Two days ago I had a really bad day. Every single wound I have ever had in my life surfaced on some level in a matter of ¬†hours. My sexual abuse as a child, worry for my child, the relationship with my mother, the grief of my Tio and Tia, drama on social media and the news that someone I care about is ill, all collided and I was emotionally overloaded. I sat in my car crying and wondering when all this was going to end. When Lord?I was also very hungry so my husband took me out to dinner at … [Read more...]

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/throughbrokenroses/2017/02/24/1987/

Thank you Bishop Joe Vasquez

I was a brand new Catholic when Bishop Joe Vasquez was appointed to my Diocese. I didn't know anything about him. Was he going to be a good shepherd? Would he be able to stand against the issues facing our community with love and compassion but without fear of speaking the truth? I didn't know. But someone I trust did know. My RCIA director, Noe, knew Bishop Joe Vasquez from his days as a parish priest in San Angelo. Having Noe Rocha's approval meant a lot to me because I know for a fact that … [Read more...]

When Did I Lose Myself?

I watched my three year old granddaughter today. She ran around in the living room with no care in the world. She played with the dogs, watched Netflix, ate cereal and made me laugh. She is full of personality at this age and she is beautiful. I don't just say this because she is my grandchild and the spitting image of me, but because she can hypnotize me with her smile. She has a perfect complexion, ¬†perfect hair and her head is so big but it fits on her tiny little body anyway. And then, … [Read more...]

One of the Stages of Grief: Anger

I am over at Aleteia talking about grief and how I used to try and say all the "right things" to others who were mourning the loss of something they loved.Grief is a very difficult thing to deal with because it is so personal that it's different for each of us, even if we lost the same person. We are each different, how we handle our emotions is different and who that person was to us is different.My uncle was my Tio Roy to me. He was mean, made fun of me, scared the shit out of me but … [Read more...]

Being Joyful Through The Pain, Remembering that I am Loved

I have been feeling pretty low lately. I don't feel loved or appreciated by my family, there's a real break in the relationship with my older son, my husband and I aren't in the best place and my mom and I are not really talking. Things with my mom are complicated to say the least and I have come to realize that I can only balance so much and currently she isn't someone that I can deal with. I'm guessing that is how my son feels which is why I'm giving him his space, but it doesn't change the … [Read more...]

Loving Your Spouse in the Desert

A few weeks ago I was cleaning the bookshelf in my living room and I found this picture of me and my husband on the night of New Year's Eve 2010. I hardly recognized the two people in that picture and the happiness that exuded out of our smiles. We were so happy. I don't even think that happy is the right word to describe us that night. New Year's Eve is my favorite holiday, we were new Catholics, newlyweds and we were having the time of our lives at our Parish New Year's Eve dance. The dance … [Read more...]

When God Laughs

I am off of work today after getting up at 6am since last Sunday for training. Every single day. I know this isn't a big deal for a lot of women who do this daily and blog and raise kids and are pregnant, but it's a big deal for me because I haven't done anything but write and cook dinner for that last 8 years.I was so ready to sit in bed and drink my coffee while watching the news until I was ready to get up to go get breakfast tacos with my husband (who I haven't really seen all week). My … [Read more...]

So I lied to Ya’ll

Awhile back I wrote a blog post saying that I have no parenting advice. Well, I lied. I know that new parents and parents with small kids are like 20 year olds & engaged couples who think they know everything and don't need unsolicited advice but after my week training with seven 19-23 year olds, I'm gonna dish some out anyway.Let your kids fail. Stop setting such high standards for them and expecting them to never fail at things. Let them figure things out for themselves and fail. And … [Read more...]

Sometimes God Does Not Let Things Go

I'm going back to waiting tables. I am not really sure how it happened really, but I know that I need the money, my family needs the money and that it's the only job that I enjoy doing besides writing. Office jobs make me want to jump off a bridge.If you remember, I went back to work last year around this time and waited tables as well as worked an office job. I was not very happy about it. I was in a lot of pain because my feet almost fell off.This year so many things are different. I … [Read more...]

Absent Fathers

A few weeks ago I sat in child support court for almost an entire day and let me tell you, it was a very ugly place to be. There was anger, pain and brokenness all around me. I have been a single mother, I have gotten child support from two men for my kids and I am married to a man who has been screwed over by his ex-wife for child support by lying about the amount she has gotten from him. All that is to say that I have been on every side of this issue.When I looked around at the men though, … [Read more...]