Two days ago I had a really bad day. Every single wound I have ever had in my life surfaced on some level in a matter of  hours. My sexual abuse as a child, worry for my child, the relationship with my mother, the grief of my Tio and Tia, drama on social media and the news that someone I care about is ill, all collided and I was emotionally overloaded. I sat in my car crying and wondering when all this was going to end. When Lord?I was also very hungry so my husband took me out to dinner at … [Read more...]

Did I Die? Let Me Count The Ways

By now most of you must have heard the leaked tape where Donald Trump explains to Billy Bush that he often kisses women without permission and grabs them by their genitals as they both die with laughter at how funny that is.I was pretty upset about that tape, but not because I am a prude or even that I am shocked that men talk like that. When Billy Bush says "will you give him a hug" while holding back giggles, I remembered all the times that I was the girl who was the butt of jokes between … [Read more...]

The Root of It All

When I was younger I went to a Baptist Church. I really did come to know the truth about God and salvation there, but I never felt like I fit in or like I was doing the Christian thing right. I was 11 years old quoting Scripture like a street evangelist. I would carry my bible around with me telling people about the fires of hell waiting for those who didn't give their lives to Jesus. Other kids were collecting baseball cards and I was collecting chick tracts.I am not sure what triggered it, … [Read more...]

Everything Changes: The Last Year of My 30’s

 Tomorrow is my 39th birthday. It will be the first day of the rest of my thirties. Usually by now I have thought about everything I’ve been through in the last year and reflected on where I was last birthday and where I plan to go from here. I haven’t done that this year, until this morning.I am infamous for planning my own birthday parties, which I did this year for the first time in a long time. I am excited to see friends and eat at a legendary dancehall in downtown Austin be … [Read more...]

Test by Fire

God and I have this weird relationship. Maybe it’s not weird, but I have yet to see anyone describe their relationship with Him the way that mine is. I feel like my relationship with God is a bunch of tests by fire. I pass some and I fail a lot of them.I don’t really have a hard time getting the Trinity because I have a relationship with God the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Each relationship has its ups and downs. The downs are usually because I want my way instead of His way.  I am not … [Read more...]