Foster Freiss is going to keep investing in Rick Santorum.

Foster Friess is a very rich man.  No big, he earned it.  However, I’m at an utter loss for how somebody so completely clueless can get that rich.

Friess was a big donor to Rick Santorum during the Republican primaries this last election, and boy, does he ever want Santorum again in 2016.

Friess jumped into the national spotlight in 2012 when he pumped more than $2 million into the Red White and Blue Fund, a super PAC supporting former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum in the Republican presidential primary. His money helped the wildly underfunded Santorum to win the Iowa caucuses and to run strong through April against eventual GOP nominee Mitt Romney.

I just don’t get it.  This guy made his fortune as an investor, yet he thinks Rick Santorum is a good investment…even after losing a few million bucks on that investment.  You can probably guess that Friess is a devout Evangelical Christian, which has a real power to corrupt people’s judgment.

For 2014, Friess said he is prepared to continue his big giving to aid Republican candidates in the House and the Senate.

“I very, very much want to be involved in helping those senators and congressmen and women who can embrace those special values that make America great,” he said at a breakfast at the St. Regis Hotel in Washington, D.C., sponsored by The Christian Science Monitor. “Everyone knows why we’re great is because of the free markets.”

If everyone knows that, then why the need to throw away buckets of cash on candidates destined to all short of the votes of even the majority, let alone of “everyone”.

Friess mostly dodged the question of whether he would give through the more transparent super PACs or through “dark money” nonprofits that do not disclose their donors. He also waved away another query about how much he gave in 2012, including contributions to dark-money groups.

“You can ask any question you want, and I can decide to answer any question I want,” Friess said when asked how much he contributed in the most recent election. “Next question.”

He’s proud to continue giving…he just wants to keep how much and to whom a secret.

On Friday, Friess invoked a personal mantra — “Excellence embraces error and builds on it and transforms it” — before declaring that he does not regret any of his giving.

“It was absolutely worth it because I allowed Rick Santorum to express views and ideas that the American people wanted to hear and needed to hear that never would have been articulated,” Friess said.

If the people wanted to hear them, then why did they not vote him in as the GOP candidate?  And perhaps the reason some of the things Santorum said wouldn’t have been articulated otherwise, even by the top candidates in the party of anti-intellectuals, is because they were so mind-numbingly stupid.

Still, the president won reelection by more than 4 percentage points and 126 electoral votes. This, however, was not the key point to Friess. “You have to understand that the American people gave the Republican Party a mandate in this last election,” he said. “We have a total gain of 17 state legislatures since 2010 — [they] have moved from the Democratic power to Republican power.”

Wow.

I had an argument with a friend once over whose laptop was better for gaming.  We wound up taking a look at every conceivable spec and it turned out that mine blew his out of the water on every point except for one: his processor was slightly faster.  Mine had more RAM (a lot more), a better video card, better cooling, etc.  But then whenever it got brought up in the future, he’d wax lovingly about his processor speed.

That’s what Foster Friess is doing here.  The Republicans got spanked severely in this last election.  Far and away the most offensive President to Republicans in history won re-election, and by no small margin.  The Democrats gained in the House and got a firm majority in the senate.  Not only that, gay marriage and pot legalization were passed by popular vote in some states.  The election was a near-sweep.  But the Republicans gained at the state level a bit and all of a sudden, despite the absolutely destruction of the GOP in every other category, they’ve received a mandate.  Right.

Friess also claimed that the president has a weak mandate because “the total numbers take into account a lot of the center cities that went for Obama.” When asked whether he thought votes in the “center cities” should be discounted, Friess firmly answered, “Yes.”

Yes, because why should the places with the most people count when trying to ascertain the opinion of the majority?  Oh, that’s right, because most people think Rick Santorum’s an idiot.

He also sought to counter the narrative of a “war on women” that emerged in the 2012 election. Friess said this was rhetoric ginned up by Democrats and their allies in the media. Recounting an instance in which television personality Joy Behar said that Santorum wanted to take away contraception, Friess said, “Somehow that message took advantage of all the low-information women voters out there, who just follow Joy Behar and had no idea that Rick Santorum and Mother Teresa believe that contraception goes against Catholic teaching.”

It’s not anti-woman, it’s Catholic!  Because Catholic policy cannot possibly be anti-woman, just ask a nun or a female priest.

And it’s the fault of low-information woman voters?  As if men didn’t think the GOP’s track record with equality for women was the political equivalent of…well, the Catholic church.

