King Solomon Pickup Lines

“I didn’t really know what he was talking about, but I knew it was from the Bible.”

They didn’t use any of the good ones though; that’s how you can know they’re conservative Christians parodying themselves. Here are some better ones:

“Blow upon my garden, let its spices flow.” (4:16)

“Your stature is like a palm tree, and your breasts are like its clusters. I say I will climb the palm tree and lay hold of its fruit. Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine, and the scent of your breath like apples.” (7:7-8)

“Your two breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, that graze among the lilies.” (4:5)

“[I want to be like] a sachet of myrrh that lies between [your] breasts.” (1:13)

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9 Responses to King Solomon Pickup Lines

  1. Andrew Hall says:

    Brilliant! The actors did a fine job.

  2. Len says:

    That was great. Almost worth calling that easy to remember number he mentions at the end. After all, 60% of the time it works all the time.

  3. L.Long says:

    I’ve heard some people say that there are parts of the buyBull that are good prose or poetry with the song of solomon as an example, but I can’t see it. The lines in in this just sound plain silly and really odd.

    • VorJack says:

      I imagine it scanned a lot better before it was translated.

      According to one story, selections from it were used as drinking songs in taverns.

  4. ScienceGirl says:

    Some of those lines would look great in the Chat Up Line Generator on this new site from Derren Brown – The Science of Attraction. Worth a look if you get the chance.

  5. Demo says:

    so… the actor on the video is sayiong the girl he’s potentially trying to pick up has a really big nose, horribly tangled hair and a ginormous navel? I’d slap him

  6. Nathan says:

    As creator of this video, I can assure you that we had to keep this video PG and that is why we didn’t use any of the “good ones”… Hope you enjoy the video!

    Nathan

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