Paige Patterson: Donald Trump’s Pimp, Retires To Ogle Women On Campus

Paige Patterson: Donald Trump’s Pimp, Retires To Ogle Women On Campus May 23, 2018

The Truth: Donald Trump is every Southern Baptist male’s ultimate fantasy: to do openly what they have been doing in private. Yes, Paige Patterson is Donald Trump’s pimp. 



Well, well, well, the Trustees of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary decided they’d continue to pander to Paige Patterson’s sexism by adding the title “emeritus” to President and give him a cushy, paid-for home on the campus.

While drawing his fat salary, he can sit on the front porch rocking chair and comment on the dress and bodies of passing female students.  While doing so, he’ll teach the male students, happily gathered at this feet,  how to beat up their wives without leaving a mark or rape female students while blaming them for the crime.

The Trustees, mostly male of course, now may pat themselves on the back, light up their cigars (sometimes a cigar is more than a cigar), and assure themselves that they’ve kept the little women happy.

They’ll go home to find, as usual, their dinner on the table, their socks picked up off the floor, laundered, carefully matched and back in their drawers.

They’ll turn on Fox News and chortle when they hear their boy Donnie paid off yet another prostitute. After all, boys will be boys–it’s biblical. They will go the polls to make sure they elect only politicians who will do nothing to stop school shootings but will do everything to punish poor women, mainly by removing access to free birth control and family planning services. Meanwhile, they’ll quietly arrange for abortions for their teenage daughters when necessary.

In public comments, they’ll pay lip service to how important women are and how much they are to be treasured and protected and oh-so-lovingly led in those “complementarian” marriages. In such teachings, the man is the unquestioned head of the household, and the wife is sweetly submissive to this God-ordained spiritual leader. Because he is all-knowing, she doesn’t have to fill her pretty little head with complex theological questions. Instead, she’s free to make sure the children’s ministry at church is fully staffed, endless potluck meals prepared, and the preacher’s robes mended as necessary.

And that is the Southern Baptist Church for you.

They are embarrassed that their dirty linen has come to light, that the dark underbelly of misogyny is now on such public display. Even so, Southern Baptists will not do one thing to address the underlying theology that enables it and that helped put in ultimate power the small-handed Donnie, so openly sexist and cruel to women that it boggles the mind. But for Southern Baptists, it’s biblical, after all.

The truth: Donald Trump is every Southern Baptist male’s ultimate fantasy: he does openly what they have been doing in private. Yes, Paige Patterson is Donald Trump’s pimp.

Until the underlying theology is addressed, which means acknowledging first of all that God is not male and second, that women are not afterthoughts but fully human with all the rights of privileges of humanity, including proclaiming theological truths, nothing will change. And this won’t happen because all that carefully hoarded “God-given” male privilege will disappear.

Southern Baptists are toast.
Southern Baptists are toast.

I’m sure the Baptists will get better with their window dressing. They are not stupid, after all. Women’s generally unpaid or far lesser paid work is absolutely necessary for churches and other religious institutions to function. The men in power will have to figure out some way to keep them happy, so they’ll find some bones to toss at them.

But in the long run, Southern Baptists are toast. So, for that matter, will eventually be the Mormons (Latter Day Saints). It may take longer, but the LDS church no longer shows significant growth in the US. Cracks are starting to form in their all-old-white-male leadership models. At some point, enough women will be educated to blow it up in its current form.

But for the short run, Patterson will rock away, adoring male students gathering at his feet, waiting for the pearls of sexism and male hegemony to drop from his lascivious lips, feeding their fantasies of being a bundle of little Donalds, happily grabbing ***** whenever they want it. It’s biblical, isn’t it?


Photo Credit: ID 15074718 © Dennis Cox Dreamstime.com, modified by Christy Thomas

Photo Credit: Visual hunt


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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • clanhamilton

    You read my mind.

    • So I am not alone in thinking this?

      • Rose Lineberry

        Gandhi is quoted as having said, “I like your Christ…Your Christians are so unlike your Christ”. I’m so sick of this evil and hypocrisy disguised as Christianity. Thank you, Rev. Thomas for speaking truth to power and telling it like it is.

      • Linda Coleman Allen

        You are not alone.

  • Steve Bailey

    As a Canadian, I have long considered the Southern Baptist religion to be the biggest wart on the body of American Christianity. Southern Baptists, for all their numbers have never played a positive role in bringing about the Kingdom of God in the U.S. They are, in fact, afraid of and in many case shun the God revealed to us in Jesus Christ. Indeed, they have perpetuated racial bigotry, sexism and a strange kind of Christian triumphalism based on the lie of dispensationalism and pre-millennial thinking. They represent the worst aspects of the American nationalist religion that masquerades as ‘Christian’. And as historians of American Christianity repeatedly tell us, any attempts at positive reform are quickly put down by the Southern Baptist ‘Inquisition’. It’s a sad chapter in American Christianity that needs to end. There is hope, however. God can break through in the midst of this spiritual malpractice and bring new life.

    • You summed it up so very well. It really is time for them to shut their doors.

      • Linda Coleman Allen

        And you summed it up so very well. I hope those doors shut soon, but have a feeling the south will go down fighting.

      • Linnea912

        Yes, it is. The sad thing is that it wasn’t that long ago that the SBC had room for everyone from President Clinton and VP Gore, to Jerry Falwell and Billy Graham.

        This is what happens when the fundamentalists take over a denomination. Let the UMC take heed.

    • The Mouse Avenger

      You took the words right out of my mouth!

  • PastorM

    What about Dr. P’s partner in “reforming” the SBC?