During the campaign, Friess created a controversy when he joked that “back in my days … gals put [Bayer aspirin] between their knees” to prevent pregnancy.

This guy’s a real winner.  If a just and fair god existed, the resources that could keep starving children alive would never wind up in the pockets of assholes like Foster Freiss to piss away on trying to ram other shitty human beings into power.

However, I’m glad that’s what is happening.  Santorum is so phenomenally unelectable that I would love to see him get the GOP nomination.  Hell, make Sarah Palin his VP candidate for ultimate lulz.  That’s the beauty of the never-compromise outlook of the Tea Party right now.  They are done winning national elections, but they still think they’re the most popular kid in the political school.  If they get the presidential nomination, they lose.  If they run as independents, they split the Republican ticket and the Republicans lose.  This is exactly the scenario that Foster Freiss is about to try and purchase, all while doing his best to help.

About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.

  • iknklast

    Another problem with his argument about the Republican mandate is that many of those Republicans took over in places where Democrats actually got the most votes, but because of the way the districts were drawn, the Republicans actually got the seats.

  • Glodson

    I think it is also important to note that the GOP lost the votes in the House by a wide margin as well. It was only by jerrymandering that the GOP kept a majority there. This was an utter rejection of the GOP message. And it seems this trend will only get worse unless there’s a shift in the GOP.

    If there’s a shift in the GOP, Santorum is an even worse investment.

  • ganner

    This article doesn’t expand on his desire to disenfranchise “center city” voters, but in this article more is said: http://www.usnews.com/opinion/blogs/robert-schlesinger/2013/01/25/gop-megadonor-foster-friess-city-votes-should-be-discounted

    “”The American people on balance, I believe, want free markets. They do not want to have a system where there’s more people riding the wagon than pulling the wagon. I believe the majority of the American people want to be wagon-pullers.” … He went on to say that the problem is a lack of entrepreneurship in “these center cities.””

    Article goes on to compare this to the Republican desires to issue votes by congressional district and not popular state vote because, as a Virginia State Senator Charles Carrico said, “It didn’t matter what they did, that more densely populated areas were going to outvote them.” Let’s not overlook the obvious here. Yes, this is about political ideology. Republicans want to rig things so Republicans win. But this goes way beyond dog whistle on racial appeal. The popular vote goes against them, but “The American people” support them? This is about not letting THEM in the “center cities” dictate to US Americans how the country is run. This is OUR country and THEY are taking it from us. Scary, scary stuff.

  • baal

    If Jesus was known for anything, it was free market capitalism.

    It’s possible that Santorum is actually a good choice if your limit your universe of potentials to well off Evangelicals* who can stand up in front of a TV camera.

    *Neon Genesis Evangelion has totally screwed up the associations my brain puts forth for that word.

    • Glodson

      Since Herman Cain used the Pokemon movie theme, maybe this could be Santorum’s theme in 2016: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kFhPVAhV_o

      If he promises us bio-mechanical giants copied off of angels, I might have to vote for him…

      • baal

        :)

  • Zinc Avenger (Sarcasm Tags 3.0 Compliant)

    Why go for bigotry-lite? Choose the old-time fundamentalism. Choose Santorum.

  • TGAP Dad

    Holy wingnut, Batman! I would LOVE to see Rick “Man-on-dog” Santorum get the nomination in 2016. Pure comedy gold. In addition it would make Clinton/Cuomo or whoever a shoe-in for prez. Thus driving the right even further into insanity.

  • Andrew Kohler

    By all means invoke Mother Teresa! After all she’s totally infallible, aside from the fact that she didn’t actually provide medical care to the people in her “home for the dying,” or let their families visit them, because it’s just so inspirational to be around suffering! And even if she really had done good work with her Missionaries of Charity, it wouldn’t change the fact that opposition to contraception is quite simply one of the most idiotic positions at present in existence (I almost said “ever conceived,” but then realized that would be a dreadful pun). And don’t forget she campaigned to make divorce illegal in the Irish constitution!

    Also: “Excellence embraces error and builds on it and transforms it” is, in addition to be clunky and obtuse, one of the most asinine things I have read in months.

  • Stogoe

    “who just follow Joy Behar and had no idea that Rick Santorum and Mother Teresa believe that contraception goes against Catholic teaching.”

    It sounds like Foster Grant is saying “Ooh, that Joy Behar, curse her for saying that Man on Dog is going to take your contraception away. Well actually, he Does want to ban contraception and take it awasy from you, and he’s proud of it, but the liberal media will criticize him about it so they’re the real monsters here.”


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