New ‘Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2′ Trailer: Bella is a Vampire

We’re two months and six days away from never having to talk about Twilight again

Er, um, I mean…from the premiere of the exciting final installment of the Twilight Saga.

In this just released trailer for The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2, Edward and Bella team up with Jacob and like minded vampires to fight the evil Volturi and save their daughter Renesmee.

Are you looking forward to the movie?

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Review of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

First Peek: Daughter of Twilight’s Edward and Bella, Renesmee

It’s good to have offspring to carry on family traditions.

In the case of Twilight’s Edward and Bella, their daughter Renesmee will be on hand for all eternity to help the family stare moodily into the middle distance, have huge emotional breakdowns over trivial interactions, and fight the occasional vampire/werewolf/other that drifts through town.

Here is the first picture, from Entertainment Weekly, of Makenzie Foy as Renesmee in November’s The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2. She’s with her mom (Kristen Stewart), her dad (Robert Pattinson) and a lot of black.

From what we can see, she looks just like any other tweenie girl except, you know, paler. I bet it’s hard to grow up with all that brooding. Sometimes a girl just wants to play with her Barbies, you know? Without having to emote about the horrors of eternal life and whether the Volturi (crabby, powerful vampires) are out to get you?

It’s hard enough just dealing with parents who would saddle you with a name like Renesmee.


More photos from EW here.

Read our (not entirely favorable) review of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

Bottom Line: This third movie out of four is more of the same: frothy romance with a rotten core.

The Gist: Bella Swan marries her glittery vampire boyfriend, but their unbelievable honeymoon is cut short by trouble. As always, werewolf Jacob Black, vampire Edward Cullen, and the lovely Bella emote, grow angry at each other, stalk out, reunite, emote some more and have huge problems that require lots of emoting. Oh, and Jacob takes off his shirt.

The Verdict: Skip it. Run far away. For more on my reactions and why Bella would be better off dumping both Edward and Jacob to go to law school, read my full review.

Be Aware: Rated PG-13, the film covers married honeymoon sex, which is shown but not shown, and a bloody medical situation, which happens mostly off camera but is rather intense. Plus, Jacob takes off his shirt a lot.

Things I Learned over the Weekend

Each Monday I return to work a little more informed and a little more enlightened. Luckily for you, I’m happy to share.

1) All brawn and No Brains?

Dolph Lundgren, the Swedish, musclebound hunk of meat that fights Sly Stallone in Rocky IV as Ivan Drago, the guy who bruised Stallone’s heart while filming a battle, the dude who was He-Man in Masters of the Universe…….”has an IQ of 160. He earned a Fullbright scholarship to study chemical engineering at MIT. And he may be the only actor on the planet who helped develop the water filtration system for NASA’s space shuttle program.”

Who knew?

(Entertainment Weekly, in their print edition. I’ll link as soon as I find they’ve posted online.)

2) Kunis shares an Evening with Some Heroes

Actor and It-girl Mila Kunis, like Justin Timberlake before her, fulfilled her promise and attended the Marine Corps Ball Saturday night. Kudos to her for not making the whole thing about herself, at least so far, but about the seven lost Marine heroes in the unit of her date Sgt. Scott Moore. He serves with the 3rd Battalion, second Marine Regiment.

“We had a rough deployment,” an Marine attendee said “We lost six Marines and a corpsman. Scott made sure everyone knew, he wasn’t at the ball for himself. He was there for the ones who could only be with us in spirit.”


3) Twilight Sucks the Box Office Dry

Edward (Robert Pattinson) and Bella (Kristen Stewart) get intimate in "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1"

People really love their passionate vampires. “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1,” despite lackluster reviews and downright negative reactions (including mine), grossed an estimated $139.5 million at the box office this weekend. That’s the fifth highest opening of all time, although it didn’t quite make the $142 million that “New Moon” made in 2009. (





4) Love and Marriage….

Once again proving that more money than the Queen of England, exciting careers, talent (at least in Demi’s case), and personal attractiveness are not the keys to a happy marriage, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are divorcing after six years of marriage. Divorce is almost always the death of a dream and of a possible life and at Tinsel, we’re sorry for their heartbreak.




5) Muppets Rock

All together now….Manah manah….Do do dododo…..











Review: The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

Edward (Robert Pattinson) and Bella (Kristen Stewart) get intimate in "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1"

Me and this Bella Swan need to have words.

The heroine of the melodramatic love story “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn part 1,” at 18, gives up friends, family, hobbies, outside interests, college, and even life itself to be with her glittery vampire boyfriend.

He’s not that cute and he’s not that nice. She can do better.

[Read more...]

In Honor of Twilight…here are pictures of Taylor Lautner looking like a llama

The Muppet Saga: Breaking Prawn

A story of longing, of two beings who love yet come from different worlds. A love so strong, it changes all the rules. I’m talking of course, of frog and pig.








But, of course, there’s always the lonely WereRowlf. Where will he find love?