personal sacrifice as does healing. The changes required to heal, almost always are conjoined with loss. That loss terrifies so many of us into just maintaining the status quo and passing on our dysfunction to the next generation.
My prophecy is, alas, self-fulfilling–this must be the End of All Things, since I find myself agreeing with two of the most loathsome, self-important, bloated creeps on earth, Teddy Kennedy and Roger Ebert.
I think that the wheels are indeed off the train. We are still on the track, but that cannot last.
One of the things I fear most is something that seems so minor (at least compared with nuclear bombs, terrorism and financial collapse). I fear our inability to call things by their actual names. This, after life itself, was the first gift that God gave us, when he showed Adam and Eve all of creation and asked them to give it all names.
People cannot voice their opinions, unless those opinions pass a pre-approved, yet ever shifting, test of correctness. We believe that calling something by a “nicer” name will make the problem go away, so those who are crippled become “special” and dead children become “choices”. Criminals are not evil, they are “disadvantaged” and terrorists are “militants”.
The first step in curing a problem is to call it by its proper name. It hurts to say that mom is a drunk or sis is a thief, but prettying it up just forestalls the inevitable.
It is uncomfortable to say that some people shouldn’t buy houses and that some jobs should go the way of the whaling industry, but there you are.
Thus it is with our civilization. I believe that we will walk off a societal cliff, all holding hands and thinking that, at the bottom of the abyss, someone just HAD to leave a nice, cushy pillow.
I am a man who delights in being right. I have never wanted to be wrong so badly in all my life.
I expect that for some the world is coming to an end. The special position and priviledge that people like Teddy Kennedly and Roger Ebert were able to hold, an elevation above the masses of proles, is I think ending.
Lots of stuff is changing, but change doesn’t mean the end, often it means things are better. At the founding of our nation many people, the Kings and Nobility of Europe, were sure that if such a nation were able to succeed it would be the end of their world. They were right.
I suspect that for most people, things will be a lot better in 20 years, 50 years and 100 years from now. There realy isn’t anything to panic about.
One of the problems is that this only works one way…it’s well & good for Roger Ebert to say members of Congress should put aside partisan differences and work for what is right, for the good of the country. They only sing this song when they have one of their own in the WH & “their side” is in charge in Congress. President Bush came to Washington 8 years ago with all good will & intention to work WITH the members of both parties, but the democrats, with the help of the alphabets, slapped his hand every time he extended it and tried to work with them. If McCain/Palin had won the election, I guarantee you would not be hearing all this talk of coming together from the libs in this country. JMHO.
Everyone should study a little history. And then relax.
We’re not as special as we think we are, our times are not as special as we think they are. Well, actually, they are pretty special, but in a good way.
Politicians? They’ve always been corrupt and self-serving. It’s a shamne they have so much power now, but still…we can fix that any time we decide to.
The press? Ever hear of Yellow Journalism? Muck Rakers? There’s nothing new about a biased, dishonest and incompetent news media. In fact, they’ve never been anything but. We just know more about it now.
The economy? We only fear what’s happening because we have had it so good for so long. Even if it does it’s worst (and it’s generally safe to bet against the worst-case scenario), we will not drop below what until recently would have been called boom times.
Threats of the world? Earth has never been a more peaceful, more safe place to live. For most of human history the lives of men were nasty, brutish and short. Subsistence living and death by violence or disease was pretty normal for those lucky ones who survived into adulthood. Not so long ago, 40 was old. Today we don’t worry about living in a ditch, we worry about moving to a smaller house. We don’t worry about starving to death, we worry about paying the cable bill (since all those free channels aren’t enough).
A little suffering from time to time is good for the individual and for a people. And frankly, the suffering we’re in for is pretty minor by historical standards.
P.S. I agree with Tom Wolfe–the American Century has about 500 years left in it.
I was going to post a response but it got so huge that I decided to put it on my blog. (That’s been happening a lot lately – gee, reading The Anchoress is a lot like getting a homework assignment!
A note to Tim McGuire: The Muck Rakers were not the same as yellow journalists. They investigated and “raked the mud” on such things as child labor in factories, the oil trust, unsanitary conditions in meat-packing plants, etc. One of them, Ray Stannard Baker, was the first journalist to write extensively on America’s racial divide – at the turn of the last century.
They were called “muck rakers” by Pres. Teddy Roosevelt because he thought they were too pessimistic and focused on the bad. He thought they should write inspirational stories as a balance.
Just a quick note on Ebert, to beware, this is common practice for all Democrats when they take control of power.
These are same folks who endlessly demeaned President Bush, often saying ‘not my President’, who tried to undermine even the most sound policy – simply due to their partisan hatred of their perceived opposition.
These are the same ones who will scream for “WORKING TOGETHER” when Democrats are in control, or a Democrat is President.
This is a part of the unethical game, just like the silly suggestion the election of a Democrat, must mean no voter manipulation was involved.
Often, Conservatives – Republicans are so decent, they have the Nation and the Public Interest in mind, and will work for the best regardless.
But this has set up a pattern, which rewards the screaming juvenile in Our Political Landscape. Now, the fashion has grown so dramatically, that if a Republican is President the USA is portrayed as an oppressive problem, but is promoted as a positive when there is a Democrat as President.
It didn’t matter that GW Bush used same the evidence provided by the Clinton Administration for the bombing of Iraq, Iraqis were brutally oppressed by a Monster who rewarded suicide bombers, or Democrats like Hillary voted to use force in Iraq, etc. – Democrats slowly began to undermine an admirable mission of liberation for pure partisan greed.
Sadly it seems, Democrat Partisans today will destroy anything to ensure their own gain, and then blame someone else for the destruction.
They call for political peace and acceptance only when they get their way, even if it includes the most disastrous policy.
No one has commented that we all would be better off if everyone in both houses of Congress
suddenly thought they were trees. Ebert’s “punch list” reads like a list of things NOT to do.
Some maps don’t lead to treasure. Only to Hell.
The Noonan quotation was intriguing. I wondered if Kennedy realized that the welfare state is not sustainable. In many ways it gives incentives that make the problems it is supposed to deal with more serious (what economists call “moral hazard”). The political response, which is driven by short-term considerations, is not to cut back the program but expand it. Europe is much further down the road than we are. How aware are people of the long-run consequences of fertility rates of 1.5 (which is the estimated fertility rate of the European Union according to the CIA Factbook)? The welfare state encourages those fertility rates by eliminating one of the major reasons for having children, support in old age, but it cannot last with those fertility rates.
But maybe he had something completely different in mind.