Terry Jones banned from the UK

Full story at the BBC

“Controversial American pastor Terry Jones has been excluded from the UK for the public good.

The pastor had been invited to the UK to give an address to the right-wing group England Is Ours in Milton Keynes.

Mr Jones gained international attention for threatening to burn a copy of the Koran outside his church in the US on the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks.”

I am conflicted. On one hand I’m happy that an idiot isn’t going to be allowed to come to my country and rile up a whole bunch of other idiots – but on the other hand, I can’t help feeling that Terry Jones is a minnow who’s been made to look like a shark by a media magnifying-glass, and this just further feeds his absurdly inflated status.

I am conflicted. Conflicted is me.

Evolution of Marriage

I really liked Stephanie Coontz’s Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage. Her thesis, that marriage has become more personal and more egalitarian, seems to be both historically supported and charismatic.

Coontz has an editorial up at the Washington Post, in which she presents this thesis and some of the major arguments: Gay marriage isn’t revolutionary. It’s just the next step in marriage’s evolution.

We are near the end of a two-stage revolution in the social understanding and legal definition of marriage. This revolution has overturned the most traditional functions of the institution: to reinforce differences in wealth and power and to establish distinct and unequal roles for men and women under the law.

For millennia, marriage was about property and power rather than love. Parents arranged their children’s unions to expand the family labor force, gain well-connected in-laws and seal business deals. Sometimes, to consolidate inheritances, parents prevented their younger children from marrying at all. For many people, marriage was an unavoidable duty. For others, it was a privilege, not a right. Often, servants, slaves and paupers were forbidden to wed.

But a little more than two centuries ago, people began to believe that they had a right to choose their partners on the basis of love rather than having their marriages arranged to suit the interests of parents or the state.

Critics will say that this is simplistic, which is probably true. A theory is just a model of reality, and it will always leave out parts of the whole that some people find important. But on balance, I think that Coontz is right.

Nancy Cott, Harvard historian and author of Public Vows, seems to agree. She wrote an expert report for the court in the case of Perry v. Schwarzenegger. An extract from this report has been adapted into an article at the Boston Review: No Objections: What history tells us about gay marriage. Because of the context, it’s much more focused on American legal history than Coontz’s work.

Many features of marriage that were once considered essential have been remade, often in the face of strong resistance, by courts and legislatures. Economic and social changes have led to increasing legal equality for the marriage partners, gender-neutrality of spousal roles, and control of marital role-definition by spouses themselves rather than by state prescription. Yet marriage itself has lasted, despite these dramatic changes. Not only that: it retains vast appeal.

Why? The core of marriage as an intimate and supportive voluntary bond has been preserved. Today constitutional law sees marriage as a fundamental right. Most Americans are legally allowed to marry as they see fit. But same-sex couples remain excluded in most jurisdictions. This exclusion stands at odds with the direction of historical change toward gender equality and neutrality in the legal treatment of marital roles.

A Huge News Story, Barely Noticed

The following essay was submitted by James A. Haught, editor of the The Charleston Gazette and author of Fading Faith: The Rise of the Secular Age.

Philosopher-historian Will Durant called it “the basic event of modern times.” He didn’t mean the world wars, or the end of colonialism, or the rise of electronics. He was talking about the decline of religion in Western democracies.

The great mentor saw subsiding faith as the most profound occurrence of the past century — a shift of Western civilization, rather like former transitions away from the age of kings, the era of slavery and such epochs.

Faith in Decline

Pullquote: Little noticed, secularism keeps climbing in the United States.

Since World War II, worship has dwindled starkly in Europe, Canada, Australia, Japan and other advanced democracies. In those busy places, only 5 or 10 percent of adults now attend church. Secular society scurries along heedlessly.

Pope Benedict XVI protested: “Europe has developed a culture that, in a manner unknown before now to humanity, excludes God from the public conscience.” Columnist George Will called the Vatican “109 acres of faith in a European sea of unbelief.”

America seems an exception. This country has 350,000 churches whose members donate $100 billion per year. The United States teems with booming megachurches, gigantic sales of “Rapture” books, fundamentalist attacks on evolution, hundred-million-dollar TV ministries, talking-in-tongues Pentecostals, the white evangelical “religious right” attached to the Republican Party, and the like.

