What Does The Pope Say….


Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding. Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding.There, I fixed the translation. … [Read more...]

He’s So Awesome Because He’s Just Like MEEEEE …


... When a five year old Ford Focus becomes too extravagant, it's time to up the ante with a 29-year-old Renault4 that has 186,000 miles on it. Neat. Now I only have 82,000 more miles left on my own vehicle till I'm as humble as a pope.Wait, what? That's not how humility works?Pope Francis has already made headlines for choosing a five-year-old Ford Focus as his preferred papal transportation, part of a public emphasis on thrift and poverty. But last weekend, the pontiff expanded … [Read more...]

Writer’s Block Looks Like This…


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Fun With Penance…

Cut me off? I got your Hail Mary right here, jack ass!

... Sometimes you are just so rotten that your poor, patient confessor is forced to come up with administering a penance more challenging than the typical Hail Mary/Our Father combo of prayers.I don't know if you can tell, but I tend to be on the sarcastic side. My second grade teacher warned me once that I was going to spend all my life talking myself out of situations my mouth got me into. Never mind that it seems to have actually worked in my favor, getting paid to talk and write, but … [Read more...]

A Runner’s Motivation …


... A friend of mine keeps trying to get me to join her on all these mini-marathons, 5K runs, and warrior dash obstacle style race courses. I think she's trying to kill me. To shut her up, I joked that the only time you'd ever see me run is from a hungry horde of zombies. To which she said...Enter the Charlotte Zombie Run.On top of that, I now have to reevaluate my avoidance strategy as I can no longer hold claim to having never ran to or from anything. No, that jig was up at lunch … [Read more...]

“Latin” Mass may not be what you think it is …


... When I hear the phrase Latin Mass, this comes to mind ...imagemore so than this...imageBut that just may be the Puerto Rican in me. One is a mass celebrating Hispanic culture the other is a Mass in Extraordinary Form. It's important to know the difference because if you go to one expecting the other you may be in for a bit of a surprise. … [Read more...]

I Saw Your Boobs, So Put On A Shirt…

... Have you heard? Feminists are angry at Seth MacFarlane. Never mind that I thought I was watching Peter Brady host the Oscars; Seth Who? And yeah, Feminists being angry is as predictable as Muslims rioting. Yawn.So apparently Seth does a little song and dance number about seeing actresses boobs in films and lots of women got insulted. From the New Yorker;The song was part of a larger skit whose premise was that William Shatner, as Captain Kirk, sends MacFarlane a message from the … [Read more...]

It’s a good thing I am not a catechist…


... the tender fruit of my womb asked me this little nugget after we were done giggling over Herschel's comment that the resurrection of the dead turned out to be walkers.We had a nice long laugh about flying and vanishing relics and glorified bodies wandering about asking if anybody's seen their finger... or head. … [Read more...]

Just Call Me Domestic Diva…

Grumpy Cat

... I've taken up the classically feminine and domestic hobby of needle point. … [Read more...]