Will Remain Catholic For Beer…

Will Remain Catholic For Beer… June 3, 2015

The question of why we remain Catholic has been asked of the Patheos writers, in response to Pew Report stating our numbers are dwindling.

I’m not much for big word-y words, preferring to keep it straightforward.

I’m Catholic and plan to remain so until I die and my big fat Catholic soul flies off to Catholic Heaven – the part of Heaven where the alcohol and fireworks are kept in ample supply. The existence of Catholic Heaven has been well documented.

My heaven is more awesome than yours

If I didn’t leave the Church amidst scandal or liturgical abuse it stands to reason that there’s not much that would make me go. Not even other Catholics.

get it out of my eyes and ears

On the other side of the coin, I don’t stay simply because I love my priests and think they are awesome guys. I don’t stay for the art, the architecture, the traditions, or even the awesome nuns.

I make this look good

You can’t base decisions like that on such superficial reasons.

As awesome as I think the Catholic Church is; with Her brains, beauty and generous nature, that is not why I choose to remain a Catholic. It’s not the beer nor the bacon.

I remain Catholic because the Church is Truth.

I’ve seen the Truth. I’ve experienced it firsthand. I’ve been baptized in the Truth. Confirmed in it. I’ve tasted and drank the Truth. I’ve Adored it and received graces and forgiveness from the Truth.

I have looked plainly and unflinchingly at the Truth and to leave the Church would be to turn my back on all that I know, believe, and have experienced.

To leave the Church is to embrace Hell.

Amen. The end.


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