taking back my saints one holiday at a time…

... Tomorrow my son will be forced to endure another classroom party and be the unwilling witness to the character assassination of good St. Valentine. When I think of what the hippies did to poor St. Francis I get angry, Jesus style. He has to bring in 18 of those little Valentine cards to share with his class and pass out to the other kids while us parents have to bring in cupcakes and pink food. I'm sure my sweet suffering child will have to make construction paper hearts and some … [Read more...]

the purpose of fasting before mass explained by my son…

... After mass this past weekend my son informed me of something profound he just discovered; the practicality of the required fast before mass. … [Read more...]

St. Lucy…

Francesco del Cossa

... I'm wondering how gruesome I should get with the class project at my son's public school. This week they are learning how different cultures celebrate Christmas. Surprisingly, they've also included St. Nicholas Day and Las Posadas. I was volunteered to organize the St. Lucy's Day craft. Here is what they recommend... a little bland for my taste. I'm thinking cakes that look like eyeballs, lots of candles and fire, and a nice heart warming story about martyrdom and preserving virginity. … [Read more...]

and nothing caught fire…

... Normal blogging will resume after this brief moment of parental pride. Tonight The Boy served mass for the first time. I'm not sure who was more nervous but I can proudly say that no altar linens were set ablaze. That is all. Side note; when I posted these and other photos on my facebook page a few commented wanting to know if this was a mass in extraordinary form. Nope. It's just a regular solemnly celebrated novus ordo mass at my wonderful parish. A vigil mass no less. … [Read more...]

apparently there is a time and place for down-twinkles…

... My son had quite an eventful day today. Now I have to make an appearance at the principal's office. Luckily, for your amusement, he blogged about it. My mom and her friend went to see the people living in tents downtown. She said they were down there protesting being poor and that they hate the government and taking showers or something like that. She told me about their hand signals and we watched a youtube video. We thought the twinkle fingers were really funny. Anyway, my new teacher … [Read more...]

the Christmas present drama…

... Most kids have a laundry list of wants already written out by the time Halloween rolls around. Not my son. No, that would be too easy. I told him if he doesn't hurry up and tell me what he wants for Christmas he's getting whatever's left on the shelf Christmas Eve at the corner gas station. I hope he likes 5 Hour Energy, motor oil, and beef jerky. One evening we were watching TV and he saw it! A commercial for what he described "as the most glorious thing ever". The toy to end all … [Read more...]

economics of an eight year old…

... Last night my son went trick-or-treating with a group of friends. At the end of the evening they all headed back to one friend's home to count their hard sought spoils, when suddenly one parent suggested the kids dump all their candy in one large pile then equally distribute it among them. You should have seen the horror on their little faces at the idea. My son was having none of it and boldly declared, "My mom says redistribution is just a euphemism for theft. Hands off my candy, … [Read more...]

third class relics…

"You have failed me for the last time."

... I was explaining relics to The Boy last night and we started talking about third class relics. He was particularly fascinated by the fact that you can make an object a third class relic by touching it to another relic. Apply this new found wisdom to the logic of an imaginative eight year old boy and you have LIGHTSABER RELIC [not available in stores]. He was also disappointed to learn that trying to make your own hand a third class relic will not gift you with the power of the Force … [Read more...]