Homophobes should celebrate the Boy Scouts allowing gay boys.

Christina here… The following guest post has been written by my alter ego, Christina Christianphens, and should not be construed as the actual, non-satirical opinions of me, Christina Stephens: Hello Good homosexuality-opposing Christian parents! I know most of you are furrowing your ever-furrowed brows and pointing your ever-pointy fingers at the Boy Scouts of America, [Read More...]

I don’t condone theft, but…

…it’s really hard for me to blame this kid.  He was bored at church, so he stole his parents car to escape. Desperate times and all… If I had to guess, I’d say he was probably disgusted with the immoral lessons in the stories of Lot and Abraham and decided to could learn more about [Read More...]

Comments on the internet.

I’m very fortunate: I have a hugely intelligent and well-measured commentariat here.  However, back when I was on xanga, and when I’ve contributed elsewhere… It’s funny, actually.  My most well-trafficked talks and posts are often ones that just came together in ten minutes.  A lot of times when I have an hour or two to [Read More...]

Little girl ranting at the referees.

Michaelyn and I are both pretty big college basketball fans (and we’ve both been known to jump on the officials pretty severely for missing calls).  Given my genetic disposition to getting into trouble (if you knew my mom and dad, you’d understand) and our passion for basketball, should Michaelyn and I ever produce a child [Read More...]

Why groups should never invite me to speak.

This took place upon my arrival in Northwest Arkansas yesterday. Honestly, I’m not sure how I still have a career.  I’m not sure why anybody puts up with me. Frankly, I wonder the same thing about why I still have a fiancee…   [Read more...]

How to sign a bible.

Someone posted a picture of a bible they asked me to sign on facebook and tagged me.  I felt kind of like a tool for laughing at my own joke. [Read more...]

The first honest cable company.

This made me laugh because it’s so damn true. [Read more...]

The next pope.

I’ve found the perfect candidate. He’s got a whole freezer full of popsicles. (Thanks to Shayne for sending this to me) [Read more...]

OMG! The F-bomb! Oh the humanity!

Hey everyone, Christina here! I’m still in the motherfucking hospital, but had to share this silliness with you from One “Million” Mom’s. Dear Christina, Together we will hold CBS accountable for airing profanity in front of children and families! The network did not keep their promise that the Super Bowl broadcast would be safe for [Read More...]

How to write a worship song.

Ok, you guys know my education is in music and that I consider myself somewhat of a theory junkie.  That’s why, every time I’m in a worship service, it’s like they’re assaulting my brain as well as my ears.  This video says exactly what I’m thinking. Ironically, this also applies if your band’s name is [Read More...]


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