But quietly, under the radar, much of America slowly is following the path previously taken by Europe. Little noticed, secularism keeps climbing in the United States. Here’s the evidence:

  • Rising “nones.” Various polls find a strong increase in the number of Americans — especially the young — who answer “none” when asked their religion. In 1990, this group had climbed to 8 percent, and by 2008, it had doubled to 15 percent — plus another 5 percent who answer “don’t know.” This implies that around 45 million U.S. adults today lack church affiliation. In Hawaii, more than half say they have no church connection.
  • Mainline losses. America’s traditional Protestant churches — “tall steeple” denominations with seminary-trained clergy — once dominated U.S. culture. They were the essence of America. But their membership is collapsing. Over the past half-century, while the U.S. population doubled, United Methodists fell from 11 million to 7.9 million, Episcopalians dropped from 3.4 million to 2 million, the Presbyterian Church USA sank from 4.1 million to 2.2 million, etc. The religious journal First Things — noting that mainline faiths dwindled from 50 percent of the adult U.S. population to a mere 8 percent — lamented that “the Great Church of America has come to an end.” A researcher at the Ashbrook think-tank dubbed it “Flatline Protestantism.”
  • Catholic losses. Although Hispanic immigration resupplies U.S. Catholicism with replacements, many former adherents have drifted from the giant church. The 2008 American Religious Identification Survey found that 20 million Americans have quit Catholicism — thus one-tenth of U.S. adults now are ex-Catholics.
  • Fading taboos. A half-century ago, church-backed laws had power in America. In the 1950s, it was a crime to look at the equivalent of a Playboy magazine or R-rated movie — or for stores to open on the Sabbath — or to buy a cocktail or lottery ticket — or to sell birth-control devices in some states — or to be homosexual — or to terminate a pregnancy — or to read a sexy novel — or for an unwed couple to share a bedroom. Now all those morality laws have fallen, one after another. Currently, state after state is legalizing gay marriage, despite church outrage.

The Age of Secularism

Pullquote: Gradually, decade by decade, religion is moving from the advanced First World to the less-developed Third World.

Sociologists are fascinated by America’s secular shift. Dr. Robert Putnam of Harvard, author of Bowling Alone, found as many as 40 percent of young Americans answering “none” to faith surveys. “It’s a huge change, a stunning development,” he said. “That is the future of America.” He joined Dr. David Campbell of Notre Dame in writing a new book, American Grace, that outlines the trend. Putnam’s Social Capital site sums up: “Young Americans are dropping out of religion at an alarming rate of five to six times the historic rate.”

Oddly, males outnumber females among the churchless. “The ratio of 60 males to 40 females is a remarkable result,” the 2008 ARIS poll reported. “These gender patterns correspond with many earlier findings that show women to be more religious than men.”

Growing secularism has political implications. The Republican Party may suffer as the white evangelical “religious right” shrinks. In contrast, burgeoning “nones” tend to vote Democratic. Sociologist Ruy Teixeira says the steady rise of the unaffiliated, plus swelling minorities, means that “by the 2016 election (or 2020 at the outside) the United States will have ceased to be a white Christian nation. Looking even farther down the road, white Christians will be only around 35 percent of the population by 2040, and conservative white Christians, who have been such a critical part of the Republican base, will be only about a third of that — a minority within a minority.”

Gradually, decade by decade, religion is moving from the advanced First World to the less-developed Third World. Faith retains enormous power in Muslim lands. Pentecostalism is booming in Africa and South America. Yet the West steadily turns more secular.

Arguably, it’s one of the biggest news stories during our lives — although most of us are too busy to notice. Durant may have been correct when he wrote that it is the basic event of modern times.

Announcing the 9% Church

You all know me as Dan Florien the Atheist. Those days are gone. I am now Prophet Dan of the 9% Church. Let me tell my story.

A few weeks ago I was alone and pondering financial opportunies in a bad economy. I was sipping a Pepsi and as I looked up, an angel dressed all in orange appeared to me.

“Greetings, Dan” it said.

“Hi.” I replied.

“You are the chosen one, blessed above all men, and I have a message from the Great Lord in the Sky for you.”

“Well let’s hear it,” I said.

The winged freak fumbled around in its pockets and eventually found what looked like a small napkin from a bar, but he called it a “scroll.” That seemed like a stretch to me, but whatever.

The angel read the note in a loud booming voice: “TO THE PROPHET FLORIEN ON EARTH: Hey dude, this is God. Check your email. LOL.”

And then the angel disappeared.

