When we try to change people, we are suggesting that they are lacking, when really since there is only one mind, and we are always talking to ourselves, so we are planting the seed that we lack, that we need to change, that we are unworthy. The power of presence is amazing. By offering the power of presence to a partner, former partner, friend, family, and allowing them to be where they are at that moment, you offer them the gift to grow and in turn you give yourself that gift too. Stop changing and start listening without inner commentary on where others are, because the inner commentary is really where you are, not them.