Michaelyn on Godless rEvolution talking about mental health.

Michaelyn was on the most recent episode of the Godless rEvolution Podcast talking about mental health.  Give it a listen: [Read more...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: Today’s session.

You’d think for somebody with overpowering body issues the presence of attractive people of the opposite sex (for a straight bloke like me) making strong moves on me would help fix things. That happened this last weekend.  Twice.  And it didn’t. In both cases I just got distracted and paranoid.  I felt inadequate the moment [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: I see affection as a competition.

It was a good therapy session this morning.  “Harold” pushes me hard to explore my underlying perception of the world which might play into my eating disorder. I realized today that I view affection as a competition, which probably goes back to high school when I received little of it from my peers.  To this [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS & PERSONAL: Pictures of my brain.

I recently participated in an fMRI study being done by a neuroscientist at the University of Kansas under whom my wife studied.  They were looking for people with my affliction and, since I will never be a neuroscientist and able to help create cures for people like me in that capacity, I was excited to [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: Time to go be a lab rat.

The time has come for me to take off for Kansas City.  I’ve signed up to be a test subject in an fMRI study dealing with clinical depression.  I’m honestly more giddy about this than I thought I would be. First, I get pictures of my brain.  Michaelyn has pictures of her brain.  We’re going [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: Today’s session.

Sorry for the late start, I just got out of my third session with “Harold.” Both therapists I’ve seen at KU start sessions by asking me if there’s anything I want to work on.  This always seems so strange to me.  It’s like sitting down with a doctor and having him ask, “What treatment do [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: BDSM or Neuroscience?

You choose:   I was apprised of what I’ll have to do once I’m in the fMRI scanner.  I’m not going to say it here just yet because I don’t want any preconceived notions about what they’re trying to ascertain. I’m not smart enough to become a neuroscientist and try to find cures for people [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: Off to get see if they’ll experiment on me.

Hey guys.  It’s a rough day for me here.  I have an appointment in 40 minutes to see if I’d be an appropriate test subject for an fMRI study dealing with clinical depression. I’m kind of excited and hope they let me in.  If having access to my brain can help someone better understand how [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: Second session with Harold.

Today’s session was good.  I was in a really good place psychologically.  While I irrationally worry on days like today that my therapist will say, “Oh, JT’s in a good mood, he must be faking/cured,” I’m happy because I’m most lucid when I’m in a good place and always get the most out of sessions [Read More...]

MENTAL ILLNESS: First meeting with a new therapist today.

Today I meet with my new therapist for the first time.  I’ve forgotten his name, so we’ll call him Harold. I’m not particularly excited.  I’ve been eating the last few months and hating myself for it, but at least I’ve been eating.  That’s a step.  I don’t know…I’m just tired and not terribly optimistic.  I [Read More...]