Guest Post: #LoveWins

Jacob has guest posted on my blog before when he shared his letter to A&E over the comments of Phil Robertson and yesterday I asked him what he thought of this blog post over at Aggie Catholic and he did. In his thoughts he mentioned love and God and I found his thoughts to be interesting so I asked him if he would elaborate on them and write something up for my blog. The main reason that I wanted him to do so is because people need to stop reacting to everything and start listening, even if there are obvious issues that we disagree on, it is only in listening to others that we can truly see what it is that they are doing and why. When we don’t listen then it’s easy to label them as our enemies and fight them. None of that is what Jesus calls us to. We can boldly speak the truth and listen to others at the same time. I am going to ask him more questions based on this blog post, but first I want us all to really hear what he is saying without automatically going to our parroted arguments on how he is wrong. I will be very picky about the comments I let come through because this is my blog and I can do that. Whoever wants to take this and use it against me as proof that I’m a heretic because I think that allowing people to speak on their thoughts is somehow dangerous, then go for it, but I won’t let you comments through and I won’t really give you much attention at all, but I could use all the traffic I can get, so link me up all you want. 

I am Catholic. I believe in the Church’s definition of marriage. I know that God is Love and that He revealed Himself to us in the person of Jesus Christ and with His Word, the Bible along with His Church, the Catholic Church: The Pope and Bishops and Saints. I don’t deny any of this and yet, I see truth in what Jacob is saying here. The Truth that is put on all our hearts. I also see the missing of the mark on the things that influence us from understanding that God is the creator and we are the created. The same missing of the mark that leads me to cuss out my neighbor when I should love him. Anyway, on to Jacob’s thoughts. He is the son of my best friend, I’ve known him since he was child and now he is an adult and I’m proud of the person that he has become. Any attacks on him will not be allowed through. Love doesn’t create fear and I have seen a lot of people speaking out of fear in the last few weeks. Fear masked as speaking the truth is still fear.

The goal of me hosting this post is to open up a discussion, not to debate the sinfulness of anyone. Anyone who wants to discuss sins, can begin by discussing their own.

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Love#Wins:  The Rambling of a Crazy Gay Love, that’s the name of the game.

Love is an art form within our society. It can brighten the darkest of souls or be carved into a weapon against the most innocent of spirits. On Friday, June 26, 2015, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled that same-sex couples have a right to marry. Love won. This victory for the LGBTQ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transsexual, and Queer) community was acknowledged around the world, and within popular culture, the hashtag #LoveWins has been spreading like wildfire over social media such as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. I guess you can call it a victory slogan.

As it related to this subject, a dear old friend of mine and I were discussing a few things about Catholicism and Christianity and we spoke about how God is Love. I explained to her that the gays are well aware of that, which is partially the reason why our victory slogan for the Supreme Court ruling of same-sex marriage is “Love” Wins, it’s not Gays win, or Sinners Win, it’s “Love” Wins. She told me that she really liked the concept and she wanted me to explain further. So, here is what I have to say about it. Now please keep in mind that I am just one, twenty-two year old, single, gay man who works in a cafeteria and lives in the Texas county-side. I am not a politician or philosopher, so please don’t take anything I say as me speaking for the entire LGBTQ community.

Throughout our lives, we of the LGBTQ community struggle through many personal afflictions that force us to question such things as sexual orientation, gender identity, moral perception, and social value. Many of us would say that such struggles began when we were children. It is getting easier. Some LGBTQs of the older generations are still going through these struggles today. The most well known example would be Bruce Jenner, or rather Caitlyn Jenner. However, there are some children within pop culture today who wave their freak flag high for everyone to see, and they are not ashamed. Such struggles create within us a type of spiritual evolution. Because there are not many places to turn for help, we are forced to look within ourselves for the answers.

It has been said a thousand times over again that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. The pains and trials, that are specific to the LGBTQ community, we go though have taught us many life lessons, however, the underlying life lesson learned is: Love yourself. Love yourself for who and what you are, no matter what people think of you are say about you, Once you start to understand this, you begin to gain the ability to Love others, whether that be another man, a woman, your parents, or that Bible thumping Christian down the street. At a very young age, we begin our journey of spiritual morality that connects us with Love, connects us with God.

We may have been shunned and oppressed, and we may have turned away from the church, but we know what it means to Love. We do have a connection to Love. We do have a relationship with Love. We may not have a connection or relationship with the Bible, but we do have morality. We do have Love. God put it in our hearts, and we have found it.