The Email from God

So I went upstairs to my office and checked my email. Lo and behold, there was an email from God. It said:

To: Daniel Florien
From: God
Subject: 9%

Hey Dan, this is God. Srsly. I have important news for you. I know you’re an atheist; no big deal. I am too. Just kidding. Now you have proof that I exist so I doubt that will be a big deal anymore. So here’s the deal:

The current church is corrupt. Not just the Christian church, but all churches and religions. They’re all wrong. Every. Single. One. I keep telling the leaders but they always mark my emails as spam and it’s ticking me off. So that’s why I’m coming to you.

Why are they corrupt? Because they all say the members should be giving 10% or more of their income to the church. That’s outrageous! Way too much. And the poor dumbfuck members keep going along with it. What’s wrong with you people?

The True Number is 9%. Not 10%, not 20%, not 0%. It’s 9%. That’s what I command. It’s what I’ve always commanded but those greedy religious leaders kept adding on an extra percent for themselves.

So this is what I need you to do: start my True Church of 9%. This is the only way into heaven. Everyone else goes straight to hell.

You’ll know how to do it. I believe in you.

Peace out,

God, Jesus, Christ, Holy Spirit, Allah, etc.

What can I say? I was as surprised as any of you. But I saw an angel and I had an email directly from God — I had to obey.

I know you’re all atheists and agnostics and maybe you need more than just my word. So here you go: I have a signed statement from 13 family members saying they saw this email from God. I can even forward the original email to you if you want. That’s better evidence than *any* other religion!

How to Join

So now you’re wondering how to join the 9% Church. I don’t blame you; why would you want to go to hell? So here’s what you need to do. This is a modern church. We don’t need a building. We don’t need an offering plate. We don’t need some guy screaming for an hour.

All we need is a paypal button and faith. Just donate 9% of what you’ve made this year, and you’ll go to heaven. There are no membership fees. Everything else is totally FREE. So if your salary is $40,000, you need to give $3,600. It’s as easy as that.

You don’t want to make baby Jesus cry near his birthday, do you? Then give! Time is running out! You may die tonight! All you have to do is click this button and give!


Still Not Convinced?

Are you still not convinced? Check out these 9% TRUE Testimonials:

“I gave 9% of my income to Prophet Dan and my flu went away! It’s a miracle!”
—Sally in Enbread, WV

“After giving my 9%, I bagged the biggest buck ever! Thanks Dan!”
—Bubba in Woodyback, GA

“You fucking scammer! Who would be so stupid to give you 9% of their income?!?”
—Ted in New York City

“DAN UR AMAZNG!!! I GIVE 9% AND I MET THIS RLY KEWL GIRL!!1! I LUV YOU!”
—Karla in Bowling Green, KY

“my bff said to check this out and i’m so glad i did my feet hurt for yrs but now theyre healed thanks to my 9% thanks profit dan!!”
—Sam in Waco, TX

(Disclaimer: This is a joke of course. If anyone is dumb enough to give me 9% of your income, then I deserve to keep it…)

The Serious People

Over at Salon’s War Room, Alex Pareene has just finished counting down his Hack Thirty. These are the American pundits that make the Sunday morning political shows – AKA the sabbath gas-bag circuit – such a bore.

Purveyors of conventional wisdom disguised as politically incorrect insight, these are not your Glenn Becks or Limbaughs – or your Olbermanns or Maddows. They’re not that interesting. They fill the same role in the editorial page that Family Circus plays on the comics page: not funny, not insightful, but someone somewhere would object if it was taken way.

Of particular interest to us is Pareene’s take on S.E. Cupp:

On cable she plays the hip, young Republican girl-about-town — who also loves hunting! There’s nothing a booker loves more than an attractive young woman with the mind of Fred Barnes. After years as a nonentity, Cupp is now inescapable on Fox and even the liberal MSNBC. When Tucker Carlson launched his serious new news website, he picked up Cupp as a regular contributor. Her “diary” is some of the laziest P.J. O’Rourke-indebted humor writing you’ll find outside a college newspaper. You are a dumb coastal elite liberal wimp, but she drinks bourbon and shoots shotguns! And lol France! They’re all gay! Her “I watch NASCAR” shtick is a degree of magnitude more insulting to Middle America than the usual confused befuddlement with which coastal liberals view the hinterlands. She, not Katrina vanden Huevel, is the one who thinks every resident of a flyover state is a beer-swilling moron. (Cupp was born in California, raised in Andover, Mass., and has degrees from Cornell and New York University. She lives in New York. She totally “gets” Real America way better than you!)

Cupp is proof that being a Young Conservative — especially a TV-ready one willing to cynically tell the rubes that ignorance is noble — is a much easier way to make a living than legitimate journalism.