I regularly receive sad and disturbing emails from people whose mental capacity appears to be slightly less than average. I deduce that since they are on a site called “Unreasonable Faith” and contact me thinking think they are directly emailing some Christian moron who we’ve lampooned on the site.
This one was so sad I thought it was worth highlighting:
to be financially free, I would like the miracle spring water,
i need funds to be all my debts
i need funds to buy 100 homes for Beaver First Nations in the Peace RegionI need funds to pay for my sons traffic ticket fines and also I have 1 traffic ticket fine to be paid in full in the name of Jesus
I need a financial break threw for myself and also for my son
we need housing for all of our family members
we need to be finances to pay for a lawyer to get our reserve land back, that our ancestors had signed for, the land has been taken over by other people, the influx started in the late 1980s in the name of jesus we need to be finances, to be debt free and healthy in jesus’s name
Doesn’t that break your heart? They want some “miracle spring water” that some swindler must be selling to take away their financial debts. It makes me want to throttle those crooks who prey on human weakness and fear.
That is kinda sad. Not to be all armchair psychologist, but that person seems somewhat…out of touch with reality.
Isn’t it possible that the people asking for help are the swindlers?
What exactly could they be swindling out of? Thirty seconds of his time?
They could be trolls, I suppose, but not swindlers.
This sounds like the scheme of a husband and wife team named Popoff whom I see on TV sometimes early in the morning (or late at night, depending on your circadian cycle).
I found upon Googling them that UF did indeed lampoon them sometime last year.
Not surprisingly, they are vile scum.
On the bright side, they were burned severely by The Amazing Randi in the 80s when he exposed the fact the wife was sending messages to the husband– about audience members’ problems gleaned from cards they’d filled out during registration for “healing services”– via radio and an earpiece. How easy for god to perform miracles.
On the dark side, though they have never re-gained the same wide success they were enjoying before being exposed as heartless fiends and liars, like Jimmy Swaggart they are unfortunately still in “business”– albeit on a much smaller scale, and definitely not in prime time. Suckers are always quick to forgive and even quicker to forget.
Of course, for such potential victims as the desperate individual who sent this email, none of that matters much.
And I don’t believe the lack of language skills and simplistic beliefs evinced by the person above are necessarily a sign of either low intelligence or psychological problems. They can more probably be blamed on the general poverty, enforced ignorance, economic exploitation, and maybe even substance abuse– all of which are the legacy we Europeans, Christian or no, have bequeathed to the original inhabitants of these stolen lands upon which we now live.
All praise the mighty Randi. May his beard never grow thin.
The Beaver First Nation is in Alberta, Canada. They probably have a tribal website, if anyone is interested in offering more tangible assistance.
And here I thought “Beaver First Nation” was a strip club! {g}
LOL
I have miricle spring water and a few other items, I got them from a faith healer’s church (can’t remmember the name) some of the items a a piece of a blessed wood, magic paper slippers, sacared salt, all the items are for specific prayers, I have a nice collection :)
Yeah, that’s the charlatan Popoff and his sleazy wife…didn’t he get thrown off the air some years ago for his scams? And now he’s back, hustling the same crap, Miracle Spring Water (drawn from the bathroom tap), Sacred Prayer Cloths (torn from his wife’s old negligees), etc. The creep probably gets a tax break by claiming he’s a “church”, while stealing from poor folks like this. I really wish I believed in hell for guys like this.
“in the name of jesus, we need to be finances” … for some strange reason, I like that. LOL.
In the name of Jesus, everyone send me a dollar now so that I may become financially independent!
Pretty please?
Heh. I’ve thought about seeing if I could get 100,000 people to send me one dollar. But I’m too lazy to do it.
“Greetings, friends. Do you wish to look as happy as me? Well, you’ve
got the power inside you right now. So, use it, and send one dollar to
Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don’t delay, eternal
happiness is just a dollar away.” – Homer Simpson’s auto-dialer message
“I’d be happier WITH the dollar.” -Mr. Burns
Oh, wow. I’m lazier than Homer J. Simpson??
Sure, just send me a stamped return envelope for the check.
Funny, it makes me want to take advantage of their stupidity. And I just so happen to have some miracle spring water. And a bridge.
Yeah, you get lot of posts from them on your blogs and articles, too. I haven’t done study; I just think that illiteracy and christianity go together.
Yeah, me too. I think illiterates (and indeed most people – 7 billion people is overkill) shouldn’t breed. And I also think that they shouldn’t be preyed upon.
I bought some REAL holy water when I went to Vatican City and blessed animals at the campsite I was staying at. I also blessed my laundry before washing it. I was blessing pretty much everything just for the hell of it. Ummm ok not “hell” ummm the heaven of it? :P
if you drink holy water………..does it become holy pee?
Probably not, which must mean the holiness is digested. I wonder what the sugar content is. And if it comes in a lite version.
I’m sure if it did the Coca Cola® company would be all over it
Wasn’t Popoff also selling magic banana bread?
how can i order the miracle spring water
how much money do you have?
remember your generosity will flow back to you 5 times over!