Politically, I believe that we have been fighting for the right to share that Love with the people that our hearts resonate with. In that fight, yes we have said and done some pretty terrible things, but it was for Love. Yes we get angry. Yes, we get frustrated. We have been oppressed. People who do not understand our type of Love have treated us as lesser beings that do not deserve Love. We have fought for the right to marry for many reasons. We want the civil rights of being a spouse, the rights we are entitled to. We want to see our Loved one’s in the hospital. We want to raise children together. We want to show our devotion for one another. We want to be treated not as lesser beings, but as people, who deserve to Love.

The way I see it, Love is the goal, and we have fought for our right to share that Love. The Supreme Court ruled on this behalf. That is why our slogan is #LoveWins, because on June 26th, 2015, Love Won.

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  • Thank you for your guest post, Jacob!

    It certainly is a terrible struggle, realizing that one is not heterosexual and then coming out. I have LGBTQ relatives, and I’ve heard about this from them. Those of us who are straight need to make sure that LGBTQ folks know that God loves and cherishes them just as they are. Just as you are, Jacob. :-)

    People keep talking about love and marriage as if they go together. As Tina Turner sang, “What’s love got to do with it?” Though maybe she was talking about something else . . . Anyway, a successful marriage doesn’t necessarily start with love. People have forgotten that. It needs to start with mutual respect, and that can grow into love. Common goals help, too. And if a marriage doesn’t have mutual respect and common goals, it’s pretty much doomed, IMO.

    I sound like I’m against love, don’t I? Not at all! I was married to my beloved husband for 34 years. He died about a year and a half ago. Our marriage was not always full of love; sometimes he drove me nuts and vice versa. But we were committed to the marriage, and we had common goals. I have to admit that I sometimes struggled to respect him.

    That’s enough out of me for now!

  • Stacey

    Ok, so I love Jacob. Jacob is my psuedo-nephew, whom I also love and would kick anyone’s ass for. What I learned from Jacob is: Christians and gays (GLTL…good grief do I have to get the acronym right to be heard?) differ on what “love” means.

    To Jacob and those he loves and all of us who love gay people, “love” to Jacob’s community means, “Love yourself. Love yourself for who and what you are, no matter what people think of you are say about you,” I like that. But that’s superficial love. That is not the love Jesus calls us to.

    As a Catholic Christian who loves, TRULY LOVES (and don’t you challenge me on this you bitches, or I’ll kick your ass!) gay family and friends and knows their struggles, I say, please, Jacob, go deeper in love. Real “love” is not about me or you, individually. Real love is about sacrificing for the other when it’s in their best interest. This deep love is the only love that wins. All the others simply burn themselves out in fretting and rebellion.

  • Jacob Flores

    *Please note, I do not speak for my community. I speak for myself. If you don’t understand anything I write, please understand that. I can be all sorts of wrong, and all sorts of stupid, but that is me.

  • drycamp

    I know many in the LGBTQ community and many people outside it. Everyone struggles to live in love and to bring love into their lives, and there doesn’t seem to me to be a lot of difference between these two groups. Most of us succeed some of the time; no one succeeds all of the time.

    The churches who oppose same sex marriage are well within their rights to oppose it. After all, the Catholic Church opposes remarriage after divorce, and no one has suggested that the Church be forced to abandon this position.

    The Supreme Court case was not about whether the Catholic Church or the other churches are right or wrong to enforce these rules on their own members. The case was about whether people who oppose same sex marriage are to be allowed to impose this view on a big, secular society full of people who do not share those convictions. And to use the power of the law, which in the end means armed force, to do that.

    So the case wasn’t actually about Love or about how great it is or isn’t. It was about force. Who can force their religious views on people who do not agree? The Catholic Church “lost” that case in the sense that the Church cannot force its view on same sex marriage on non-Catholics who do not see things as the Church sees them. As a member of the secular society, and as a life-long Catholic, I believe that this is the correct result.

    Live and let live. There are Muslims in the US who do not believe that Jesus was the son of God. There are Protestants who believe all sorts of things the Catholic Church does not accept. There are Hindus who believe that there are many gods. There are people who do not believe in any god. Every American is free to believe whatever he or she wishes on this point. So also same sex marriage. If you believe it is wrong, you are free not to marry someone of the same sex.

    If we are to be able to live together in peace, we will need to learn to respect beliefs we do not share, and actions we may not approve of. If Jesus is unhappy with someone else’s behavior (which we cannot know for sure one way or the other), He will have to take care of that Himself. Being God, He will not find that too difficult.