Because that will save you when you use a chemical to set fire to yourself.
And he seems kind of shocked when he goes up in flames. So shocked is he by the intensity of the pain, that he jumps out of the bathtub screaming for water. Eventually his friends smother the flames.
There is nothing remotely entertaining or amusing here, nothing edifying. The only thing you can say about the video is that it should teach people not to set fire to themselves, because it brings an unbearable dose of reality.
Apparently, we live in an enlightened age, where everyone is special, and people need to be told…not to set themselves on fire. Because it’s objectively bad. There is no relative “good” about it.
Finally, people, we have found a way to demonstrate that some things really are not subject to relative truths. Some truths are true always. Human beings are flammable. Flame hurts human beings.
Honestly, if this is the point we’ve come to, we might as well drop mic, close up shop, go home and tell Jesus to hurry it on up with the end times.
UPDATE: Yeah, they got me. My own damn fault, too. Turns out the “firechallenge” story came from a satire site. (Or did it? See further update?)
I’ll be honest, I wondered if it could be satire — in fact, after hitting publish, I toyed with the idea of editing the thing with a note that I hoped it was satire, because I would be happier to know that.
But I didn’t do it. It was probably my Guardian Angel saying, “Lizzie, don’t be a putz” but I didn’t listen, and I always regret not listening to those promptings.
I even looked around the page for a sign of satire, but I didn’t see it, and I didn’t do due diligence and check out the source, the site — all the things I’d normally do, as a matter of course.
It turns out you have to go to the home page and then scroll all the way down to read:
The stories posted on TheNewsNerd are for entertainment purposes only. The stories may mimic articles found in the headlines, but rest assured they are purely satirical.
Bastards! They got me! Through my own fault, my own fault, my own grievous fault, yes, but it was just so well done — the video, the news story — and so shocking, that my brain said, “this has to be real! You’re seeing it with your own eyes, aren’t you?”
And the world is so screwy these days, that it just wasn’t that hard to believe. And clearly, my brain wanted to believe it.
So, no…civilization may still be over but it’s not because of people setting themselves on fire for fun. But after nearly ten years of blogging, during which time I don’t remember ever getting snookered like this. And so much for “who you going to believe, me or your lyin’ eyes?” Good ‘n snookered, indeed.
Ah, well…it happens. I’m glad it wasn’t true.
UPDATE AGAIN: Wait a second….IS THIS A HOAX or NOT? I can’t even tell, anymore. Anyone have info about this?
Welcome, Instapundit readers! And Thanks Glenn! Maybe y’all can help me get to the bottom of this!
UPDATE: Apparently this really is real