Jesus Was Super-Intelligent Gay Man?

At least that’s what Elton John said. I think he might be projecting a bit, don’t you? Since we don’t even know whether the man actually existed, much less his intelligence level or sexual orientation, I think Sir John might be out of his league.

For once I might actually agree with the Church of England’s spokesperson who said, “Insights into aspects of the historic person of Jesus are perhaps best left to the academics.”

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35 Responses to Jesus Was Super-Intelligent Gay Man?

  1. mikespeir says:

    No, and, probably, no.

  2. Roger says:

    And he was Black, right Sir Elton?

  3. charlene says:

    Ooh can I project a bit too?

    Jesus was a female PhD student with an obsession for finding the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe.

  4. Steve says:

    Would make a great song though :)

  5. Alexis says:

    When they say “best left to the academics”, they mean themselves (CofE academics), not us.

  6. Peter Cross says:

    Man created God in his own image. John’s version of Jesus is no more absurd than any of the others.

  7. Bender says:

    Well… It was never clarified what was Jesus doing with a naked young man when the priests came to arrest him, according to Mark 14: 51-52:
    And there followed him a certain young man, having a linen cloth cast about his naked body; and the young men laid hold on him. And he left the linen cloth, and fled from them naked.

    • nazani14 says:

      A Catholic told me the “young man in the prime of his life” was probably an angel hanging around. Sounds reasonable, I imagine heaven gets pretty boring. I secretly hope there’s a naughty gospel out there waiting to be discovered.

  8. Juan says:

    Q the death threats by loving christians.

  9. Yoav says:

    I nearly shit myself laughing last week when I caught our friend bill o’riley renting about it. He was going on about how does Elton john dare make that claim when there is no evidence anywhere for jesus being gay while completely ignoring the fact that there exactly the same amount of evidence for jesus’s homosexuality as to his divinity or for that matter his existence.

  10. charlene says:

    Come to think about it… I DO see how the banana is proof of God’s existence now! Talk about a perfect fit.

  11. Tabbie says:

    Elton should be as free to speculate about Jesus as any other talking head. Why not? What does it matter? Dead guy. Long time ago. Millions of opinions. I’d probably tell Elton to shut his mouth if I were his publicity advisor, but when it comes right down to brass tacks, it’s all just meaningless chatter. I can’t help but laugh at the gazillions of idiots who’ve gotten themselves all bent out of shape and worked up into a tizzy over Mr. John’s recent statements. They need to grow up already. People waste too much energy and emotion over the most ridiculous things when they could be using their time and resources to make the world a better place for those less fortunate than themselves.

  12. CybrgnX says:

    “I think he might be projecting a bit, don’t you? ”
    What!?!?! Lets see the major part of the US thinks he is a tall statuesque, blue-eyed white guy with dark long hair and beard(probably dyed from his natural blond) and each one of them have a ‘personal relationship with jepus’ and you think Elton was projecting!!!!
    Oh!!! the gay part. Lets see he hung out with 12 guys, no girl friend, at thirty and no wife!!! and lived with his mother. No projecting needed.

  13. Mark D says:

    Talk to anyone who was raised in a conservative religious environment, if you are over 30 years of age and still not married, the religious conservatives will suspect you of being gay. Then imagine if you only hang out with 12 other single men.

  14. Roger Scott says:

    “Sir John”? Sir Elton, please.

  15. Andrew says:

    There may be a scriptural basis for the claim.. at the very least there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of scripture that contradicts that claim. The folks over at the Paliban daily have an article on that: http://www.palibandaily.com/2010/02/19/andrewk-was-jesus-gay-would-that-be-bad/

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