remember when children were innocent and people fought to protect and maintain that innocence…

The Dowager Countess does not approve of your parenting.

... Not too long ago I had a client in my office. She was accompanied by her bubbly little six year old daughter in curly pig-tails. Adorable little thing really. This little cherub was going through a stack of decorating magazine I keep at my desk and she excitedly thrust the magazine in her mom's face declaring, "Look mommy! It's Nicki Minaj! Isn't she beautiful? I love her!"It wasn't really Nicki Manij [aka Roman, aka Rrrrosa, aka Split Personality Psycho Who Is Possibly Even … [Read more...]

Women’s History Month Tip #2, Play Date Drinking…

Wait, what was I saying

... When you become a mother your world is opened up to children not just your own. You become friends with other mothers. Your child will have friends and participate in extracurricular activities involving other children. In short, you may find yourself surrounded by a bunch of children you did not give birth to. This is perfectly normal, please do not panic. Wiser women before have paved a path that will ensure your survival and help maintain your sanity.One such survival method is … [Read more...]

St. Lucy, a class project…

"Well, boys and girls, first they tried to set her on fire and when that didn't work, those nasty pagans ran her through with a sword. Questions"

... I'm such a good mom. Or a very bad procrastinator.I was up till 2am this morning preparing today's project for my son's class. I hand drew and individually cut out 100 construction paper candles, 100 flames, 350 leaves in four different shades of green, and made 25 crowns to decorate.I printed out a color image of St. Lucy, from the link above, on high quality photo paper and put it in a plastic protective sleeve, typed out the craft instructions, and wrote a nice 600 word … [Read more...]

St. Lucy…

Francesco del Cossa

... I'm wondering how gruesome I should get with the class project at my son's public school. This week they are learning how different cultures celebrate Christmas. Surprisingly, they've also included St. Nicholas Day and Las Posadas. I was volunteered to organize the St. Lucy's Day craft. Here is what they recommend... a little bland for my taste. I'm thinking cakes that look like eyeballs, lots of candles and fire, and a nice heart warming story about martyrdom and preserving virginity. … [Read more...]

keeping my sanity this season …

MOM_PHOTO_1_CROPPED

... Having awoken from my Thanksgiving food coma, I am ready to tackle the season of Advent with pious gusto. The first order of business, get an Advent wreath. Last year I set the greenery on fire. I like to use real greenery around the house for wreaths and take holly boughs from my bushes, mostly because it's free but also because it smells oh so good. When everything else is dead and bare the bright green of real garland strung around the house livens the dreary cold atmosphere of winter. I … [Read more...]

apparently there is a time and place for down-twinkles…

... My son had quite an eventful day today. Now I have to make an appearance at the principal's office. Luckily, for your amusement, he blogged about it. My mom and her friend went to see the people living in tents downtown. She said they were down there protesting being poor and that they hate the government and taking showers or something like that. She told me about their hand signals and we watched a youtube video. We thought the twinkle fingers were really funny. Anyway, my new teacher … [Read more...]

the Christmas present drama…

... Most kids have a laundry list of wants already written out by the time Halloween rolls around. Not my son. No, that would be too easy. I told him if he doesn't hurry up and tell me what he wants for Christmas he's getting whatever's left on the shelf Christmas Eve at the corner gas station. I hope he likes 5 Hour Energy, motor oil, and beef jerky.One evening we were watching TV and he saw it! A commercial for what he described "as the most glorious thing ever". The toy to end all … [Read more...]

economics of an eight year old…

... Last night my son went trick-or-treating with a group of friends. At the end of the evening they all headed back to one friend's home to count their hard sought spoils, when suddenly one parent suggested the kids dump all their candy in one large pile then equally distribute it among them.You should have seen the horror on their little faces at the idea. My son was having none of it and boldly declared, "My mom says redistribution is just a euphemism for theft. Hands off my candy, … [Read more...]

third class relics…

"You have failed me for the last time."

... I was explaining relics to The Boy last night and we started talking about third class relics. He was particularly fascinated by the fact that you can make an object a third class relic by touching it to another relic.Apply this new found wisdom to the logic of an imaginative eight year old boy and you have LIGHTSABER RELIC [not available in stores]. He was also disappointed to learn that trying to make your own hand a third class relic will not gift you with the power of the Force … [Read more...]


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